How do you become witty?

TridenT

Lifer
Sep 4, 2006
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Have a super depressing life full of tragedy and failed trials. And then get angry. Real angry.
 

Markbnj

Elite Member <br>Moderator Emeritus
Moderator
Sep 16, 2005
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www.markbetz.net
Read Winston Churchill's biography and ponder his awesomeness.

Obnoxious woman: "Sir Winston, if you were my husband I would poison your tea!"
Churchill: " Madam, if I were your husband I would drink it!"

That's wit. The ability to process conversations rapidly and find entertaining things to inject into them.
 

kyrax12

Platinum Member
May 21, 2010
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Read Winston Churchill's biography and ponder his awesomeness.

Obnoxious woman: "Sir Winston, if you were my husband I would poison your tea!"
Churchill: " Madam, if I were your husband I would drink it!"

That's wit. The ability to process conversations rapidly and find entertaining things to inject into them.

So reading a lot would make a person more witty?

What novels/books do you recommend?
 

phucheneh

Diamond Member
Jun 30, 2012
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'Witty' is a result of inborn personality traits. Namely, quick thinking and the predilection for reflexively saying often-inappropriate things.
 

HamburgerBoy

Lifer
Apr 12, 2004
27,111
318
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Self-confidence +1. I remember in a silly general biology lab thing, 24 samples of fake bodily fluids were given to students, one or two of which were infected with the AIDS. This, of course, resulted in many sexual innuendos. Then at some point, the lab TA said the lights might need to go off to see the results of our fluorescent ELISA assays. I immediately thought "Shouldn't the lights have gone off while we swapped samples?" and then two seconds later, the funny guy in the lab said the exact same thing and everybody laughed and two other people even repeated the joke. I cried.
 

OCNewbie

Diamond Member
Jul 18, 2000
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'Witty' is a result of inborn personality traits. Namely, quick thinking and the predilection for reflexively saying often-inappropriate things.

Like improv comics, they say the first thing that comes to mind. It's about having as small of a filter on your thoughts as possible, or none at all.
 
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BoomerD

No Lifer
Feb 26, 2006
66,271
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If you aren't already witty, you may never get there.

IMO, it's not so much about not having a filter at all, but rather about having a selective filter...knowing what to say and when.

It's not something that can really be taught...but to a point, it IS something that can be learned...by being with/around other witty people and by life experience.

You won't get witty by reading books, although they may expand your knowledge of witty quips and come-backs...but you still have to learn when and why to use them...and when to NOT use them.
 

OCNewbie

Diamond Member
Jul 18, 2000
7,596
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I mean a filter is there for a good reason.

Wouldn't it be good to think before speaking?

I'm referring to a filter specifically in regards to being witty.

"Funny" is not clearly defined. Sometimes I say things that I didn't find all that funny (but somewhat funny at least) but then others found hilarious. Maybe I debated a moment whether I should say it at all, since I didn't find it that funny. That's the kinda filter I'm talking about: debating whether you should say something because you're unsure if it's worthy of sharing, or something along those lines. To be as close to an honest representation of yourself as possible (flaws and all), it's best to have a very small filter, because then people's admiration or disdain for you will at least be close to authentic (based on who you actually are, not on your potentially flawed assessment of what society will allow you to be).