How do I get over a girl?

[manlymatt83]

I was in love with her for three years. We broke up a few weeks ago, she left still saying she loved me and missed me but wanted to see other people because she "knew I was the one for her but couldn't stay with me knowing I was her only boyfriend". She called me 3:45 AM saturday morning to tell me she loved me and then got on a plane and is now gone for 5 months, and I can't talk to her.

I'm really really upset. I love this girl. I'm 22 and we dated since I was 20.

My attitude right now is that I have three goals: 1) Lose weight, 2) Graduate, 3) Pay off my debt. And that keeps me going. But I think about how happy she made me and how close we were and how best friends we were, and yeah there were problems ... but I'm just scared and can't imagine someone else without her (and can't imagine ME not with her.... I hung out with her the two days before she left (Thursday and Friday) and we were soooo happy, and she almost said she wanted to stay together but kept saying she knows she would have doubts).

It just hurts :-(

PIC from when we were happy: http://mj.atopia.net/scratch/mandh.jpg
^ I'm about 30 pounds skinnier than that now.

 

[Kadarin]

The only way to get over a girl in any reasonable timeframe is to get another girl.

 

[hypn0tik]

That sucks dude.

The best way to get over a girl is another girl.

Edit: Bah, Astaroth33 beat me to it!

 

[jumpr]

Originally posted by: mjuszczak
she left still saying she loved me and missed me but wanted to see other people because she "knew I was the one for her but couldn't stay with me knowing I was her only boyfriend".

Translation: she's getting boned by another guy.

Sorry.

 

[spaceman]

time.

 

[BigB10293]

beer

 

[purbeast0]

basically it sounds like she was starting to get interest in someone else. if she truly loved you and knew you were the one for her, she would have stayed with you.

time will make it heal ... so will going out and getting with some other hot chicks. you wouldn't imagine how quickly hooking up with another girl will get your mind off of your ex. been there, done that.

 

[EngenZerO]

beer... lots of it...

also couple in mingling by going out to bars and meeting girls while drinking beer... and lots of it...

 

[manlymatt83]

Don't tell me she was cheating on me or interested in someone else, because she wasn't. Her and I were each other's first and we were intimate before she left, and we've NEVER lied to each other and I trust her. We went out to dinner and we told each other that we loved each other and I asked her if she was interested in anyone else and she said not at all.... its just that she's very tied to her parents, she's tired of her parents telling her to move on and see other people, and she has these doubts ever since her and I started "fighting" a few months ago (which we later fixed).

 

[Kadarin]

Originally posted by: hypn0tik
That sucks dude.

The best way to get over a girl is another girl.

Edit: Bah, Astaroth33 beat me to it!

By a full minute! You're slowing down...

 

[buzzsaw13]

Originally posted by: mjuszczak
I was in love with her for three years. We broke up a few weeks ago, she left still saying she loved me and missed me but wanted to see other people because she "knew I was the one for her but couldn't stay with me knowing I was her only boyfriend". She called me 3:45 AM saturday morning to tell me she loved me and then got on a plane and is now gone for 5 months, and I can't talk to her.

I'm really really upset. I love this girl. I'm 22 and we dated since I was 20.

My attitude right now is that I have three goals: 1) Lose weight, 2) Graduate, 3) Pay off my debt. And that keeps me going. But I think about how happy she made me and how close we were and how best friends we were, and yeah there were problems ... but I'm just scared and can't imagine someone else without her (and can't imagine ME not with her.... I hung out with her the two days before she left (Thursday and Friday) and we were soooo happy, and she almost said she wanted to stay together but kept saying she knows she would have doubts).

It just hurts :-(

What a load of crap, you're better off without her.

 

[spaceman]

how old are you?

 

[slightlyhuman]

hey bro, if it's meant to be, things will fall into place. persistence(sp?) pays off.


time is the only thing unforunately. alcohol is a temporary fix so remember that.

 

[Zap Brannigan]

Originally posted by: buzzsaw13

[

What a load of crap, you're better off without her.

 

[slightlyhuman]

Originally posted by: ncircle
how old are you?

I'm really really upset. I love this girl. I'm 22 and we dated since I was 20.

 

[NathanBWF]

It just takes time dude. That's all. I'm going through the same thing right now. Always try to keep your head up and stay positive. Getting all depressed isn't going to help you, trust me. There is no point in wasting part of your life all depressed, it's too short for that. Pick yourself backup and move on, damn you're younger than I am. You have lots of time left to meet knew people...

 

[Trikat]

You guys had to lie to each other atleast once during the relationship!!!

 

[manlymatt83]

Well the problem is that we're still in contact. She's going to be emailing me and calling me from where she is (I'll leave a little bit of anonymousity in this) and so even if I push her completely out of my mind, she'll bounce back in again. And like I said, she told me she loved me before she left ... she said if she wasn't leaving she would have wanted to work on things... so yeah, maybe she's hooking up with people while she's gone... but I know she loves me, and I don't think her feelings will change so quickly, but I have yet to hear from her to see what's going on. I know I need to pull away, because she even admitted to me that she wouldn't be able to be with me without seeing what else is out there (which I told her I understood). She just made me SO happy.... it sucks :-( She made me so incredibly happy and to this day does. There will be no one like her out there, I know it.

 

[Cooler]

Originally posted by: Astaroth33
The only way to get over a girl in any reasonable timeframe is to get another girl.

QFT this has worked for me before

 

[jumpr]

nevermind.

 

[DaShen]

The only thing that will heal it is time and friends.

Hang out with your buddies more and give it time.

 

[Baked]

Cheap hookers.

 

[manlymatt83]

Originally posted by: DP
hey bro, if it's meant to be, things will fall into place. persistence(sp?) pays off.


time is the only thing unforunately. alcohol is a temporary fix so remember that.

This is actually a response that makes me feel somewhat good. And I think (correct me if I'm wrong) I have a better shot at getting back with her if I focus on my three goals (losing weight, better health, graduate, no debt, etc.) so that this May when she comes home, I'm ahead of the game, and if she wants to be together again awesome, and if not, at least I accomplished a lot.

She left knowing that I loved her. AND she brought memories of us with her: pictures of us kissing, etc. So I Know she still cares, and if she finds someone out there who makes her happier than I did, good for her... I love her and I want her to be happy. But I wish I could be with her.

 

[manlymatt83]

Originally posted by: ncircle
how old are you?

22. I live on my own, work full time and go to school (but only have one semester left). She lives at College but still with her parents, so our lives are a bit different.

 

[Rudee]

That line she fed you "knew I was the one for her but couldn't stay with me knowing I was her only boyfriend".. that's a crock of $hit. She simply grew tired of the relationship and wants to move on. If a woman truly wants you in her life, she will overcome all obstacles to keep the relationship in tact, otherwise, they'll give you some sappy line like the one she gave you, have herself a good cry, then move on to something new and exciting. Your relationship with her is just another chapter in the big book of life. Time to end that chapter and begin a new one. She is, so I suggest you do the same.