How this for a generic Resume?????? ???????

[Vette73]

Tell me whats good and bad. I am going to take off the part about knowing how to use windows 2000 server and other things along those lines as I DON'T won't to be a computer person, but this job I am appling for is for Admin of the companies systems. And right now I just got out of school so I really don't want that type of job, but I will take it.


So here it is!!!!!UPDATED may 19

 

[SoylentGreen]

Looks good

 

[Mucho]

"Honest, reliable and productive"

Thats like saying you are over twelve years old.

 

[Vette73]

Originally posted by: Mucho
"Honest, reliable and productive"

Thats like saying you are over twelve years old.

You be suprised at how many people I had to do group projects with that may not fit one if not more of those lines.

But thanks for being HONEST

 

[notfred]

Wow, that's a lousy resume.

SUMMARY OF QUALIFICATIONS
Highly inquisitive, creative and resourceful.
Excellent skills in communication and collaboration.
Good working knowledge of technology.
Effective at working alone, a cooperative team member, or team leader.
Excellent reputation with customers as a competent, knowledgeable and helpful professional.
Honest, reliable, and productive.

That entire section is a bunch of nothing. It doesn't say anything, other than "I'm good at stuff that I can't prove".

SUMMARY OF SKILLS
Have been exposed to Windows 2000 server, Windows 2000 Pro, and Windows XP Pro
Know the full workings of computer hardware. I build and repair computers, from desktops to dual processor systems.
Have setup and ran small networks. With the systems running Windows XP and/or 2000.
Have kept up with current technology and am aware of what works and what does not work, in terms of price, performance, and reliability.

I've been exposed to the Blue Angels. So what? I can't fly them. "Exposed" makes it sound like someone spent half an hour showing you what IIS does. "With the systems running Windows XP and/or 2000." isn't even a proper sentence. Neither is "Have setup and ran small networks." since "Setup" isn't a verb.

Finally in education you've got some quantifiable information, but it's repeated twice. Just say "Concentration in Information Systems and Business Management", dont lsit the same degree twice.

"Self-Employed - fixed cars and built computers" - In my mind, this means "did a few odd jobs on the side". It says nothing about your employability, management skills, or anything else.

Finally you list an actual job at the very end, and you say "I only got this job cause I know the manager".


If I got that resume, I'd throw it in the trash.

 

[jimmyhaha]

this is a VERY LOUSY resume.

search for thread for more detail.

gurantee to be tossed by HR personnel into trash within 10 secs...

sorry guys, I can't stop laughing at what I have seen so far...

and yes, there is NO SHORT CUT for a perfect resume, do your homework..

 

[SuepaFly]

Hmm, do you have any high school activities to add? Like clubs or sports, stuff like that? Even if you volunteers for an hour doing something, I think it would sound better on your resume. I'd do that to replace the Summary of Qualifications section, thats basically what a resume is supposed to do, summarize why you should be hired.

Also I agree with whom ever posted below, the language is off under Summary of Skills. Try to limit it to something more solid. Instead of "Have been exposed to Windows 2000 server, Windows 2000 Pro, and Windows XP Pro" divide things up into things you know really well and things you sort of know by language. "Extensive experience in...." if you need to add on to that like the bulding computer things, put it as a bullet underneath. Then for stuff you sort of know put as "Experience with..." or "Knowledge of..." something like that.

Plus reorder everything in priority. If a human is looking at it, they will scan with their eyes. Order everything from the most pertinent on top, to the not so pertinent on bottom. Even do this within catagories.

Hope this helps. Let me know if you want any help.

 

[BDawg]

Please tell me you seriously don't live on lollipop lane.

Everyone who's seen my resume has given it glowing reviews. PM me if you'd like a copy to see.

 

[BDawg]

IMHO, you need to do the following -

Get rid of the qualifications. Put those on a seperate sheet of paper that lists your skills. In the IT field, it is perfectly allright to have a longer than 1 page resume.

Get rid of anything that speaks to your reliability or emotions. That's what references and interviews are for.

Put your job experience first. Even though it's not much, employeers want to see what you've done first.

Make your education smaller and put it underneath your experience - unless you're applying for a position that specifically addresses things such as GPA.

As your list of skills and experiences grows, don't forget to change them around to suit positions you're applying for. I customize my resume to each position I apply for.

 

[dafatha00]

Not to be rude but this is the worst resume I have ever seen

 

[bUnMaNGo]

Originally posted by: dafatha00
Not to be rude but this is the worst resume I have ever seen

same... go to your school's career center, they should be able to help you out

 

[sciencetoy]

I've seen worse.

How to fix it:
Name, Address & contact info

Job history info goes next (don't use the word "employment") Like this:

2001-present
Automobile and Computer Repair
Marlin's, Wilmington NC
diagnosed and repaired cars and computers

2002-present
Commercial Account Specialist
Autozone, Wilmington NC
part time
associate in handling large commercial accounts

got it? date, job title, place, and then your contribution to the bottom line of the company

then:

School, major if applicable, any honors/awards/leadership positions

References: probably better not to name them, but make sure you have them

Tech stuff: commonly put into a long string, with the one you are most proficient in first. Warning, you will be called on this stuff, so be sure you aren't faking it. It's easy for an employer to check you out on your tech knowledge.

Quantify your tech knowledge. How many lines of code have you written? How many projects? How many computers networked? Etc.


The other stuff you should leave out. Your references will tell if you are honest, trustworthy, etc.

Good luck.

 

[Mean MrMustard]

So what's the purpose of this resume?

Their isn't an objective anywhere on the resume. The objective should be first thing after the contact information.

 

[yoda291]

I got all the way up to the first line of "summary of qualifications" and decided it was getting chucked into the garbage. not only does it NOT tell me any of your qualifications, it LOOKS like you're padding the resume with fluff...and it's not even well thought out fluff. It's just standard cut and paste fluff.

and, you're switching from english to phrases back to english.

 

[MikeMike]

make sure your grammar is right too.

ie.
"Have setup and ran small networks. With the systems running Windows XP and/or 2000."

wtf is have setup and ran? that is a present with a past in the same setup.

and run!!!

start off the sentences with a verb. here is my resume, http://www.brownwestern.com/resume.htm , Straight up normal word doc, you can use the format if you want

yeah there is no formatting, just a straigt copy and paste from word, the academics section is gunna change, all the rest will be basically the same. this one is targeted towards colleges. the main sections will be bolded, my name is bolded, it is tabbed in from the Main sections to sub categories, to sentences about them. all with decreasing boldness, and size.

MIKE Straight up normal word doc, you can use the format if you want

 

[Angrymarshmello]

Originally posted by: nourdmrolNMT1
make sure your grammar is right too.

ie.
"Have setup and ran small networks. With the systems running Windows XP and/or 2000."

wtf is have setup and ran? that is a present with a past in the same setup.

and run!!!

start off the sentences with a verb. here is my resume, http://www.brownwestern.com/resume.htm

yeah there is no formatting, just a straigt copy and paste from word, the academics section is gunna change, all the rest will be basically the same. this one is targeted towards colleges. the main sections will be bolded, my name is bolded, it is tabbed in from the Main sections to sub categories, to sentences about them. all with decreasing boldness, and size.

MIKE

No offense Mike but listing the grades you got in each course is just filler - it doesn't help your resume. And if you want to get into an engineering program, why the HEAVY emphasis on your athletic abilities? That helps nothing.

 

[MikeMike]

here, i will quote myself.....

"the academics section is gunna change" it was filler so i could get time to redo the page, cuz we had to turn sumthing in, so we can make unlimitd corrections until end of year, its a requirement for our junior english. athletics is just there, it makes it look beter, and supports my first statements. academics will have stuff about the business my business class ran succesfully, i was V.P. of finance. profitable. will have something about awards i have recieved. wont have class rank, im like 131 out of 230 and my gpa isnt to bad, but not good enough, and some other academice, and then some skills i will put in.

 

[Angrymarshmello]

Originally posted by: nourdmrolNMT1
here, i will quote myself.....

"the academics section is gunna change" it was filler so i could get time to redo the page, cuz we had to turn sumthing in, so we can make unlimitd corrections until end of year, its a requirement for our junior english. athletics is just there, it makes it look beter, and supports my first statements. academics will have stuff about the business my business class ran succesfully, i was V.P. of finance. profitable. will have something about awards i have recieved. wont have class rank, im like 131 out of 230 and my gpa isnt to bad, but not good enough, and some other academice, and then some skills i will put in.

I assume you're still in high school? If that's the case I guess it's fine. However if you're in college, that really really really will not cut it in the real world.

 

[jimmyhaha]

I assume you're still in high school? If that's the case I guess it's fine. However if you're in college, that really really really will not cut it in the real world.

be kind, folks.. he's only a clueless HS kid..

just IM the guy, can't blame him for his resume

lol...

 

[MikeMike]

yea i b in highschool, will post my final resume for college when i am done with it then you can rip on me when it is complete.

 

[Deleted member 4644]

You have several grammatical errors:


MAKE THE FOLLOWING CHANGES

SUMMARY OF QUALIFICATIONS

Highly inquisitive, creative and resourceful.

Excellent communication and collaboration SKILLS

Good working knowledge of technology.

Effective at working alone, as a cooperative team member, or as a team leader.

Excellent reputation with customers as a competent, knowledgeable and helpful professional.

Honest, reliable, and productive.






SUMMARY OF SKILLS

Have USED Windows 2000 server, Windows 2000 Pro, and Windows XP Pro

Have KNOWLEDGE of the full workings of computer hardware. BUILD and repair computers, from desktops to dual processor systems.

Have setup and RUN small networks. With the systems running Windows XP and/or 2000.

Have kept up with current technology and am aware of what works and what does not work, in terms of price, performance, and reliability.






EDUCATION

University of North Carolina at Wilmington

Bachelor of Science, Business Administration , 2003

Concentration in Business Management



University of North Carolina at Wilmington

Bachelor of Science, Business Administration, 2002

Concentration in Information Systems








EMPLOYMENT

Marlins, Wilmington NC 28401

Self Employed, 2000 - Present

Diagnosed and repaired automobiles, and built and repaired computers.





Autozone, Wilmington NC 28401

Commercial accounts specialist, 2002 - Present

I accepted this job as I know the store manger and he was in need of someone that could work well with people, use computers, and handle large commercial accounts. I only work one day a week as my own business required most of my time.

 

[Vette73]

I have not wrote back as the FIRST resume you saw was a basic draft I had to come up with VERY fast.

I have made some changes so check them out. It is still not 100% final but slowly getting there.
And I do not won't to be the IT guy, I had to put that on the last one as it was for a specific job. That is why I talked about doing some computer work at "Marlins", even though it is "Marlins Automotive" and 99% of my work is Auto related.

And yes this is a work in progress, and that is why I am asking for opinions.


Thanks

 

[SuepaFly]

Try using the Word templates for resumes, they are much more appealing to the eyes.

PM me if you want to see my resume. I don't have a heavy emphasis on computers or anything either since most of the positions I apply for are in entry-level business jobs.

 

[DorkBoy]

Hey:Q

I'm from Wilmington, NC