How to get out of jury duty

Toggle sidebar Toggle sidebar
D

Dari

Lifer
Oct 25, 2002
17,133
38
91
So last month my wife tells me I got a letter from the supreme court. At first I was happy, thinking I was invited for tea or something from the SCOTUS. Then I found out it was from the New York supreme court. I got worried, thinking my past was coming to haunt me. Then I opened it and it was a form for jury duty. I promptly tore it up and put it in the trash. Then my wife saw it and went online and filled out the form. Now I have to report for jury duty. You'd think, with all the taxes I donate to government, they'd leave me alone with this bs. I have things to do. So, now that I cannot say I never got it, what are my options? I have to report in a month.
 
raasco

raasco

Platinum Member
Feb 6, 2009
2,638
3
76
Show up. It's your civic duty even though it will undoubtedly suck.
 
BoomerD

BoomerD

No Lifer
Feb 26, 2006
66,007
14,411
146
Dari said:
So last month my wife tells me I got a letter from the supreme court. At first I was happy, thinking I was invited for tea or something from the SCOTUS. Then I found out it was from the New York supreme court. I got worried, thinking my past was coming to haunt me. Then I opened it and it was a form for jury duty. I promptly tore it up and put it in the trash. Then my wife saw it and went online and filled out the form. Now I have to report for jury duty. You'd think, with all the taxes I donate to government, they'd leave me alone with this bs. I have things to do. So, now that I cannot say I never got it, what are my options? I have to report in a month.
Click to expand...

With all the taxes you donate to the government, you should be proud to take part in one of the greatest things an American can do...send some piece of shit to prison for the rest of his life.
 
P

Pardus

Diamond Member
Jun 29, 2000
8,197
21
81
Dari, next time take the notice and shread it. For now, you're fucked.
 
onlyCOpunk

onlyCOpunk

Platinum Member
May 25, 2003
2,532
1
0
You should go it's fun.

Sure the waiting around to get picked is dull and time consuming, but if you get selected for a good case it's fun.
 
JEDIYoda

JEDIYoda

Lifer
Jul 13, 2005
33,986
3,321
126
Dari said:
So last month my wife tells me I got a letter from the supreme court. At first I was happy, thinking I was invited for tea or something from the SCOTUS. Then I found out it was from the New York supreme court. I got worried, thinking my past was coming to haunt me. Then I opened it and it was a form for jury duty. I promptly tore it up and put it in the trash. Then my wife saw it and went online and filled out the form. Now I have to report for jury duty. You'd think, with all the taxes I donate to government, they'd leave me alone with this bs. I have things to do. So, now that I cannot say I never got it, what are my options? I have to report in a month.
Click to expand...
Your wife saved you some jail time!! In some places in the US the judge will put you in jail! The old I never received it , does not work!
 
madoka

madoka

Diamond Member
Jun 22, 2004
4,344
712
121
JEDIYoda said:
Your wife saved you some jail time!! In some places in the US the judge will put you in jail! The old I never received it , does not work!
Click to expand...

Courts seemed to have become much more serious about jury duty. In CA, claiming not to have received it results in a fine and then still having to serve.

I got picked for a felony gun possession case which was estimated for 10 days. When asked if I owned any guns, I told them I had around 100 of them. They quickly cut me loose.
 
  • Like
Reactions: brianmanahan
C

cubby1223

Lifer
May 24, 2004
13,518
42
86
Dari said:
So last month my wife tells me I got a letter from the supreme court. At first I was happy, thinking I was invited for tea or something from the SCOTUS. Then I found out it was from the New York supreme court. I got worried, thinking my past was coming to haunt me. Then I opened it and it was a form for jury duty. I promptly tore it up and put it in the trash. Then my wife saw it and went online and filled out the form. Now I have to report for jury duty. You'd think, with all the taxes I donate to government, they'd leave me alone with this bs. I have things to do. So, now that I cannot say I never got it, what are my options? I have to report in a month.
Click to expand...

That certainly changes the situation. You have things to do while the rest of us don't. How special you are.

Make sure to mention when you're in the jury selection process that you pleaded your case against jury duty across the internet. The judge will sympathize.
 
Last edited:
RaistlinZ

RaistlinZ

Diamond Member
Oct 15, 2001
7,470
9
91
I'd be asking my wife why she's digging through the trash looking at documents I already tore up and threw away.

:colbert:
 
OBLAMA2009

OBLAMA2009

Diamond Member
Apr 17, 2008
6,574
3
0
ive never gone to jury duty evar, all the counties ive lived in probably think ive moved. i just ignore it, i have no choice, i dont have the time and id rather post here
 
Jeeebus

Jeeebus

Diamond Member
Aug 29, 2006
9,181
901
126
Just print 2 or 3 random threads you've started in the last year and show them to the judge. He'll know you're unreliable and living in a fantasy world and dismiss you.
 
IronWing

IronWing

No Lifer
Jul 20, 2001
72,410
32,993
136
Get a "God is the Judge, Judges aren't God" bumper sticker. You'll be out the door in no time.
 
13Gigatons

13Gigatons

Diamond Member
Apr 19, 2005
7,461
500
126
If I land on a jury everyone goes free.


PS: Just watched a NOVA show that fingerprints where almost always wrong.
 
Last edited:
Scotteq

Scotteq

Diamond Member
Apr 10, 2008
5,276
5
0
You absolutely have to go - If you don't, the courts can issue a bench warrant.

When you get there, be exceedingly polite, talkative, and cooperative. Chat with everyone you can, listen and smile a lot. In short, Make yourself friends with everyone you meet. Then when you get to the waiting room, hang up your coat and pants, take a seat, and read the book you brought.

They won't call you again.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

TRENDING THREADS

COMPANY
RESOURCES
FOLLOW
Top Bottom