That's the first step to getting suckered. Every sucker out there thinks that his gf is different, he trusts her so she'd never do anything to hurt him. Rrrrright.
He's just a fool who isn't good at predicting things or figuring things out.
That's the first step to getting suckered. Every sucker out there thinks that his gf is different, he trusts her so she'd never do anything to hurt him. Rrrrright.
He's just a fool who isn't good at predicting things or figuring things out.
Nah...Let's say you didn't trust her and kept an eye on everything she did, and that's the only reason she never did anything wrong, you would have only put a band-aid on the problem--not fixed it.
The problem being her being a whore...
in my relationship we have a thing called respect. seeking out romantic/sexual attention from a member of the opposite sex is disrespecting your relationship.
in conclusion, it wouldn't happen to me and if it was i would leave.
in conclusion, it wouldn't happen to me and if it was i would leave.
I say let her know that you're not OK with her doing these things and that you don't think the relationship is going to work out. You're not going to change her and force her to stop hanging out with dudes. And she's not going to magically make you accept it, either.
Dump her and move on. Find someone who sees things the way you do.
KoolAidKid
Golden Member
- Apr 29, 2002
- 1,932
- 0
- 76
I think that there is a positive correlation between willingness to trust your partner and age. Speaking from extensive experience:
If you trust her and she abuses it, the relationship fails.
If you don't trust her the relationship will fail.
If you trust her and she doesn't abuse it, the relationship has a good chance of success.
If your goal is to have a long-term relationship that works, trust is the only option that has a possibility of success. If your goal is to prevent yourself from experiencing pain and betrayal, then a lack of trust might be best for you.
agreed...even if it's not romantic or sexual attention....seeking any type of attention from the opposite sex other than you would be considered disrespectful.
if your S.O. is willing to make the relationship work (that being the premise) then he/she should be able to make a compromise in his/her going out until the late hours of the night even if it doesn't happen on a daily/weekly basis.
not meaning that he/she should completely cut off his/her friends, but set realistic boundaries that would satisfy both parties, not because his/her S.O. demanded it to be that way or set boundaries and limited his/her actions FOR him/her, but because he/she CHOSE to do so for the sake of the relationship. i agree nothing should be forced upon. that never works. force and suppression is only bandaid solutions.
one can go out and spend time with friends but be sensible about not disrespecting your partner in such a way that he/she would feel disrespected even if YOU don't think so.
obviously the other partner should let go or work on these trust issues as well, but at the same time you shouldn't exasperate or push this even more to make his/her trust problem worse. being in a relationship means working together, not saying to your partner "your problem is your problem, you work on it or i'll leave," all under the assumption that it is a serious relationship, not just a fling.
it should be out of respect and willingness to work on the problems...
if the relationship is set on serious grounds/foundation, there is such a thing called compromise. you don't just throw out a relationship out the window because you don't like certain things about that person when on the most part you guys are very much compatible, unless there are things that can't really be worked on (if your partner cheated on you and such).
just because insecurities (trust issue and attention seeking) exist within this particular relationship, it doesn't mean it should be completely thrown out the window.
effort and perseverance is a rarity nowadays.
RelaxTheMind
Platinum Member
- Oct 15, 2002
- 2,245
- 0
- 76
Maybe im just not insecure as you folks on here. i go out to clubs/bars/travel all the time but i dont cheat on my girl (i own a record label/production company). i may talk w/ and hang out with other girls but beyond all temptation ive become a stronger person.
so... i guess it comes down to the person. ive hung with people that use that "different area code" rule...you know its not cheating as long as your in a different area code.
RTM
so... i guess it comes down to the person. ive hung with people that use that "different area code" rule...you know its not cheating as long as your in a different area code.
RTM
KoolAidKid
Golden Member
- Apr 29, 2002
- 1,932
- 0
- 76
There's also this thing called respect, OP's gf need to also respect OP. The gf partying with a lot of male friends especially knowing that he has a trust issue is an indication that she has little respect for him. Most male that claim to be a friend of a female mostly have 1 thing in common, they are expecting something more. Granted that the gf may not thinking about cheating but she is an attention wh0re and not respecting her bf.
That's true, it's not a funny subject.
Seriously, ~50% of marriages in this country end in divorce. The odds are not in your favor if your wife is out late at night without you. You don't need a degree in Partical Physics to figure that equation out.
OMG! You couldn't be serious; could you? :disgust: Now it looks like there's a bigger issue here with someone being easily jealous or controlling. I wouldn't have a problem sending any guy out the door if he came with the mentality that any type of attention from the opposite sex other than himself would be disrespectful. I don't like control freaks!
When was it ever common place? In the old days if a woman was hanging out and partying that late, she would get bitch-slapped quite a few times and thrown out on her ass. If a man did it, it was fine. I'm sorry but if this is indeed happening to you, you are definitely getting played like a b!tch. I would never let my woman do this kind of stuff.
You're a numbnutz for even asking if you know this. If someone tells you this upfront, you have no REASON to trust them. Hell, it's the reason why I broke up with my SO. She kept on relying on previous boyfriends for things if I wasn't immediately able to help.
Gosh...
Numbnutz.. I like that word.. numbnutz..
It's like knucklehead but better.
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