How to deal with vindictive former roommate?

Sep 7, 2009
Cliffs at bottom.

My house has a basement room (totally separate living/kitchen i.e. in-law suite) which I've allowed a friend of my SO to stay for the past 6 months or so (yes she paid rent, yes I report it, although no lease).

I've now realized this girl may have some serious mental issues.. I have seen her be extremely vindictive for NO reason to a few of her classmates, and she's mentioned 'issues' with being vindictive and manic depressive (or bi polar?)

Basically, she will flip out for absolutely no reason. I'm a young business professional and am never loud, rarely company over, etc. About two weeks ago I had an old friend from high school over to play video games.. The volume was up loud (not extremely, I'd say the max level you'd play in an apartment setting.. i.e. she could hear 'something' was going on but not distinct voices or whatnot) at 2pm on a Saturday.

She banged on the door extremely loudly.. and continued banging even after I turned it down and walked down to answer. She more or less flipped out.. I told her that I am absolutely not going to discuss this with company over but that I am disappointed that she decided to bring it up in this way, and that we would talk about it later. She went sorta crazy.. and I reiterated that I have company over and am not going to get into a screaming match with her. (btw, later on she txt'd my SO that she was "thinking of mean things to do to me")

She left the house and I talked to her the next day. I was polite but told her that I simply am not at a point in my life where I am ok with being confronted with company over for playing a video game loud once every 6 months. I told that I understand her right to privacy and peace, but that I don't want my door banged on when I have company over - period. I explained that I would not bother her if she had company over (which her and my SO do, and they're very loud sometimes - actually the night before our incident come to think of it) and I want the same respect. (fwiw she sent me one txt that I didn't get because I didn't have my phone on me)

She said I was selfish, rude, passive aggressive, and more or less started going crazy after that. I don't remember exactly how the conversation ended (Edit: now I remember - I told her that if she had a problem with me not wanting to be disturbed with company over that she needs to find somewhere else to live.) but she ended up deciding to move out over all of it. We discussed the details via facebook messaging which ended on a somewhat positive note, me saying I hope this doesn't come between her and my SO or I's friendship, and that it's simply a difference of ways we live - her saying she agrees and blah blah.

However, the past few days she's been moving her stuff, the entire time slamming doors and being a brat. I basically am realizing that I now have to worry about her possibly doing something crazy towards me.

Thoughts? First thing I'm going to do is take pictures of that threatening txt attached to her phone number.

My primary concern is this - she told my SO a story about calling in a fake drug charge on a former roommate.

This girl knows where I work, and could definitely cause me a lot of grief if she started making things up and accusing me of things.

We are friends on facebook, I could post some sort of status message qoute relating to being vindictive or something but I don't want to be juvenile about all of it. Maybe insinuating I'm glad phones will save incriminating txt or something?

Also, she's currently in a graduate school that recquires one of those moral fitness tests or whatever.. In other words, if she did do something to me it would have to be totally anonymous or she would have to report herself (or I could report her). I.E. if I got a restraining order against her it would cause her a LOT of grief.


Rented in-law suite to crazy friend with history of being vindictive. How do I make sure she realizes I am not the right person to screw with?
Last edited:
Sep 7, 2009
Uh she's already moving out, she has a history of calling in 'fake' drug charges on someone over less than this. I'm worried that she might try to contact my work and make something up.

Should I let my HR department know that I have a disgruntled renter moving out?


Diamond Member
Jul 12, 2007
Boot her out of the house. If she starts spreading false information about you, particularly to your employer, sue her for slander.


Sep 11, 2005
Kick her out, get a restraining order, then tell HR at work what's up in case she tries to pull some shit on you.


Diamond Member
May 12, 2000
Serve her an officially eviction notice and then ask a judge to issue a temporary restraining order for you and your residence (so she can't come back when you're not there).