• We’re currently investigating an issue related to the forum theme and styling that is impacting page layout and visual formatting. The problem has been identified, and we are actively working on a resolution. There is no impact to user data or functionality, this is strictly a front-end display issue. We’ll post an update once the fix has been deployed. Thanks for your patience while we get this sorted.

I just got dutch volcanoed. By my dog.

MoPHo

MoPHo

Platinum Member
Ok so this much ownage needed to get posted. I was sitting here on my futon and my dog (a 100lb German Shepherd named Kaiser) is laying down next to me. I was sitting cross legged and had my blanket over my entire body, with it overlaying the bottom half of my dog.

And then it began.

A smell. A smell so horrid, I wondered if I had shit my pants without me knowing. Slowly, the fumes were creeping out from the blanket after accumulating and soaking their way into my clothes and skin. Breaking out of their captivity the fumes began their assault on my nasal cavities. With a few amount having escaped the initial attack, the rest sat, waiting for me to pull the blanket off and conduct a Blitzkreig on the surrounding area.

Needless to say, I'm still a little stunned. There was no pulling a blanket over my head so it wasn't a dutch oven, but more like a volcano. When pulling away the blanket, just plumed into a mushroom cloud of pwnage to establish dominance over his master. I think the worst part was that "Safety Smell" you pull when you first smell something gross. That second deep whiff to make sure you're really smelling what you think you are.

So yea. That just happened. And I feel owned. Cue the shame.
 
Dogs are assholes. I don't really like them, and I'll never own one again. One I had years ago would come up to me specifically to fart on me, then walk away :^/

I don't know WTH that's supposed to mean, but it was highly irritating.
 
My dog was sitting on my couch the other day and I smelled this horrible smell like rotten fish ass. I looked down and this greenish liquid was trickling out of his asshole all over my couch... I was not happy and the couch still smells like ass, Im going to have to sell it I think.
 
Your dog is a mushroom cloud laying mutherfucker mutherfucker!

Seriously, my dog can stink up an entire room if she's been eating something she shouldn't.
 
You want revenge? Eat the following:

Corn chips + Bean Dip + Chocolate pudding

Guaranteed to destroy the scent of your dogs nose. And possibly peel paint.
 
ChanHo78 said:
My dog was sitting on my couch the other day and I smelled this horrible smell like rotten fish ass. I looked down and this greenish liquid was trickling out of his asshole all over my couch... I was not happy and the couch still smells like ass, Im going to have to sell it I think.
Click to expand...

Got to get out the rubber gloves and express the anal glands. Your dog will smile!
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

TRENDING THREADS

Back
Top