How acceptable is it to request a female trainer at the gym?

[Syborg1211]

I've been training for the past 8 months with a female trainer who I have had a very professional relationship with. Before I started training, I had never once been on a treadmill or stairmaster and knew very little about nutrition and weight training. She taught me a great deal, and I've gone from 208 lbs 24% body fat to 185 lbs 12% body fat during this time period.

I felt very comfortable with her for various reasons. I think the main thing is that I grew up with 3 older sister and no brothers so I am just more comfortable talking and interacting with females than males. I also realize that impressing the pretty trainer is a motivating factor - one which is nothing more than this because I am a married man. The relationship with a trainer is a rather intimate one where you have to share many things about your life with them that affect your training - stress, diet, reasons why you couldn't work out sometimes (hungover), and I feel more comfortable talking about all these things with a woman.

So now my trainer just got engaged to a wealthy man so she doesn't need to work anymore. She's been trying to help find me a new trainer, and I told her that I would prefer a female trainer. I just told her I felt more comfortable with a female trainer and didn't really expand on the reasons why. She ended up leaving my number to a male trainer, and I'm having difficulty finding the words to tell him I wanted a female trainer. My friend told me it was inappropriate to ask for a female trainer and it makes me look like a perv. Is this what all trainers think when a guy says he wants a female trainer?

 

[highland145]

After 8 months, you don't need a trainer.

Heck, you've got us. Just ask away.

 

[ZOOYUKA]

It just seems silly to worry about the sex of a trainer. Shouldn't you be more worried about the knowledge and the ability of the trainer to help you achieve your goals?

It sounds like you know your way around the gym now and have made great progress! Get over your insecurities and keep pushing yourself!

 

[Onita]

I can't see how it would be too awkward if you explained it the way you did on here. They'll try to make you comfortable if they want the money.

 

[IHateMyJob2004]

After 8 months, you don't need a trainer.

Heck, you've got us. Just ask away.

/thread

 

[Syborg1211]

I can't see how it would be too awkward if you explained it the way you did on here. They'll try to make you comfortable if they want the money.

Thanks for addressing my question. I guess I'll explain my reasons when I make my request.

As for the rest, I have some friends saying the same thing, but I like having guidance and someone to keep me accountable. With my trainer, we never did the same exact same exercise twice, and I really enjoyed the variety. I didn't ask if I needed a trainer though, so please try to stay on topic.

 

[Bateluer]

.

Heck, you've got us. Just ask away.

Uh, go with the professional. Most people on AT are arm chair experts who don't know their ass from a hole in the ground.

 

[highland145]

Uh, go with the professional. Most people on AT are arm chair experts who don't know their ass from a hole in the ground.

Separating the chaff from the wheat is part of the job. No different than IRL with a "professional" anything.

 

[surfsatwerk]

What you want are called "strippers" and you seek them out at the "nooodie bar".

 

[Syborg1211]

Only a single response addressing my original post? I expected better, ATHF. I suppose there's not actually any women or trainers on here who could give my question a real answer.

 

[KidNiki1]

Well, i didn't respond initially because ZOOYUKA said pretty much the same thing i would have said.

as i woman, i prefer to hang out with/chat/get along better with guys. so, i can see your point, sort of, for personal interactions but if your goal is weight training, then the gender of your trainer, in my opinion, is irrelevant. when i am sick, i don't ask for a male doctor because i get along better with dudes.

consider it a mental challenge to have personal interactions with someone you would not normally choose, in this case a male trainer. if you insist on having a female trainer, then i suspect there is a bit more to the "I also realize that impressing the pretty trainer is a motivating factor" part of your reasoning, and that, my friend, *is* a bit creepy.

 

[Syborg1211]

Well, i didn't respond initially because ZOOYUKA said pretty much the same thing i would have said.

as i woman, i prefer to hang out with/chat/get along better with guys. so, i can see your point, sort of, for personal interactions but if your goal is weight training, then the gender of your trainer, in my opinion, is irrelevant. when i am sick, i don't ask for a male doctor because i get along better with dudes.

consider it a mental challenge to have personal interactions with someone you would not normally choose, in this case a male trainer. if you insist on having a female trainer, then i suspect there is a bit more to the "I also realize that impressing the pretty trainer is a motivating factor" part of your reasoning, and that, my friend, *is* a bit creepy.

This is exactly what I was looking for. Thank you!

You raise a very good question about what my goals are, and that's something I have to evaluate. I'm not trying to get huge or anything. I'm just looking to stay generally healthy and fit so that I don't run into the health problems that my sedentary parents are having now. So I want a trainer who will keep things fun for me through exercise variety as well as make my time enjoyable at the gym by providing a "workout partner" (I put that in quotes since I know the trainer isn't working out with me and is focused on my safety as well as progression). I realize that a male could provide all these things though so I should keep evaluating my issues with them, but I do know that I am wholly more afraid of disappointing a woman than a man in most things I do.

With regards to the creepiness of wanting to impress the pretty trainer, I think most guys would admit that they work a bit harder when attractive women are around them at the gym. I figured this would be something that female trainers are fully aware of and know is part of their appeal to many males. Sure it may be a little creepy, but this is the world we live in. I also know for a fact I've never once had inappropriate thoughts or made any unprofessional comments to my trainer.

 

[KidNiki1]

i was mostly joking about the creepy part.

So I want a trainer who will keep things fun for me through exercise variety as well as make my time enjoyable at the gym by providing a "workout partner" (I put that in quotes since I know the trainer isn't working out with me and is focused on my safety as well as progression).

Ask yourself this with regard to the above quote: What if you get a new female trainer, and she does NONE of those things your former female trainer did?

It is entirely possible that your former trainer was a person you just happened to get along with. And who happened to be a woman. Just a thought.

Whatever you decide to do, good luck!

 

[blackdogdeek]

this question will not sound serious but it is:

what if they gave you an unattractive female trainer?

 

[Syborg1211]

If I got a female trainer and we did not get along, then I would request a new female trainer.

If I ended up with an unattractive female trainer, I'd definitely prefer that over a male. In fact, I would say that is the most likely scenario since there is only maybe one or two female trainers out of 10 that I find are good looking.

 

[Miramonti]

If that's what works for you, make sure you get it. Every personality is different tho, so make sure it's a female you can communicate with and that motivates you to have strong workouts etc. That should be the case with any trainer.