I killed a raccoon with a katana

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EliteRetard

Diamond Member
Mar 6, 2006
6,490
1,022
136
I'm pretty sure I could fuck up a raccoon with my $30 machete.

Yep.

Even if you're an idiotic oaf and swing it like a 2x4.

Most of you guys are reacting like this is some insane impossibility.

Opossums and raccoons are pretty damn tough though.
 

Crono

Lifer
Aug 8, 2001
23,720
1,503
136
You never want to kill a single raccoon. You kill none or you kill them all.

Next thing you know, his entire clan of ninja racoons show at your house seeking vengeance.

ninja_raccoons_by_earthstar001-d3bwqmm.jpg
 

Kazukian

Platinum Member
Aug 8, 2016
2,034
650
91
I'm so confused, the OP sliced and diced a raccoon in his house, opting for blood all over instead of urine and possibly feces?

Poor raccoon, nothing a cardboard box couldn't have fixed :(
 

Mayne

Diamond Member
Apr 13, 2014
8,849
1,380
126
I cornered a raccoon in an attic and it took 20 hits from a shovel before it died. They are tough bastards.
 

Humpy

Diamond Member
Mar 3, 2011
4,464
596
126
I cornered a raccoon in an attic and it took 20 hits from a shovel before it died. They are tough bastards.

Fucker.

Raccoons have thumbs and furry little ears. How could you?
 

IronWing

No Lifer
Jul 20, 2001
73,336
34,824
136
Yep.

Even if you're an idiotic oaf and swing it like a 2x4.

Most of you guys are reacting like this is some insane impossibility.

Opossums and raccoons are pretty damn tough though.
We don't think it impossible, we think he's an asshole if he really did it.
 
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master_shake_

Diamond Member
May 22, 2012
6,425
292
121
I'm so confused, the OP sliced and diced a raccoon in his house, opting for blood all over instead of urine and possibly feces?

Poor raccoon, nothing a cardboard box couldn't have fixed :(

how do you kill a racoon with a cardboard box?
 

Ichinisan

Lifer
Oct 9, 2002
28,298
1,235
136
The mess you made was soooo much worse than if you simply shooed the thing away. Not to mention the suffering. Sheesh!
 

Crono

Lifer
Aug 8, 2001
23,720
1,503
136
The mess you made was soooo much worse than if you simply shooed the thing away. Not to mention the suffering. Sheesh!

Not to mention he doesn't know what the intentions of the raccoon were. Maybe he just needed to use your computer. On the internet, no one knows you're a raccoon...

2450546142_4260349e37_z.jpg
 
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shortylickens

No Lifer
Jul 15, 2003
80,287
17,082
136
last year my secret santa got me a nice little zombie machete. I should think it could also skewer a rabid my excellent compatriot.
 

shortylickens

No Lifer
Jul 15, 2003
80,287
17,082
136
Yep.

Even if you're an idiotic oaf and swing it like a 2x4.

Most of you guys are reacting like this is some insane impossibility.

Opossums and raccoons are pretty damn tough though.


well, in that case I still have the M1 Carbine.
 

DigDog

Lifer
Jun 3, 2011
14,771
3,062
136
You can actually get a decent beater for $300. This would have no problems killing a raccoon.
hm... someone's been read the Swords Buyers Guide :)

ok, back to OP: why the ... did you kill an animal you could just shoo away?
 

FeuerFrei

Diamond Member
Mar 30, 2005
9,144
929
126
Hey guys, I just killed a hamster with a hammer.

Should I make a new thread??