how do I deal with a CHEAP bf?

[BD2003]

Hehehe its about time the tables were turned. I love double standards.

Although this is reality, and double standards exist, so accept them.

Nothing short of telling him not to be so damn cheap anymore is going to change it.

 

[aznmist]

Originally posted by: pyonir
dump him and date some geek off of AT. they have lots of money to spend on computer parts, so a few dollars on you shouldn't be a problem.

good luck.

 

[BatmanNate]

Get an expensive girlfriend.

 

[bozack]

How old are you two anyway??

$200 in debt is really nothing...heck with my car loan and my CC bills I am close to 18,000 in the hole....not to mention what I pay in rent/utils every month...

But I disagree with the concensus, he can be changed...however he A. Needs a better paying Job, and B. needs to learn that Life is no fun if your too much cheap all the time...least from my experience it isnt...


good luck

 

[yakko]

Ebay him.

 

[Linux23]

order a t-bone steak dinner, eat it in front of him and belch out loud. afterwards say, "nothing burps better than steak! how's your water?"

 

[Orsorum]

Originally posted by: Linux23
order a t-bone steak dinner, eat it in front of him and belch out loud. afterwards say, "nothing burps better than steak! how's your water?"

I like that, actually... 'cept for the belching part.

 

[djheater]

Love is not love which alters when it alteration finds, nor bends with the remover to remove.

 

[NickelTitanium]

you don't deserve to date a guy like this. it sounds like he is too cheap to live life. plus putting money into an account is not good, unless there is growth in that account. CD or something... anyhow, if this is not your lifestyle then leave him. just like someone else said, it only gets worse. there is not such thing as being cheap now and not later.

 

[Skyclad1uhm1]

Originally posted by: Skoorb

Originally posted by: m2kewl

Originally posted by: Jimbo
OK, Make him pay for sex. Same diff.

Wait! Wouldn't that technically make her a <insert here>???

Now that's wrong.

The only difference between whores and girlfriends is that with girlfriends instead of money it's in the form of movies and dinners.

--

I didn't say that.

For girlfriends you have to pay all the time.

 

[bonk102]

dont buy him a damn thing, first off, if the kid can't take care of himself, how the hell is he supposed to take care of you?

second, not wanting to spend money on food? but he'll buy chips and crap like that? sounds like a dumb ass to me (no offense because you are dating him after all)

and finally. Cut him off from any and all sexual activity until he begins to "treat you better", he'll get the drift.

it sucks that some guys do not know how to treat a gf and make the rest of us look bad

 

[xirtam]

This is the first time he's on his own. I'd give him some space and see if he can figure out his finances.

You'd rather deal with a cheapskate than a spendaholic. At least he won't be driving you into debt.

I say give him some time. He'll come around. Man shall not live on chips alone... (boy am I a hypocrite... well, I do have oreos too.)

 

[dude]

Originally posted by: Koing

Originally posted by: Ameesh I have this rule about girls. If she doesn't offer to pay for something by the 5th time I see her then I am not going to bother and call her again. She can come chase me as I don't care and am not prepared to care for a girl that doesn't 'offer' to pay. I don't have to take the offer but its a good sign if she offers to pay.

What if she has no job? And lost her hands in an accident? Is mute? Blind? Deaf? How would she offer to pay then?

 

[toant103]

STOP PAYING FOR HIM

 

[Turkey]

Don't try to dig him out of his financial holes... he will just keep digging them. Plus his priorities are f*cked. Who "saves" at the expense of buying food, especially when $200 is a relatively large amount of debt? I'm a totally cheap guy... when I lived by myself one summer I lived in the worst apartment in the 2nd worst house on the block in the worst part of the town by the train tracks, and bought the cheapest bike I could find ($30!) for transportation, didn't eat out at all, kept track of the # of hours I used on those "500 free hours of AOL" CDs, only turned on the A/C when it hit 100, and ate hot oatmeal for breakfast every morning because it was the cheapest breakfast food I could find even though it was 90 degrees out. The canister lasted about 3 weeks, but I spent about $40/week for food, and always had fresh fruits & veggies, bread, deli meats, non-frozen chickens, and pasta. Lots of pasta. It was the only thing I spent money on. Get him to take a "basic personal finances" course, and if he doesn't change, dump him. That would indicate he has bigger problems than being cheap.

 

[Que-TiP]

Originally posted by: Ameesh
you know the interesting thing is we wouldnt be soo hard on a girl if the situation was reveresed.

This is a good point. Who cares who is the man and who is the woman. As long as he is somewhat appreciative, then its worth it. If his wierd psycho savings plan bothers you that much, say something. If he doesnt change, then you can think about leaving or whatever. When I go out with a girl, I like to pay as long as she appreciates it. If she wants to pay, thats fine too. Money is paper. Sharing is caring.

-Alex

 

[spanky]

the way to deal with a cheap bf is to get a rich bf

 

[Farmall]

Your bf has no pride from my POV. Quit buying him anything unless you seriously want to, the old "I'm hungry and I don't have money other than my life savings" doesn't go very far.

IMO he sounds like one of those welfare cases that will be on the payroll until someone quits writing the checks.

You sound like a nice gal and I bet he would hate to lose you. Why don't you let him see this thread and read all the positive comments that have been posted.

 

[lunchldyd]

i think the fact that he is not willing to spend any money on dates (which is for the both of you), much less on you, is indicative of his not caring enough about your feelings. a person who is like this does not usually change. misers are misers; do you really want this for the rest of your life even if everything else with him goes well?

 

[lawaris]

just 1 question ?

has he been like this all the time you people have been together ? or is it a recent phenomena ?

 

[dude]

Uncle Scrooge.

That's what he's saving up for!

 

[Nitemare]

Sonds like a real loser, dump him and get a real man

preferably an ATer, they at least have money and would treat you right..

1. Eats only chips and cereal(Chips and cereal aren't the cheapest) ramen baby.....
2. Mooches off everybody(nothing wrong with that, unless you value others opinions of you and have no problem with other people constantly talking about you behind your back and no one ever wanting to do anything with you, because you are a cheapskate)
3. Invests his life saving in a checking or savings account(IRA, CD, Index fund..hell the guy that lives in a van down by the river knows better than that)
4. Downloads movies off Mirc.(How lame can you get, the res is crap, the time spent downloading is too long..Blockbuster has a deal where you can rent one get one free on certain days..DVD quality for a couple of bucks vs time spent downloading, $hitty quality and electricity used by the computer to download it)

I regret to inform you that your bf is stoopid

Tell him your issues, if he doesn't remedy his problems tell him someone else will.

What do you see in this guy anyways?

 

[ragazzo]

Ally, don't buy food for him. If you're going to buy food for him, buy Ramen Instant noodle soup packages. They are dirt cheap and fills him up.

 

[ragazzo]

Originally posted by: Ally24k
well he thinks very far off into the future. like he says his life savings is for after graduation like buying a house, a car, etc. so he has a bank acct that he does not touch for any reason and puts a little bit of money in each paycheck. he'd rather be in debt (now he's in debt almost 200 dollars) than touch that acct. i'd like it if the relationship were equal where we take turns paying for stuff and we spend relatively the same amount of money. but now it seems that i am forking over the cash a lot more because he wont touch his money. for me, i dont have a life savings acct because i never save up enough money because i end up having to pay for so many things. but i care for him so much and i feel like he's someone i will have a long future with. so does his cheapness not matter because he's looking out for the future?

in that case, sit his bum down and have a good talk with him. if he refuses to cooperate, then don't buy him anything or pay for anything. just pay for yourself when you two go out. if he still doesn't pay for himself, then dump him. ragazzo24k sound good to you?

 

[virusag11]

I have a different idea from other folks here. I had the same problem your boyfriend has, but I changed my ways when I finally asked my mom how to teach me to shop. I am a college student and live on my own, so money is kinda thin, but I was embarrassed that when my friends came over their was nothing to eat. So my mom took me to the grocery store whenever she went for a month and taught me how to shop smart. She also taught me how to store food properly so they won't spoil. Now I always have stuff to eat at home, but I still have my favorites.

BTW if he was a real cheap bastard he would be eating ramen, because we all know ramen is 15¢ a package. May want to try teaching him how to shop instead of forcing him to buy stuff, then you will just piss him off. He should feel lucky he has a nice GF like you, I had to consult my mom for help (which my friends make fun of, f**kers).