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how big was your wedding?

Gibson486

Gibson486

Lifer
How big was it?

Mine looks like it is going to be small. (14 people, all family). Knowing this, it looks like we do not have to spend all of our money on food and the rental hall.

Also, how much am I looking at for a photographer?
 
90 people, like 12 in the wedding party. Small is good, you get to actually hang out with everyone.

Pro Tip: Plan a decent gap between the Church/ceremony and the reception, long enough to take pictures before cocktail hour starts. Being there for your own cocktail hour is the single best wedding plan you can make. It's the most fun part of most weddings, you might as well be there for yours.
 
wait....you mean people who attend the actual wedding do not always attend the party after (with a band and everything)?

I did not want lots of people because I did not want to spend money on the food during the party. It's something like $120 a head and for every 12 people, you need to spend another $160 for a server.

Or am I missing and event in between?
 
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I'm getting hitched in Oct. There'll be about 75 people and I think the cost is in between 13-15k in total for me.
 
About 11 people - backyard wedding. That was more people than I wanted but you have to have witnesses for it to be legal, so might as well allow a few more people to come.
 
Gibson486 said:
How big was it?

Mine looks like it is going to be small. (14 people, all family). Knowing this, it looks like we do not have to spend all of our money on food and the rental hall.
Click to expand...

Mine was small -- about the same number of people, maybe a few more. Definitely under 20.

Also, how much am I looking at for a photographer?
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Depends on what you order, but make sure you OWN the photos they take. Many will take pictures and then retain ownership of the photos, meaning you pay them for prints. I think we paid $800 and we got full ownership of everything, a print of each photo in a binder (several hundred photos), and all of them on DVD as well.
 
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IndyColtsFan said:
Mine was small -- about the same number of people, maybe a few more. Definitely under 20.



Depends on what you order, but make sure you OWN the photos they take. Many will take pictures and then retain ownership of the photos, meaning you pay them for prints. I think we paid $800 and we got full ownership of everything, a print of each photo in a binder, and all of them on DVD as well.
Click to expand...


WTF??? Man...if I went through all that and they told me I did not own the photos....I would be heading to jail the next day!
 
Ours was in a historical church which only seated 50 people, so it worked out nicely.

Reception was at my parents house, photography done by my cousin, cake and flowers by a family friend.
 
IndyColtsFan said:
You can do much less than $13K. We spent around $5K IIRC and most of that was the reception with open bar. :awe:
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No, the ceremony is not the issue. the places I found were in Boston were all less than $1000 and some even have a "requested donation" instead of a set price. The reception though...dam....people can get into serious debt with those prices.
 
First one was bride, groom, two witnesses, and a JP. Price was about $50 including dinner for the witnesses.

Second one (we got married twice, no divorce or anything just married twice) was bride, groom, best man, maid o' honor, preacher, and family. About 80 people in all. We wanted to have a potluck but the mother of the bride insisted that that would be tacky and hired a caterer (family member as well). I have no idea what the bill was but definitely under 5k probably closer to 2k. The videographer was a friend of the family who offered his services as a wedding present.
 
Gibson486 said:
No, the ceremony is not the issue. the places I found were in Boston were all less than $1000 and some even have a "requested donation" instead of a set price. The reception though...dam....people can get into serious debt with those prices.
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I just counted and I think we had 16 people. Our reception was around $3500 IIRC. That included a dinner with either filet mignon or chicken marsala, salad, sides, the room, and open bar (beer and wine) along with a bartender. It was at a Sheraton and they also threw in our suite that night. Check hotels and the packages they offer to save money. Ours was awesome and the food was outstanding. Definitely not cheap but with a small number of attendees, manageable.
 
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Gibson486 said:
How big was it?

Mine looks like it is going to be small. (14 people, all family). Knowing this, it looks like we do not have to spend all of our money on food and the rental hall.

Also, how much am I looking at for a photographer?
Click to expand...

Be honest, you're one of those people without too many friends, not that there's anything wrong with it (maybe).
 
Zeze said:
Be honest, you're one of those people without too many friends, not that there's anything wrong with it (maybe).
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no, if I invite one person, then another one has to be invited or they will feel "left out". Then there is the "+guest". Then there are kids you have to accommodate. Yeah, it will turn into a 100 person reception fast. at around $120 a head for food, it's not cheap.
 
Gibson486 said:
no, if I invite one person, then another one has to be invited or they will feel "left out". Then there is the "+guest". Then there are kids you have to accommodate. Yeah, it will turn into a 100 person reception fast. at around $120 a head for food, it's not cheap.
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Yep, you have to draw the line. If I had my way, it would've been just immediate family and my wife's best friend as her bridesmaid, but she invited an aunt, uncle, and a couple of friends and I invited one additional friend as well. Some of her other aunts and uncles weren't invited and they found out and made snotty comments, but oh well....

I absolutely HATE weddings. I was just glad to get it over with and get to the booze, food, and the evening's entertainment. 😉
 
Gibson486 said:
wait....you mean people who attend the actual wedding do not always attend the party after (with a band and everything)?

I did not want lots of people because I did not want to spend money on the food during the party. It's something like $120 a head and for every 12 people, you need to spend another $160 for a server.

Or am I missing and event in between?
Click to expand...

After the ceremony, there is usually a cocktail hour before dinner. Basically, the bar opens, everyone gets hammered for an hour, and then you sit down to dinner. It's not seated, so everyone can say hello, talk, etc. It's a lot of fun, I really suggest doing it, because you and your guests can walk around, talk, etc. There are usually passed hors d'oeuvres (pronounced whores-doovers, trust me) and a bartender, so if you have to pay servers for the night you can keep them working.

Ask your reception venue if it's built into the cost. If you're doing it at a hotel or something that is specifically a reception hall, it's probably already planned.

I will also add this - I get that it's financially rough to throw a wedding. But whatever you do, get all of the people you want to have and invite them. Have the party somewhere cheaper if you have to, but don't cut guests that you really want to have. It is a really rare occasion to have all of those people together in one place, and it is a really memorable experience. I got married two years ago and our friends and relatives still bring it up and talk about how great it was, not for anything we did, but for the fact that everyone was together.
 
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sjwaste said:
After the ceremony, there is usually a cocktail hour before dinner. Basically, the bar opens, everyone gets hammered for an hour, and then you sit down to dinner. It's not seated, so everyone can say hello, talk, etc. It's a lot of fun, I really suggest doing it, because you and your guests can walk around, talk, etc. There are usually passed hors d'oeuvres (pronounced whores-doovers, trust me) and a bartender, so if you have to pay servers for the night you can keep them working.

Ask your reception venue if it's built into the cost. If you're doing it at a hotel or something that is specifically a reception hall, it's probably already planned.
Click to expand...

Yep, the cocktail hour is a good time. The reception I mentioned earlier also included that in the cost.
 
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