I can't wait to get out of here

PoPPeR

Diamond Member
Oct 9, 2002
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I have the upmost respect for my parents. I appreciate all they've been through and how hard they have worked in a country which has not treated them well since they immigrated here some 23 years ago. However, I can't stand living with my parents anymore. Our views are so different that I'm counting the days in which I go to college. Once i'm there, I don't plan on coming back for at least a couple months. So many of my problems are related to my parents that my relationship with them has been reduced to one based purely on respect. If not for that respect, I think I would have left a long time ago. Before you start criticizing me and telling me how thankful I should be that they are "paying" for my education, I'd like to say that I never asked my parents to pay for my education. I had a thousand dollars saved up in the bank at the beginning of September, and I was pulling in about 600-700$ a month after taxes working at a very enjoyable job. I worked 4-7 PM, 3 weekdays of my choice every week, with another 8-16 hours on the weekends, again, my choice. Planning on going to a California State College, my tuition would not have been that much, after living expenses i'm looking around 10-20 grand a year, max. With my head start and frugal spending, along with financial assistance from the school, that would have been easy to survive, and I was fully prepared for that. My parents made me quit my job, tried to decide my college choice, and now I can't even speak to them. And that's just the short version.

If you couldn't wait to leave for college when you were a senior in high school, how did that turn out? Did you end up missing your parents, or did it work out great?
 

Atrail

Diamond Member
Apr 20, 2001
4,326
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I moved out at 17 and haven't been back since. My parents never pampered me or anything so I don't miss home life. It is good to see them but no to live with them.
 

Zugzwang152

Lifer
Oct 30, 2001
12,134
1
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and i dread living in the same house as them for 2 weeks during christmas time...its bittersweet, and i'm talking bitter as hell with a little sweet only cause they raised me for 18 years of my life.
 

Yossarian

Lifer
Dec 26, 2000
18,010
1
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Originally posted by: PoPPeR
I have the upmost respect for my parents. I appreciate all they've been through and how hard they have worked in a country which has not treated them well since they immigrated here some 23 years ago. However, I can't stand living with my parents anymore. Our views are so different that I'm counting the days in which I go to college.

Examples?
 

Packy

Platinum Member
Mar 8, 2001
2,724
0
71
I respect my parents, but I was pretty happy to go to college after highschool. I really never had much to complain about regarding my home life, though. My wife, though, left home a few months before graduating highschool because she couldn't take it anymore. Her mom has some SERIOUS mental health problems, and it was much better for her to be anywhere but home.

Now we have our own place that we love, and we really don't feel a need to visit our parents that much. We even convinced them to come and visit US for thankgiving (my family, not hers). :)
 

PoPPeR

Diamond Member
Oct 9, 2002
6,993
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0
Originally posted by: PipBoy
Originally posted by: PoPPeR
I have the upmost respect for my parents. I appreciate all they've been through and how hard they have worked in a country which has not treated them well since they immigrated here some 23 years ago. However, I can't stand living with my parents anymore. Our views are so different that I'm counting the days in which I go to college.

Examples?
The main issues of the past couple months have been pretty black and white.

First issue is having a job. I chose to only work during summertime to gain experience for the first three years of high school, but this is freakin senior year. My college apps are all done, i'm done with SAT's and all standardized testing, graduation is in the bag, and they refuse to let me work. They're reasons are iffy. They first said it woudl take up too much time, but 4-7 or 4-8 each day? I usually spend that time either at a friends house doing nothing, or eating/watching tv/on ATOT. They're second reason is that they want me to improve my study habits. I agree that I don't have the best study habits but a big reason, to me, is because of my work environment, which consists of ongoing TV"s everywhere, the phone ringing off the hook, 3 sisters, two with boyfriends who are over 24/7, and just general chaos around the house. I study much better at the library or at a friends house, which brings me to the next issue, of a car

I want a car, i don't care how good it is, i offered to pay for it, including gas, insurance, everything, but parents said no. Its not they can't afford it, its my mom thinks i don't deserve one, and when i offered to buy one for myself they said no child of mine is going to have a crappy used car. So my going out time is limited and it basically makes my life hell.

College was a big issue. I'm content with going to a state. Major in business, minor in computer science (maybe), 4 years, in, out, get a job, get on with my life. I plan on doing good in college, and I think if I try hard enough it doens't matter what college I go to, I can get a good job no matter what, and after consulting with my friends mom, who hires people like me for a living, I'm confident I will have a job 4 years down the line. Parents on the other hand, being asian and having no knowledge of america's college system, wanted me to go community for two years then transfer to a big name UC so they could brag to their friends, then they would disown me after I fail out because I don't believe I can survive in that kind of environment, or at least not do as well as I would at a state.
 

Argo

Lifer
Apr 8, 2000
10,045
0
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I left my house when I was 17 and never came back. It's been hard at times and at times I wanted to run back home - but I'm glad I didn't. However, you need to realize that by moving out you won't be solving all your problems, you'll be just exchanging them for a bunch of new ones.
 

HappyPuppy

Lifer
Apr 5, 2001
16,997
2
71
If you really wanted to jump ship and do it on your own, you would do it. Your parents can't force you to take their money. When you turn 18 they can't prevent you from buying a car or working. On the other hand, you could do like many others here have done, myself included, when school is out, leave. Stuff your clothes in a trash bag and walk out the door.

Only you can take charge of your life.