How to kill a vampire, These people list ways to kill a vampire

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by tyler811, Aug 16, 2006.

  1. tyler811

    tyler811 Diamond Member

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    Some of these are actually quite funny


    One person wrote:

    Holy Water - 2 parts water, 1 part clergyman - stir throughly - worked in From Dusk Till Dawn and Constanine (demons technically not vampires I know, but derived from the same evil/hellish origins). I wonder if its restrcited by religion, can you be Hindu and bless the water and have the same effect? If you are ordained as a minister on the internet, does God acknowledge this as a commitment to his will? Does the water have to be pure? Can you use urine? If a priest pisses on a vampire will that work?

    Can anyone else add to the "How to kill a vampire"


    Also as an added bonus you can donate money to this guy for his education:laugh:
     
  2. cKGunslinger

    cKGunslinger Lifer

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    Stake through the heart or prolonged exposure to sunlight are about he only ways to defeat a "real" vampire.

    Religious items play no role, sorry.
     
  3. Lorax

    Lorax Golden Member

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    garlic, mmmm
     
  4. Baked

    Baked Lifer

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    UV LAMP!
     
  5. mattpegher

    mattpegher Platinum Member

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    So far according to the various movies:
    Stake through the heart, old movies said it had to stay there or else reanimation
    Sunlight, newer movies using UV emiters in various forms, spot, UV rounds
    Holy water, usually only burns them, but pouring it in the casket meant they couldn't return to rest.
    Holy symbols, must have faith or useless, ?any faith?
    EDTA used by blade to explode vampiric cells
    Although many movies have used silver weapons, the purests reserve this for lycantropes.
    Garlic was only a repelent.
     
  6. pontifex

    pontifex Lifer

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    cutting off the head and burying it separately from the body will keep one dead.
    also something about running water. they can't cross it or something like that?

    read Carpe Jugulum by Terry Pratchett
     
  7. slsmnaz

    slsmnaz Diamond Member

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    How bout don't believe in them in the first place? They all die quickly that way.
     
  8. geecee

    geecee Platinum Member

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    Although not listed as an official way, I get the feeling that shoving the vampire through a wood chipper (a la Fargo) would probably be pretty effective. And if not, then have clergy bless the damn wood chipper and then repeat! :p

    EDIT: For clarification
     
  9. pontifex

    pontifex Lifer

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    that pretty much only works with gods.

     
  10. Demon-Xanth

    Demon-Xanth Lifer

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    Lock them in a theatre playing a non stop marathon of Michael Moore movies. They'll kill themselves within 24 hours.
     
  11. CombatChuk

    CombatChuk Platinum Member

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    Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick
     
  12. tyler811

    tyler811 Diamond Member

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    I felt the urge to slit my wrists when I say his name in your post;)
     
  13. Raduque

    Raduque Lifer

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  14. randay

    randay Lifer

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    Crushed under 40,000 tons of steel.
    Nuclear explosion.
    Sucked into a black hole.
    Thrown into the sun.
    Chopped up into little peices then dehydrated or cooked in one of Ron Popeils inventions and then eaten by priests.
    Direct hit from the Deathstar.
    Fisticuffs to the death with William Shatner.
     
  15. Molondo

    Molondo Platinum Member

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    Kung fu Rip the chest apart and grab the heart and eat it infront of them in a split second and yell out, OWNED NOOB LOL11