How do I talk to white people about the weather?

[OdiN]

This thread is racist.

 

[BoomerD]

Take your pick of any of the following:

Maybe white people don't want to talk to you about the weather...ever think of that?

Maybe white people bring up the weather as a way of avoiding any other conversation with you?

Maybe you're just being an oversensitive moron who is lacking in basic social skills.

 

[MegaVovaN]

It's pretty nice here. Soon summer will get even worse, burning all.

Texas weather FTW. Humidity is still very low now, woot.

 

[theeedude]

Bash the weather man, if it's raining , say the TV guy said it was going to be sunny.

 

[MegaVovaN]

Originally posted by: senseamp
Bash the weather man, if it's raining , say the TV guy said it was going to be sunny.

A: Weather is so nice man
B: Damn TV man promised wind and cold rain
A: ...

 

[91TTZ]

Originally posted by: Throwmeabone
I've noticed how much white people talk about the weather after seeing that come up on Yes Dear. I also realized that I suck at making weather-related small talk. For example, sometimes coworkers will say to me, "It's beautiful outside isn't it?" All I can think of to say is, "Yeah, it's nice." I need more ideas about what to say. It's strange for me because I don't really think about the weather at all.

You need to say the things that whitey likes to hear. Let me give you some examples:

1. It's good if it's sunny out, and they all like to go out in the sun.
2. Their pale skin can't handle the sun, so you need to throw in a comment about getting burned or using sunblock.

 

[theeedude]

Originally posted by: MegaVovaN

Originally posted by: senseamp
Bash the weather man, if it's raining , say the TV guy said it was going to be sunny.

A: Weather is so nice man
B: Damn TV man promised wind and cold rain
A: ...

Usually by that time I am done getting my coffee. 😀

 

[91TTZ]

You may be better off acting like Trucky in Pootie Tang.


Coworker: "You know it's hot out!"
You: "Yeah, and it's hot, too"
Coworker: "That's what I just said- it's hot out"
You: "Yeah I know, I'm just saying that it's hot out, too.

 

[Perknose]

Next up: Casual sports related replies for the clueless.

 

[conehead433]

We sure need some rain.

 

[glenn beck]

reminds me of this sketch

Lame Weatherman: So this low pressure systme is going to be very active. We're ognna have a cold front that's gonna push through - it's really gonna result in some precipitation, so you may want to bundle up and put on your galoshes..

Announcer: Are you tired of little boys trying to talk like weatherman, telling you what the weather may or may not be? Then turn to News 4's John-John Mackey and his Storm Tracker Accu-Cast. John-John doesn't just tell you about the weather. He grabs that bastard weather and pounds it into little, pathetic shards. Then shoves those shards into your pink, puffy face.

John-John Mackey: I'll get you inside the storm! I'll let you live the storm, be the storm! And then, baby, I'll make you love that storm Froggy-Style!

Announcer: So, if you want to hear vague forecasts full of hot air - watch someone else. But for Storm Tracker in Accu-Cast, turn to John-John Mackey, who will fill every hole you've got with the latest breaking weather! So, when you want to know what storm is breaking, count on John-John Mackey to lasso the storm, take it apart, and show you how sad it really is.

John-John Mackey: When I see a storm front coming, I'm all, "What's up, bitch?!" And the storm is all, "Not, much, Sir." And I'm all, "That's right, bitch! Now, go make me a sandwich!" And you want that kind of confidence in your weatherman!

Announcer: "Confidence." So, for earlier warnings, more accurate forecasts, count on News 4's John-John Mackey and his Storm Tracker Accu-Cast! When the weather leaves its house, John-John bangs its wife. "Confidence."

John-John Mackey: Weekdays, 7 and 11, Channel 4 Pulse News. Be there!

 

[KeithTalent]

It sounds as if you shouldn't really be talking to anyone.

KT

 

[preslove]

I talk a lot about the weather here in London because it's so damned shitty and unpredictable. Once, it was sunny as I walked into a shop and spent 10 minutes in there, but by the time I walked out it was fucking snowing :|

& why is everybody so uptight?

 

[EagleKeeper]

How would you talk to black/yellow/red/purple people about the weather?

 

[rbV5]

Just make it Rhyme bro. Whitey's lub dat!

 

[jjzelinski]

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: Throwmeabone
I've noticed how much white people talk about the weather after seeing that come up on Yes Dear. I also realized that I suck at making weather-related small talk. For example, sometimes coworkers will say to me, "It's beautiful outside isn't it?" All I can think of to say is, "Yeah, it's nice." I need more ideas about what to say. It's strange for me because I don't really think about the weather at all.

this thread should be locked. just on the basis of flamebaiting alone, and likely was started in response to the other douchebaggery of the recent thread asking if mentioning watermelon around black people makes you racist. 😕

This has to be the explanation, because otherwise the OP is retarded.

 

[m1ldslide1]

I used to get stressed about it when I was an angst-ridden teenager. "Why do people all talk about the weather? I could give a shit about the weather! Everybody is so much stupider than I am" and so on. Then you grow up a little and appreciate the role that effective small talk plays, especially in a work environment.

 

[ObiDon]

Originally posted by: MegaVovaN

Originally posted by: senseamp
Bash the weather man, if it's raining , say the TV guy said it was going to be sunny.

A: Weather is so nice man
B: Damn TV man promised wind and cold rain
A: ...

a: "i say, old chap, i do believe that i will no longer take the advice of the previously indicated forecaster"

 

[Throwmeabone]

Originally posted by: jjzelinski

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: Throwmeabone
I've noticed how much white people talk about the weather after seeing that come up on Yes Dear. I also realized that I suck at making weather-related small talk. For example, sometimes coworkers will say to me, "It's beautiful outside isn't it?" All I can think of to say is, "Yeah, it's nice." I need more ideas about what to say. It's strange for me because I don't really think about the weather at all.

this thread should be locked. just on the basis of flamebaiting alone, and likely was started in response to the other douchebaggery of the recent thread asking if mentioning watermelon around black people makes you racist. 😕

This has to be the explanation, because otherwise the OP is retarded.

I didn't expect that. 😕

This is a legitimate, although admittedly light-hearted thread. It's not a parody, and it's not meant to be racist. You guys are just thinking too much into it.

Anyway, there have been some good suggestions so far. Thanks.

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: Throwmeabone

Originally posted by: jjzelinski

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: Throwmeabone
I've noticed how much white people talk about the weather after seeing that come up on Yes Dear. I also realized that I suck at making weather-related small talk. For example, sometimes coworkers will say to me, "It's beautiful outside isn't it?" All I can think of to say is, "Yeah, it's nice." I need more ideas about what to say. It's strange for me because I don't really think about the weather at all.

this thread should be locked. just on the basis of flamebaiting alone, and likely was started in response to the other douchebaggery of the recent thread asking if mentioning watermelon around black people makes you racist. 😕

This has to be the explanation, because otherwise the OP is retarded.

I didn't expect that. 😕

This is a legitimate, although admittedly light-hearted thread. It's not a parody, and it's not meant to be racist. You guys are just thinking too much into it.

Anyway, there have been some good suggestions so far. Thanks.

Here's another suggestion: Never ask a tall person (white, black, yellow, red, or blue), "HOW'S THE WEATHER UP THERE?!" They really don't like that.
Hope that helps.

 

[zeruty]

Wow, it's hot out. I think I am gonna go get a nice juicy slice of watermelon.

 

[1sikbITCH]

I don't initiate small talk at all. I say Hi, good to see you, and that's it. Small talk is for people who are uncomfortable with the awkward silence. I rather enjoy it.

I also will never ask you how you are doing, because frankly, I don't care and I'm not going to insult you by making you perform tricks on my command. Nobody really wants to know the answer to "How are you." Occasionally I'll get really annoyed with that question and come off with something like "Oh, I've got bleeding hemorrhoids and haven't been able to shit in a week. How about that weather?"

 

[Mo0o]

Originally posted by: 1sikbITCH
I don't initiate small talk at all. I say Hi, good to see you, and that's it. Small talk is for people who are uncomfortable with the awkward silence. I rather enjoy it.

I also will never ask you how you are doing, because frankly, I don't care and I'm not going to insult you by making you perform tricks on my command. Nobody really wants to know the answer to "How are you." Occasionally I'll get really annoyed with that question and come off with something like "Oh, I've got bleeding hemorrhoids and haven't been able to shit in a week. How about that weather?"

Wow you sound like a delight to be around. It's amazing how people rationalize their antisocial behavior. If you dont like small talk that's fine, but there's no need to be an ass to someone who's just trying to make some innocent conversation.

 

[imported_Mike]

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: Throwmeabone

Originally posted by: jjzelinski

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: Throwmeabone
I've noticed how much white people talk about the weather after seeing that come up on Yes Dear. I also realized that I suck at making weather-related small talk. For example, sometimes coworkers will say to me, "It's beautiful outside isn't it?" All I can think of to say is, "Yeah, it's nice." I need more ideas about what to say. It's strange for me because I don't really think about the weather at all.

this thread should be locked. just on the basis of flamebaiting alone, and likely was started in response to the other douchebaggery of the recent thread asking if mentioning watermelon around black people makes you racist. 😕

This has to be the explanation, because otherwise the OP is retarded.

I didn't expect that. 😕

This is a legitimate, although admittedly light-hearted thread. It's not a parody, and it's not meant to be racist. You guys are just thinking too much into it.

Anyway, there have been some good suggestions so far. Thanks.

Here's another suggestion: Never ask a tall person (white, black, yellow, red, or blue), "HOW'S THE WEATHER UP THERE?!" They really don't like that.
Hope that helps.

I've never been asked that, but odly enough, I do get asked if I get asked how the weather is up here.

 

[Mo0o]

Originally posted by: Mike

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: Throwmeabone

Originally posted by: jjzelinski

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: Throwmeabone
I've noticed how much white people talk about the weather after seeing that come up on Yes Dear. I also realized that I suck at making weather-related small talk. For example, sometimes coworkers will say to me, "It's beautiful outside isn't it?" All I can think of to say is, "Yeah, it's nice." I need more ideas about what to say. It's strange for me because I don't really think about the weather at all.

this thread should be locked. just on the basis of flamebaiting alone, and likely was started in response to the other douchebaggery of the recent thread asking if mentioning watermelon around black people makes you racist. 😕

This has to be the explanation, because otherwise the OP is retarded.

I didn't expect that. 😕

This is a legitimate, although admittedly light-hearted thread. It's not a parody, and it's not meant to be racist. You guys are just thinking too much into it.

Anyway, there have been some good suggestions so far. Thanks.

Here's another suggestion: Never ask a tall person (white, black, yellow, red, or blue), "HOW'S THE WEATHER UP THERE?!" They really don't like that.
Hope that helps.

I've never been asked that, but odly enough, I do get asked if I get asked how the weather is up here.

Do you get asked about being asked about people asking you how the weather is up there? Because that just happened.