I may need to file a restraining / stalking order

[MentalIlness]

What is all involved with or obtaining a restraining order against someone ?

Has anyone on here ever had to get one ?

I may need to file a restraining/stalking order.

 

[Crono]

Fill forms from county clerk or local courthouse.

 

[MentalIlness]

Yes, I figured that much. Is there anyone here that has had to file before ?

Especially on a family member ?

 

[CptCrunch]

...backstory?

 

[spidey07]

Oh. You want to GET a restraining order. Not you've had one or many against you. Thought I could help, sorry. Misunderstood intent of the thread.

 

[daw123]

Oh. You want to GET a restraining order. Not you've had one or many against you. Thought I could help, sorry. Misunderstood intent of the thread.

LOL, that is also what I thought; the OP had been stalking someone and had a restraining order imposed on him.

So what is your back story spidey, that you have had many restraining orders against you?

 

[alkemyst]

You need more than just filling out a form usually. This is why in harrassment cases getting police reports each time is important.

 

[1sikbITCH]

You can get a temporary restraining order from the clerk, but they will then set a hearing in which you will need to show up and explain why you think your life is in danger. If the magistrate believes you, the order will go into full effect. If not, the matter is dropped and your stalker is now twice as pissed and probably sitting on your porch waiting for you to get home.

 

[MentalIlness]

Put it this way....My sister and I live two completely different lives. We do things differently. I am not saying either way is right or wrong, because we both live the way we feel is correct.

BUT......She is continuously harassing my kids and sends threatening remarks to them and my family. And quite frankly, I am tired of it.

My daughter tells me "she is 15" that when she was walking to the market the other day, they came close to hitting her with their SUV and held the horn down. My daughter was on the damn sidewalk. I know this because my other daughter was there as well and confirmed it.

Sister or not, I want them to stay away before things get really outta hand.

Suggestions ? Restraining order is the only thing left to do I think. This has been going on for 4 years now.

 

[darkswordsman17]

This thread is epic in the making.

OP, sounds like a pretty f'ed up situation.

Based on what my sister said (she's had to file like 3-4 different times), check to see if there's different things you can file. In Kansas for instance, there's a restraining order, and also a stalking order. I can't remember the specifics, but a stalking order is taken more seriously and is processed quicker and lasts longer (have to regularly renew restraining orders). Not sure what you'll have to do in order to protect other people (such as your daughters).

Your best bet would be to contact the police and find out what to do.

 

[Taughnter]

I'll take a stab in the dark here and say that the procedure for obtaining a restraining order probably varies slightly be jurisdiction (State). Generally speaking, my experience with TROs stems from Domestic Violence matters where one or both spouses assaulted the other and the police were called. The police will usually be willing to issue a temporary restraining order when the complaints are filed for the assault. As a matter of procedure, the restrained party is then notified of the TRO and the return date for the hearing to determine whether a final restraining order (FRO) will be granted.

I'm not familiar enough to know if charges must be brought in order to get the TRO, but it seems pretty likely to me that the police aren't going to take your claims seriously if you won't press charges. That being said, you should obviously (to me) call the police in the municipality where the above mentioned incident occurred and ask them if you would be able to get a TRO (and later a FRO) and whether you would need to file chargers or not.

FYI this is not legal advice and just a procedural summary of how to get a restraining order in some places. If you actually want to go ahead, you might think about talking to an attorney or at least a victim's advocate before you do anything because there are other things you will want to consider (i.e. is your sister going to claim that your daughters attacked her? and so forth).

 

[MentalIlness]

I'll take a stab in the dark here and say that the procedure for obtaining a restraining order probably varies slightly be jurisdiction (State). Generally speaking, my experience with TROs stems from Domestic Violence matters where one or both spouses assaulted the other and the police were called. The police will usually be willing to issue a temporary restraining order when the complaints are filed for the assault. As a matter of procedure, the restrained party is then notified of the TRO and the return date for the hearing to determine whether a final restraining order (FRO) will be granted.

I'm not familiar enough to know if charges must be brought in order to get the TRO, but it seems pretty likely to me that the police aren't going to take your claims seriously if you won't press charges. That being said, you should obviously (to me) call the police in the municipality where the above mentioned incident occurred and ask them if you would be able to get a TRO (and later a FRO) and whether you would need to file chargers or not.

FYI this is not legal advice and just a procedural summary of how to get a restraining order in some places. If you actually want to go ahead, you might think about talking to an attorney or at least a victim's advocate before you do anything because there are other things you will want to consider (i.e. is your sister going to claim that your daughters attacked her? and so forth).

Good advice. When my sister did this in her SUV, she was with her boyfriend and her own kids as well. So no chance of attacking her verbally or physically. My kids are good kids, well behaved and so forth. My 15 yr old daughter for the last year has been talking about a becoming a veterinarian.

My kids are on the right track, honor roll and so forth. My sisters kids were all pregnant by the age of 14 and use drugs regularly. Hell, my nephew even goes to the methadone clinic once a day. And I prefer they stay away. They ride by throwing out obscene remarks at them, they sit a block from my home and stare at the house, etc. Things like that. And quite honestly, they cannot be trusted because they steal everything they see.

My sister and her kids, has also been sending messages through Myspace. But I blocked them. Didn't know they could be blocked until last week.

I came home from the Post Office a few weeks back, and it "looked like" someone tried prying open one of our living room windows. And also, my neighbor said it looked like someone tried opening their sliding glass doors. (Not accusing them, just saying)

I got to do something, Going to the Circuit Court house first thing in the morning.

 

[Gooberlx2]

Wow. Consider setting up security cameras as well.

 

[MentalIlness]

Wow. Consider setting up security cameras as well.

To be honest, that is something I haven't thought of. Thanks

Im going to talk to the wife about this very thing.

 

[Juddog]

Good advice. When my sister did this in her SUV, she was with her boyfriend and her own kids as well. So no chance of attacking her verbally or physically. My kids are good kids, well behaved and so forth. My 15 yr old daughter for the last year has been talking about a becoming a veterinarian.

My kids are on the right track, honor roll and so forth. My sisters kids were all pregnant by the age of 14 and use drugs regularly. Hell, my nephew even goes to the methadone clinic once a day. And I prefer they stay away. They ride by throwing out obscene remarks at them, they sit a block from my home and stare at the house, etc. Things like that. And quite honestly, they cannot be trusted because they steal everything they see.

My sister and her kids, has also been sending messages through Myspace. But I blocked them. Didn't know they could be blocked until last week.

I came home from the Post Office a few weeks back, and it "looked like" someone tried prying open one of our living room windows. And also, my neighbor said it looked like someone tried opening their sliding glass doors. (Not accusing them, just saying)

I got to do something, Going to the Circuit Court house first thing in the morning.

Wow WTF why is your sister so obsessive over you and your family?

 

[MentalIlness]

Wow WTF why is your sister so obsessive over you and your family?

I really wish I knew. It's sad really.

 

[Dr. Detroit]

Wow WTF why is your sister so obsessive over you and your family?

Sounds like he has money and refuses to give her any of it to supp0rt her druiggie ways.

Welcome to family jealousy............

 

[halik]

Wow what the fuuuu....


Why is she sending threatening remarks to you btw? There must be more to the story...

 

[borisvodofsky]

Good advice. When my sister did this in her SUV, she was with her boyfriend and her own kids as well. So no chance of attacking her verbally or physically. My kids are good kids, well behaved and so forth. My 15 yr old daughter for the last year has been talking about a becoming a veterinarian.

My kids are on the right track, honor roll and so forth. My sisters kids were all pregnant by the age of 14 and use drugs regularly. Hell, my nephew even goes to the methadone clinic once a day. And I prefer they stay away. They ride by throwing out obscene remarks at them, they sit a block from my home and stare at the house, etc. Things like that. And quite honestly, they cannot be trusted because they steal everything they see.

My sister and her kids, has also been sending messages through Myspace. But I blocked them. Didn't know they could be blocked until last week.

I came home from the Post Office a few weeks back, and it "looked like" someone tried prying open one of our living room windows. And also, my neighbor said it looked like someone tried opening their sliding glass doors. (Not accusing them, just saying)

I got to do something, Going to the Circuit Court house first thing in the morning.

Do you have a heart? This is your sister,, Your "DO SOMETHING" is a restraining order?

If you had 0 ability to help her, then it ends. However, this is clearly not the case. :hmm:

She is your sister, and despite all ill-fate, her and her kids deserve n+1 chances from you. () edit : (n->inf) assumed.

Stop being such a selfish irresponsible brother. You're not \much better than she is by looking out for only your own. Feeling high and mighty now?

 

[MentalIlness]

Sounds like he has money and refuses to give her any of it to supp0rt her druiggie ways.

Welcome to family jealousy............

Well, when someone puts 5 narcotic pain patches on her arm everyday, from stealing them from the meth clinic it is pretty bad.

 

[Gooberlx2]

Do you have a heart? This is your sister,, Your "DO SOMETHING" is a restraining order?

If you had 0 ability to help her, then it ends. However, this is clearly not the case. :hmm:

She is your sister, and despite all ill-fate, her and her kids deserve n+1 chances from you. () edit n->inf) assumed.

Stop being such a selfish irresponsible brother. You're not so much better than she is looking out for only your own.

Pffft. Get a clue. 4 years? There comes a point where "family" doesn't mean shit. Blood is a lot thinner than most people realize, because they've never been pushed to that edge. Some people are just crazy, drug addicts and criminals by nature, and take their families down with them.

Best thing OP can do is isolate his kids from hers and her family. I completely agree with his choice of action....again after dealing with it for 4 years.

 

[olds]

What is all involved with or obtaining a restraining order against someone ?

Has anyone on here ever had to get one ?

I may need to file a restraining/stalking order.

Are you trying to get one against yourself?

 

[borisvodofsky]

Pffft. Get a clue. 4 years? There comes a point where "family" doesn't mean shit. Blood is a lot thinner than most people realize, because they've never been pushed to that edge. Some people are just crazy, drug addicts and criminals by nature, and take their families down with them.

Best thing OP can do is isolate his kids from hers and her family. I completely agree with his choice of action....again after dealing with it for 4 years.

I agree something should be done. blood is thinner? IF someone can be helped, he should be helped.

This is why the GOOD part of religion works. And societies thrive under such.

 

[MentalIlness]

I agree something should be done. blood is thinner? IF someone can be helped, he should be helped.

This is why the GOOD part of religion works. And societies thrive under such.

Well, she has really been this way for a lot longer than 4 years, its just that she started hassling us the "last" 4 years. I have tried talking to her. Doesn't work. Tried working it out. No success.

She even said two days ago, that she has erased "my" family from her life. But yet she still continues.

Like I always say....You cannot help someone that doesn't want to help themselves.

 

[nanobreath]

Do you have a heart? This is your sister,, Your "DO SOMETHING" is a restraining order?

If you had 0 ability to help her, then it ends. However, this is clearly not the case. :hmm:

She is your sister, and despite all ill-fate, her and her kids deserve n+1 chances from you. () edit : (n->inf) assumed.

Stop being such a selfish irresponsible brother. You're not \much better than she is by looking out for only your own. Feeling high and mighty now?

I assume you don't have a sibling that acts like his sister. Typically they rely upon the fact that others will be willing to help then and selfishly use and abuse others goodwill to support themselves. They know how to tell you what you want to hear in order to get continuing support. There comes a point where you realize you are only enabling them, not helping. In the process you're only hurting yourself.

There is a big difference between letting your sister and family stay in your house after theirs burned and are still trying to get a new place and what the OP is going through. Family doesn't mean you let them drag you into the gutter with them.

If it gets to the point where they start to effect your life and family like the OP's is, it is most certainly time to do something about it. Four years is more than enough time to have spent trying to deal with it with less extreme measures.