- Dec 1, 2000
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Sometimes people need help, so you try to help them. Sometimes they appreciate it. Sometimes they get embarassed because needing help implies they're somehow "weak."
Sometimes you want to build trust but end up doing the opposite. Sometimes your genuine efforts are interpreted as manipulative.
Steven R. Covey was right - it all comes down to character. No tactic or technique in the world matters because your character always speaks louder than your words.
You can never get someone to trust you if you're a known liar or manipulator.
You can never get someone to open up to you if you're a known gossip.
And sometimes you succeed - you build that trust, those lasting relationships - only to have the slightest mistake send that trust down the tubes.
Or you build the trust and then have a slip in judgement and mis-use the trust to your own advantage. There's a way to ruin a friendship.
Or you get misinterpreted. You don't talk for a while and the other person assumes you're angry about something and starts inventing reasons. You say something vague and they interpret it as a comment about them.
I guess it's all about managing sensitive egos and insecurities.
Maybe some of you realized this early in life, but lately I've realized that the biggest asset I have is trust.
Money, skills and status come relatively easily to me and mean less and less these days.
But if people don't trust you then nothing else matters. You have to live with integrity to the best of your ability.
I was always TOLD that, but I never really understood it.
Sometimes you want to build trust but end up doing the opposite. Sometimes your genuine efforts are interpreted as manipulative.
Steven R. Covey was right - it all comes down to character. No tactic or technique in the world matters because your character always speaks louder than your words.
You can never get someone to trust you if you're a known liar or manipulator.
You can never get someone to open up to you if you're a known gossip.
And sometimes you succeed - you build that trust, those lasting relationships - only to have the slightest mistake send that trust down the tubes.
Or you build the trust and then have a slip in judgement and mis-use the trust to your own advantage. There's a way to ruin a friendship.
Or you get misinterpreted. You don't talk for a while and the other person assumes you're angry about something and starts inventing reasons. You say something vague and they interpret it as a comment about them.
I guess it's all about managing sensitive egos and insecurities.
Maybe some of you realized this early in life, but lately I've realized that the biggest asset I have is trust.
Money, skills and status come relatively easily to me and mean less and less these days.
But if people don't trust you then nothing else matters. You have to live with integrity to the best of your ability.
I was always TOLD that, but I never really understood it.
