How can you repel bad feelings when they come? Do you look forward to something, vent, cry?

[Sephiroth_IX]

Im in a pretty low state right now, and i dont know how to make the feelings go away. I want to cry, but i cant. I want to break things, but that would solve nothing. I do not know how to be happy... Some people just are happy, plain out... I envy them. If i had one wish, it would simply be to be a happy person... I show like i am extremely happy on the outside, but thats just a shell. Deep down i feel horrible... And i cant stop it. Im listening to music right now, and its hardly helping.

I dont know how to stop this "fsck it" attitude. I used to strive for perfection. Now i could care less. I look at the word "cant" above, and it drives me nuts. I want to change it to "can't" but there is something in my head telling me that i shouldnt care. My grades are absolutely horrible in school. Freshman year i had straight a's. I know all the subject matter, but I do not care enough to do the work. Even when i push myself, i do work, turn it in, and then i am beyond tired due to the work needed and can hardly process normal functions. I never want to do anything, i just want to lie here and never apply myself to anything anymore - and its sickening. I want to be successful, i want to work hard, but i cannot make myself do it.

I'm so sad... and it wont leave. Its here. It's a burden i cannot throw. I try and try and try to "make a concious effort" to be happy. It doesnt work, because after the effort i just end up with more pain and frusteration.

I have absolutely no reason to be unhappy. I dont know if you guys will understand this. I have everything i need financially, i have all the material items i want... I have a mother that loves me dearly. Theres nothing *missing.* I just dont get it. I cant stop the unhappiness...


I guess this is just a post trying to vent, ask for help, i dont even know. I just dont see anywhere else to turn...

 

[Farbio]

i understand how you feel seph, i really do. i'm applying to med school right now and its hard many times to sit down and actually do the work, i mean its there, i know i can do it, but i just can't make myself do it. i know i should, and i used to know its what i wanted to do with my life, but now i question it alot and i wonder if i'll even make it into med school, so y should i bother applying if i don't think i'll actually make it? and what do i do about the apathy that i have towards everything, etc...you sound a lil worse than me i have to admit, and maybe u should really go see someone, just someone to talk to that deals with these things often. i know that i have days that are just crappy, but oftentimes, days can be me made alot brighter by just little things i've found. its the little things that make the crappy things u have to do so much nicer, and you just have to find those little things that make things better for you. maybe its just really late, and maybe i'm just rambling, but i hope i said something of some value in there, and let us in ot, or me, if you want to talk, know

 

[Shuxclams]

this is going to sound really stupid........"let go." Now what that means for me is to do exactly what the hell is in front of me, like wake up, eat, shower, go to work (school if thats the case) do me work, eat lunch......etc...... Sounds really bad and drull, its not about excitement and fun at the moment, its about getting out of this funk. Try and help someone less fortunete, someone who needs help with school work, someone who needs a ride to something, talk to someone who's feeling depressed, do things for others and do the things you can do now. Just My $0.02





SHUX

 

[Farbio]

u know, shux has a very good point there....helping someone always make u feel better about any problems in your life, and it always make u realize that whatever problems you're having, someone is having worse problems, maybe that's y i do youth counseling....it always makes me feel a whole lot better about myself

 

[Sephiroth_IX]

Thanks guys... Ill try...

I just feel like giving up. I just want to quit everything... I want to quit school, i want to throw away everything, i want to just stop doing anything productive, period... hopefully this is just another spell, and it will leave in a couple weeks... then i will be merely complacent, but thats much better than where i am now.

I do see what you have written, and i do appreciate your help. Thanks, gents

 

[Shuxclams]

Seph, Thats what I am saying about "do whats in front of you", work through it and have 'faith" that it will be/get better. cause it will.




SHUX

 

[NicColt]

Sephiroth I know exactly what you mean man, I'm going through that right now it's not easy. It's like PMS for men. excetp that it last a little longer, jee woman have it soooo easy.

 

[Shudder]

Adopt a pet from a local shelter.

Hell, go running. Write a book, read a book. Go do karoake or something. Drink a lot of caffeine.

Have you gained any weight lately? Putting on some extra pounds adds to depression and causes more. I've gained 20 pounds in the last 2 years and it affects about everything. Luckily I was thin before, but still, it changes the way your body and mind works.

 

[Wangel]

Porno will give you a temporary relief from these problems. Just don't become addicted.

 

[Viperoni]

I used to be like that about 2 months ago.
You just need a bit of a break, loosen up a little.
You're being hard on yourself.
Striving for perfection is good, but no one is perfect.
We just do the best we can.

Just give yourself a little time, things always get better over time, kinda like wine