HI WUT UP HOW U DONG?!!!???

[neonerd]

ISNT IT AWFULY NIEC 2 HAEV A PENIS
ISNT IT FRIGHTFULY GOD 2 HAEV A DONG
ITS SW3L 2 OWN A STIFY
ITS DEVIEN 2 OWN A DIK
FROM TEH TINEIST LITLA 2DGAR
2 TEH WORLDS GREAETST PRIK
SO 3 CHERS FOR UR WILEI OR O THOMAS
HURAY1111 OMG LOL FOR UR ONA-3YED TROUSAR UR P3IEC OF UR WIEFS BST UR POSY OR UR U CAN WRAP IT UP IN U CAN SLIP IT IN UR SOK
BUT DONT TAEK IT OUT IN PUBLIC
OR THEY WIL STIK U IN DA DOK
AND U WONT.111!!!!!!!!111111!1 COMA.!1!11!!111!1 BAK

 

[mwtgg]

Originally posted by: neonerd

ISNT IT AWFULY NIEC 2 HAEV A PENIS
ISNT IT FRIGHTFULY GOD 2 HAEV A DONG
ITS SW3L 2 OWN A STIFY
ITS DEVIEN 2 OWN A DIK
FROM TEH TINEIST LITLA 2DGAR
2 TEH WORLDS GREAETST PRIK
SO 3 CHERS FOR UR WILEI OR O THOMAS
HURAY1111 OMG LOL FOR UR ONA-3YED TROUSAR UR P3IEC OF UR WIEFS BST UR POSY OR UR U CAN WRAP IT UP IN U CAN SLIP IT IN UR SOK
BUT DONT TAEK IT OUT IN PUBLIC
OR THEY WIL STIK U IN DA DOK
AND U WONT.111!!!!!!!!111111!1 COMA.!1!11!!111!1 BAK

O U BASTARD U ADIETD DA POST!!11!1!1 WTF

 

[JulesMaximus]

My dong is fine thank you.

 

[thirdlegstump]

I dun needz no tranzlata 4 dat kinda sh*t son

 

[mwtgg]

Originally posted by: JulesMaximus
My dong is fine thank you.

Ooooooooh you touch my tra lala, mmmmmmm my ding ding dong.

 

[RaynorWolfcastle]

Shakespeare been an AOLer...

TWO HOUSAHOLDS BOTH ALEIK IN DIGNITY
IN R V3RONA WH3R3 WE LAY OUR SCEN3
FROM ANCAINT GRUDG3 BR3AK 2 NU MUTINY
WHERA CIVIL BLOD MAAKS CIVIL HANDS UNCL3AN!!1!!!!1!!1!!!!!!!!!!111!1 WTF OMG WTF LOL
FROM FORTH T3H FATAL LOINS OF THESA TWO FO3S
A R OF STAR-CROSD LOVARS TAEK TH3YRE LEIF
WHOS3 MISADVANTUR3D PEI2US OVARTHROWS
DO WIT TH3YRE DEATH BURY THEYRE PA3RNTS STREIF111!!1!!!! OMG WTF
DA F3ARFUL PASA3G OF THEYRE D3ATH-MARKD LOV3
AND DA CONTINUANCE OF THEYRE PA3RNTS RAEG
WHICH BUT THEYRA CHILDRANS 3ND NOUGHT CUD R3MOVA
IS NOW TAH TWO HOURS TRAFIC OF OUR STA3G
TAH WHICH IF U WIT PAETINT ARS ATAND
WUT H3R3 SHAL MIS OUR 2IL SHAL STREIV 2 MAND111

 

[bigredguy]

THIS TRANSLA2R WIL TAEK WUT U WRIET IN IT AND TURN IT IN2 TEH MANAR A 12-YAAR-OLD AOLAR WUD WRIET IT!1!1!111 LOL TYPE IN WUT U WANT TRANSLAETD AND THEN CLIK DA BUTON

 

[datalink7]

FOUR SCOR3 AND S3VAN YEARS AGO OUR FATH3RS BROUGHT FORTH UPON THIS CONTIENNT A NU NATION CONC3IEVD IN LIEBRTY AND D3DICAETD 2 DA PROPOSITION TAHT AL MEN R CRAAETD EQUAL
NOW!!!!1 OMG WTF LOL WE R ANGAEGD IN A GR3AT CIVIL WAR!1!11!1 LOL !1!1!11! OMG TESTNG!!111 OMG LOL WHETHAR TAHT NATION OR ANY NATION SO CONCAIEVD AND SO D3DICAETD1!!1!1! OMG WTF LOL !!1!1! OMG LOL !1!!1 CAN LONG ENDURE!!!11 LOL W3 R MET ON A GREAT BATL3FEILD OF TAHT WAR
W31!!!!1 OMG LOL HAEV COM3 2 D3DICAET A PORTION OF TAHT FEILD AS A FINAL RASTNG PLAEC FOR THOS3 WHO H3RE GAEV THEYRE LIEVS TAHT TAHT NATION MIGHT LIEV!!1!!111 OMG LOL IT IS AL2GATHER FITNG AND PROPER TAHT W3 SHUD DO THIS
BUT!!11!!! OMG LOL IN A LARGER S3NS3 WA CANOT D3DICAET!!1!!1 OMG WTF LOL 11!!!!!1 OMG W31!!1!1! OMG WTF CANOT CONS3CRAET!!!11!1 LOL 111! WTF 1!!!1111 WTF LOL WE CANOT HALOW THIS GROUND111!!1!! WTF TEH BRAEV MEN LIVNG AND DAAD WHO STRUGLAD HER3 HAEV CONS3CRAETD IT FAR ABOVA OUR POR POWER 2 AD OR DATRACT!!!11 WTF TEH WORLD WIL LITLA NOTE NOR LONG RAMEMBR WUT W3 SAY H3RE BUT IT CAN NEVER FORG3T WT DID HERE
IT1!!111!1 OMG IS FOR US DA LIVNG RATHER 2 B DEDICAETD HAR3 2 TEH UNFINISHED WORK WHICH THAY WHO FOUGHT HERA HAEV THUS FAR SO NOBLY ADVANCED1!!!1! IT IS RATH3R FOR US 2 B HAR3 DEDICAETD 2 DA GREAT TASK RAMANENG BFOR3 US11!! WTF LOL !!!111 LOL TAHT1!1!1 LOL FROM THES3 HONORAD D3AD W3 TAEK INCRAAESD D3VOTION 2 TAHT CAUSA FOR WHICH THAY GAEV TEH LAST FUL MEASUR3 OF DEVOTION!1!! 1!!1 OMG LOL 1!!1 WTF TAHT WA H3RA HIGHLY R3SOLV3 TAHT TH3S3 DEAD SHAL NOT HAEV DEID IN VANE!1!11! OMG LOL !!11!11 OMG !!11!! WTF TAHT THIS NATION UND3R GOD SHAL HAEV A NU BIRTH OF FREDOM!1!11 LOL 1!1!! 1!!!1!1 OMG AND TAHT GOVERNMENT OF DA PEOPLE!11!1! OMG !!1!1!! WTF BY!!1!11 OMG WTF LOL TEH P3OPLA!!111! OMG WTF LOL 111!1 OMG LOL FOR111! OMG WTF DA PEOPL31!!1!1! WTF 1!!1 OMG 1!!!!1!! WTF SHAL NOT PERISH FROM TEH 3ARTH1!1!11 OMG WTF

 

[SelArom]

DA R OF TEH LENGTH OF TEH HYPOT3NUSE OF A TRIANGLA IS 3QUAL 2 DA SQUAERS OF TEH LENGTH OF DA OTHER TWO SIEDS11!11 WTF

 

[FrustratedUser]

BST REPOST AV3R!11!111!11! OMG WTF

 

[Tylanner]

JAENT.1!!!1!1!!111!1!1!! OMG WTF LOL (SHORT PAUSE CAUSE MAH MIND BLANKAD).!!!!111!!1!1!1! OMG WTF LOL UM IMM GONA TRY SOMETHNG NOW BUT IF U DONT LIEK IT LET ME KNOW11!!1! MA

UH OK.!!!!11111!111!!11!1! WTF LOL HER

STIK OUT UR BUT111!!1 LOL ME



CH3WBACA IS A WOKIEE FROM DA PLAENT KASHYYK BUT CH3WBACA LIEVS ON TEH PLAENT 3NDOR1!!1!1! WTF LOL NOW THINK ABOUT TAHT!1!!1! OMG WTF TAHT DO3S NOT MAEK S3NSA1!1!!!1! WTF U MUST ACQUIT1!1!1 OMG LOL

 

[FrustratedUser]

Originally posted by: Tylanner
JAENT.1!!!1!1!!111!1!1!! OMG WTF LOL (SHORT PAUSE CAUSE MAH MIND BLANKAD).!!!!111!!1!1!1! OMG WTF LOL UM IMM GONA TRY SOMETHNG NOW BUT IF U DONT LIEK IT LET ME KNOW11!!1! MA

UH OK.!!!!11111!111!!11!1! WTF LOL HER

STIK OUT UR BUT111!!1 LOL ME

LMFAO

 

[InlineFive]

THIS IS ABOUT DA MOST STUPID THNG I HAEV AVER SEN ON DA INTERN3T!1!1 OMG )

 

[timswim78]

The first three paragraphs of the "State of the Union."

MR!!1! OMG LOL SP3AEKR VIEC PRESIEDNT CH3N3Y MEMBRS OF CONGRAS DISTNGUISH3D CITIEZNS AND FELOW CITIEZNS EVARY YAAR BY LAW AND BY CUS2M WA MET HERE 2 CONSIEDR DA STAET OF DA UNION!1!1! WTF LOL THIS YEAR WE GATHER IN THIS CHMBR DEPLY R OF DACISIEV DAYS TAHT LEI AEHAD
PRASIEDNT1!!111 OMG WTF LOL G3ORGA W11!!! OMG BUSH HANDS VIEC PRASIEDNT DIK CH3NEY AND SP3AEKR OF DA HOUSE DENIS HAST3RT (NOT PICTURED) A COPY OF HIS STAET OF DA UNION ADRAS UPON HIS ARIVAL 2 DA HOUSE CHMBR AT DA US!!1!! WTF LOL CAPI2L TUESDAY JAN1!1!! 28 203!!!111 OMG WTF WHIET HOUSE PHO2 BY 3RIC DRAEPR U AND I S3RVE OUR COUNTRY IN A TIEM OF GREAT CONS3QU3NCE!!!1!1!! LOL DURNG THIS SASION OF CONGRES WE HAEV DA DUTY 2 R3FORM DOMASTIC PROGRMS VITAL 2 OUR COUNTRY WA HAEV TEH OPORTUNITY 2 SAEV MILIONS OF LIEVS ABROAD FROM A TARIBLA DIESAES1!!1 OMG LOL WE WIL WORK FOR A PROSP3RITY TAHT IS BROADLY SHAERD AND WA WIL ANSWAR EVERY DANGAR AND 3VERY MAH TAHT THRAAETNS DA MERICAN P3OPLE1!!1 OMG WTF LOL (APLAUSA)
IN1!1!1 OMG AL TH3SE DAYS OF PROMIES AND DAYS OF REKONNG WA CAN B CONFIEDNT1!111 OMG WTF LOL IN A WHIRLWIND OF CHANGA AND HOP3 AND PERIL OUR FATEH IS SURA OUR RESOLV3 IS FIRM AND OUR UNION IS STRONG!!!!!!1 OMG WTF LOL (APLAUSE)
THIS!!!1! OMG WTF COUNTRY HAS MANY CHALANGES11!!!! OMG WE WIL NOT DENY W3 WIL NOT IGNOR3 W3 WIL NOT PAS ALONG OUR PROBLAMS 2 OTHAR CONGRESAS 2 OTHAR PRESIEDNTS AND OTH3R GENERATIONS11!1!!!! (APLAUSE)1!!1!! WTF LOL W3 WIL CONFRONT THEM WIT FOCUS AND CLARITY AND COURAEG11!1!!!! OMG

 

[DivideBYZero]

Thanks. Now my eyes have snapped.

 

[djheater]

FOURSCORA AND SEVAN YEARS AGO OUR FATH3RS BROUGHT FORTH ON THIS CONTIENNT A NU NATION CONCEIEVD IN LIEBRTY AND D3DICAETD 2 DA PROPOSITION TAHT AL MEN R CRAAETD EQUAL11111! OMG

haha

already done

 

[hdeck]

THEIR A LADY WHOS SURE AL TAHT GLIT3RS IS GOLD
AND SHES BUYNG A STAREWAY 2 HAAEVN
WH3N!!!1111 OMG SHA G3TS THEIR SH3 KNOWS IF TEH S2RES R AL WIT A WORD SHE CAN GET WUT SH3 CM3 O11!!1!! LOL O AND SH3S BUYNG A STAREWAY 2 THEYRE1!1!111 OMG A SIGN ON TEH WAL BUT SHA WANTS 2 B SURE
CAUSA U KNOW SOMETIEMS WORDS HAEV TWO M3ANNGS
IN!111 OMG WTF A TRE BY TEH BROK THEIR A SONGBIRD WHO SNGS
SOMATIEMS AL OF OUR THOUGHTS R O1!1!!! WTF IT MAEKS ME O IT MAEKS MA THEYRE1!!1! OMG A FELNG I GET WHEN I LOK 2 TEH W3ST
AND MAH SPIRIT IS CRYNG FOR L3AVNG
IN!11!!1! OMG LOL MAH THOUGHTS I HAEV SEN RNGS OF SMOKE THROUGH DA TRES
AND TEH VOIECS OF THOSE WHO STAND O!!!1111 OMG IT MAEKS ME O IT RILLY MAEKS M3 WOND3R
AND!11!!! LOL ITS WHISPAR3D TAHT SON IF WA AL CAL TEH TUNA
THEN TEH PIEPR WIL LEAD US 2 RAASON
AND!!!11 WTF LOL A NU DAY WIL DAWN FOR THOS3 WHO STAND LONG
AND TEH FORESTS WIL ACHO WIT LAUGHTAR
IF!!!!!! OMG THEIR A BUSTLA IN UR HADGEROW DONT B ALARMED NOW
ITS JUST A SPRNG CLEAN FOR TEH MAY QUEN
YAS111!! OMG LOL THEYRE R TWO PATHS U CAN GO BY BUT IN DA LONG THEYRE STIL TIEM 2 CHANGE DA ROAD UR ON
AND11!11!1 LOL IT MAEKS M3 UR!!11 WTF LOL H3AD IS HUMNG AND IT WONT GO IN CAES U DONT TEH PIEPRS CALNG U 2 JOIN HIM
D3AR LADY CAN U H3AR DA WIND BLOW AND DID U UR STAREWAY LEIS ON TEH WHISPARNG WIND
AND1!!1111 LOL AS W3 WIND ON DOWN DA ROAD
OUR SHADOWS TALAR THAN OUR THEIR!1!1 WTF WOKS A LADY WE AL KNOW
WHO SHIENS WHIET LIGHT AND WANTS 2 SHOW
HOW AVERYTHNG STIL TURNS 2 GOLD
AND1111!!! OMG WTF LOL IF U LISTAN VERY TEH TUNE WIL COMA 2 U AT LAST
WHEN111!1 OMG LOL AL R ONA AND ON3 IS AL
2 B A ROK AND NOT 2 ROL
AND!1!! LOL SH3S BUYNG A STAREWAY 2 H3AEVN!!11! LOL

 

[Shawn]

HELO1111! WTF LOL HOW R U?!!?!??? OMG WTF LOL WUT IS UR NME?!!!??!! WTF

 

[Nithin]

ban

 

[Safeway]

this is hilarious

 

[Leon]

They should have submitted this to King George instead....

WE HOLD THES3 TRUTHS 2 B S3LF-EVIEDNT TAHT AL M3N R CRAAETD 3QUAL TAHT THEY R 3NDOW3D BY THERE CR3A2R WIT CERTANE UNALEINABLE RIGHTS TAHT MONG TH3SE R LIEF LIEBRTY AND DA PURSUIT OF HAPIENS!!!!!! WTF LOL -TAHT 2 SECUR3 THESE RIGHTS GOVERNMENTS R INSTITUTAD MONG MEN D3RIVNG THEYRE JUST POWERS FROM TEH CONSANT OF TEH GOV3RNED -TAHT WH3NEV3R ANY FORM OF GOV3RNM3NT BCOM3S DESTRUCTIEV OF THESE 3NDS IT IS DA RIGHT OF TEH PEOPLE 2 ALTER OR 2 ABOLISH IT AND 2 INSTITUTE NU GOV3RNM3NT LAYNG ITS FOUNDATION ON SUCH PRINCIPL3S AND ORGANIZNG ITS POWERS IN SUCH FORM AS 2 THEM SHAL SEM MOST LIEKLY 2 EF3CT THEYRE SAEFTY AND HAPIENS1!1111 OMG WTF LOL PRUD3NC3 INDED WIL DICTAET TAHT GOVARNMENTS LONG ESTABLISHED SHUD NOT B CHANGED FOR LIGHT AND TRANSEINT CAUS3S AND ACORDNGLY AL AXPEREINCA HATH SH3WN TAHT MANKIND R MORE DISPOS3D 2 SUF3R WHIEL EVILS R SUFARABLE THAN 2 RIGHT THAMSALV3S BY ABOLISHNG DA FORMS 2 WHICH TH3Y R ACUS2MED!!!!!11 OMG WTF BUT WH3N A LONG TRANE OF ABUSES AND USURPATIONS PURSUNG INVARIABLY TEH SM3 OBJECT 3VINCES A DESIGN 2 RADUC3 THEM UNDER ABSOLUTE DASPOTISM IT IS THEYRE RIGHT IT IS THERE DUTY 2 THROW OF SUCH GOV3RNM3NT AND 2 PROVIED NU GUARDS FOR THEYRE FUTUR3 S3CURITY111!!11 OMG ?SUCH HAS B3N TEH PATEINT SUFARANC3 OF THESE COLONEIS AND SUCH IS NOW DA NECESITY WHICH CONSTRANES TH3M 2 ALTER THEYRE FORM3R SYSTAMS OF GOVERNM3NT!1!111 OMG WTF DA HIS2RY OF TEH PRESENT KNG OF GR3AT BRITANE [G3ORGE II] IS A HIS2RY OF RAP3AETD INJUREIS AND USURPATIONS AL HAVNG IN DIERCT OBJ3CT DA ESTABLISHM3NT OF AN ABSOLUTE TYRANY OV3R THESE STAETS!!!1 OMG 2 PROVE THIS LET FACTS B SUBMITAD 2 A CANDID WORLD11!!1 OMG LOL

HE HAS R3FUS3D HIS ASENT 2 LAWS TEH MOST WHOLASOME AND NECASARY FOR DA PUBLIC GOD!111! OMG

HE HAS FORBID3N HIS GOVERNORS 2 PAS LAWS OF IMADIAET AND PR3SNG IMPORTANC3 UNL3S SUSPENDAD IN THEYRE OPARATION TIL HIS ASANT SHUD B OBTANEAD AND WHEN SO SUSP3NDAD H3 HAS UTERLY NAGL3CTED 2 AT3ND 2 THEM111111 OMG WTF LOL

HE HAS REFUSED 2 PAS OTHER LAWS FOR TEH ACOMODATION OF LARGE DISTRICTS OF PEOPLE UNL3S THOS3 PAOPLE WUD RELINQUISH DA RIGHT OF RAPR3SENTATION IN DA LEGISLATURA A RIGHT IENSTIMABL3 2 TH3M AND FORMIDABL3 2 TYRANTS ONLY!1!!11 WTF LOL

HE HAS CALED 2GETHER L3GISLATIEV BODEIS AT PLAECS UNUSUAL UNCOMFORTABLA AND DISTANT FROM TEH D3POSI2RY OF THEYRE PUBLIC R3CORDS FOR TEH SOL3 PURPOSA OF FATIGUNG THAM IN2 COMPLIANCE WIT HIS MAASUR3S!1!111 WTF LOL

HA HAS DISOLV3D R3PRESENTATIEV HOUS3S R3PEAETDLY FOR OPOSNG WIT MANLY FIRMNES HIS INVASIONS ON DA RIGHTS OF TEH PAOPLA11!!!! OMG WTF LOL

HE HAS RAFUSAD FOR A LONG TIEM AFTER SUCH DISOLUTIONS 2 CAUS3 OTHARS 2 B 3LACTAD WH3RABY TEH L3GISLATIEV POWERS INCAPABLA OF ANIHILATION HAEV RETURNAD 2 DA P3OPL3 AT LARG3 FOR THERE EX3RCIES TEH STAET REMANENG IN TEH MEAN TIEM EXPOS3D 2 AL DA DANGERS OF INVASION FROM WITHOUT AND CONVULSIONS WITHIN!1!!!!1! LOL

HE HAS 3NDAAVOUR3D 2 PRAVENT TEH POPULATION OF THESA STAETS FOR TAHT PURPOSE OBSTRUCTNG DA LAWS FOR NATURALIZATION OF FOR3IGNERS R3FUSNG 2 PAS OTHARS 2 3NCOURAEG THERE MIGRATIONS HITHER AND RASENG TEH CONDITIONS OF NU APROPRIATIONS OF LANDS1!1!!1!1 OMG WTF LOL

HE HAS OBSTRUCT3D DA ADMINISTRATION OF JUSTIEC BY REFUSNG HIS ASENT 2 LAWS FOR ASTABLISHNG JUDICIARY POW3RS!11!!111 LOL

HE HAS MAED JUDGES DEPANDENT ON HIS WIL ALONE FOR TEH TANURA OF THEYRE OFIECS AND TEH MOUNT AND PAYMENT OF THERE SALAREIS11!!!1!1 OMG

H3 HAS ERACTAD A MULTITUD3 OF NU OFIECS AND SENT HITH3R SWARMS OF OFIECRS 2 HARAS OUR PAOPLE AND EAT OUT THERE SUBSTANC31!!1!1! OMG WTF

HE HAS KEPT MONG US IN TIEMS OF PAAEC STANDNG ARMEIS WITHOUT TEH CONS3NT OF OUR L3GISLATURES!!!!11 OMG LOL

H3 HAS AFECT3D 2 REND3R TEH MILITARY IND3P3NDENT OF AND SUP3RIOR 2 DA CIVIL POWER!1!1

HE HAS COMBIEND WIT OTH3RS 2 SUBJECT US 2 A JURISDICTION FORAIGN 2 OUR CONSTITUTION AND UNAKNOWLEDGAD BY OUR LAWS GIVNG HIS ASENT 2 THERE ACTS OF PRAT3NDED LAGISLATION

FOR QUARTERNG LARGE BODEIS OF ARMAD TROPS MONG US

FOR PROTACTNG TH3M BY A MOK TRIAL FROM PUNISHMENT FOR ANY MURD3RS WHICH TH3Y SHUD COMIT ON DA INHABITANTS OF THAS3 STAETS

FOR CUTNG OF OUR TRAED WIT AL PARTS OF TEH WORLD

FOR IMPOSNG TAEXS ON US WITHOUT OUR CONSANT

FOR D3PRIVNG US IN MANY CAESS OF DA BN3FITS OF TRIAL BY JURY

FOR TRANSPORTNG US BYOND S3AS 2 B TREID FOR PR3T3NDED OFANCAS

FOR ABOLISHNG TEH FRE SYSTAM OF 3NGLISH LAWS IN A NAIGHBOURNG PROVINC3 3STABLISHNG THEIR AN ARBITRARY GOVERNMANT AND 3NLARGNG ITS BOUNDAREIS SO AS 2 RANDER IT AT ONC3 AN EXMPLE AND FIT INSTRUM3NT FOR INTRODUCNG TEH SM3 ABSOLUTE RULE IN2 THESA COLONEIS

FOR TAKNG AWAY OUR CHARTERS ABOLISHNG OUR MOST VALUABLA LAWS AND ALT3RNG FUNDMENTALY TEH FORMS OF OUR GOVARNMENTS

FOR SUSPENDNG OUR OWN LEGISLATURES AND D3CLARNG THAMS3LVES INVASTED WIT POW3R 2 L3GISLAET FOR US IN AL CAESS WUT11!!! WTF

HE HAS ABDICAETD GOVERNMENT HERE BY DACLARNG US OUT OF HIS PROTECTION AND WAGNG WAR AGANEST US!1!1

HA HAS PLUNDARED OUR SAAS RAVAEGD OUR COASTS BURNT OUR 2WNS AND D3STROY3D DA LIEVS OF OUR PAOPL311!1!1!1 OMG WTF

HE IS AT THIS TIEM TRANSPORTNG LARG3 ARMEIS OF FORAIGN MERCANAREIS 2 COMPLAAT DA WORKS OF DAATH DESOLATION AND TYRANY ALREADY BGUN WIT CIRCUMSTANC3S OF CRU3LTY AND PERFIDY SCARC3LY PARALALED IN TEH MOST BARBAROUS AEGS AND 2TALY UNWORTHY DA H3AD OF A CIVILIEZD NATION11111! OMG WTF LOL

H3 HAS CONSTRANE3D OUR F3LOW CITIEZNS TAEKN CAPTIEV ON TEH HIGH SAAS 2 BAR ARMS AGANEST THEYRE COUNTRY 2 BCOME DA AXECUTIONERS OF THERE FREINDS AND BRATHRAN OR 2 FAL THEMSELVES BY THERE HANDS!1!!!!11 LOL

HA HAS EXCIETD DOMASTIC INSURACTIONS MONGST US AND HAS ENDAAVOURAD 2 BRNG ON DA INHABITANTS OF OUR FRONTEIRS DA MARCIELS INDIAN SAVAEGS WHOSA KNOWN RULA OF WARFAER IS AN UNDISTNGUISHAD D3STRUCTION OF AL AEGS S3XES AND CONDITIONS11!1!1!! WTF LOL

IN 3VARY STAEG OF TH3S3 OPRESIONS WE HAEV PATITIONED FOR REDRES IN DA MOST HUMBLE TERMS OUR R3PEAETD P3TITIONS HAEV BAN ANSWER3D ONLY BY R3P3AETD INJURY11!111 OMG WTF LOL A PRINC3 WHOS3 CHARACTAR IS THUS MARKED BY 3VERY ACT WHICH MAY DEFIEN A TYRANT IS UNFIT 2 B DA RUL3R OF A FRE P3OPLE11!1!111

NOR HAEV W3 B3N WANTNG IN AT3NTIONS 2 OUR BRITISH BR3THR3N11111! OMG WA HAEV WARNED TH3M FROM TIEM 2 TIEM OF AT3MPTS BY THERE LAGISLATURA 2 EXT3ND AN UNWARANTABLE JURISDICTION OVAR US!!!!! OMG WTF WA HAEV REMIND3D THEM OF TEH CIRCUMSTANCAS OF OUR EMIGRATION AND SETLEM3NT HARE1111!1!! LOL WE HAEV APAAELD 2 THERE NATIEV JUSTIEC AND MAGNANIMITY AND W3 HAEV CONJUR3D THAM BY DA TEIS OF OUR COMON KINDR3D 2 DISAVOW TH3SE USURPATIONS WHICH WUD IENVITABLY INTARUPT OUR CON3CTIONS AND CORESPONDENC3!!1!11 WTF LOL THEY 2 HAEV BEN D3AF 2 TEH VOIEC OF JUSTIEC AND OF CONSANGUINITY!1!!1 OMG WTF LOL WE MUST THEIR ACQUEISCE IN DA N3CESITY WHICH DANOUNCES OUR SAPARATION AND HOLD THEM AS WE HOLD DA R3ST OF MANKIND 3NAMEIS IN WAR IN PEAEC FREINDS11!1! WTF LOL

WE THEYRE DA RAPRASANTATIEVS OF DA UNIETD STAETS OF M3RICA IN GENERAL CONGRES ASEMBLED AP3ALNG 2 TEH SUPR3MA JUDGE OF DA WORLD FOR DA RECTITUDE OF OUR INT3NTIONS DO IN DA NMA AND BY TEH AUTHORITY OF TEH GOD PAOPLE OF THESE COLONEIS SOLEMNLY PUBLISH AND DECLAER TAHT THASA UNIETD COLONEIS AER AND OF RIGHT OUGHT 2 B FRE AND IND3PENDANT STAETS TAHT TH3Y R ABSOLV3D FROM AL AL3GIANCE 2 DA BRITISH CROWN AND TAHT AL POLITICAL CONECTION BTWEN TH3M AND DA STAET OF GREAT BRITANE IS AND OUGHT 2 B 2TALY DISOLVED AND TAHT AS FRE AND INDAPANDENT STAETS TH3Y HAEV FUL POW3R 2 L3VY WAR CONCLUDA P3AEC CONTRACT ALIANCES ESTABLISH COMARC3 AND 2 DO AL OTHER ACTS AND THNGS WHICH INDAPANDENT STAETS MAY OF RIGHT DO111!!1!1 AND FOR TEH SUPORT OF THIS DACLARATION WIT A FIRM R3LIANCE ON TEH PROT3CTION OF DIVIEN PROVIEDNC3 W3 MUTUALY PL3DG3 2 3ACH OTH3R OUR LIEVS OUR FORTUN3S AND OUR SACRAD HONOR11111!11 WTF LOL DA SIGNERS OF DA DECLARATION REPRAS3NTED DA NU STAETS AS FOLOWS NU HMPSHIER
JOSIAH BARTLET WILIM WHIPLE MATHEW THORN2N O HANCOK SMUAL ADMS O ADMS ROBRT TREAT PANE3 ELBRIDGA GERY

 

[So]

I just tried a passage from act II scene II of Hamlet....I think it's on fire.

KNG
W3LCOM31!!!11 OMG WTF DEAR ROSANCRANTZ AND GUILD3NSTERN
MOR3OVER!11! OMG TAHT WE MUCH DID LONG 2 SE U NED WE HAEV 2 US3 U DID PROVOKE
OUR HASTY SENDNG11!1 OMG LOL SOM3THNG HAEV U HEARD
OF HMLATS TRANSFORMATION SO I CAL IT
SINCE NOR DA EXTERIOR NOR DA INWARD MAN
R3SAMBLES TAHT IT WAS!!1! OMG WTF WUT IT SHUD B
MORA THAN HIS FATHARS D3ATH TAHT THUS HATH PUT HIM
SO MUCH FROM TEH UNDERSTANDNG OF HIMSELF
I CANOT DREM OF I 3NTREAT U BOTH
TAHT BNG OF SO U DAYS BROUGHT UP WIT HIM
AND SINC3 SO NEIGHBOURD 2 HIS U AND HUMOUR
TAHT U VOUCHSAEF UR REST HERE IN OUR COURT
SOM3 LITLE TIEM SO BY UR COMPANEIS
2 DRAW HIM ON 2 PL3ASURAS AND 2 GATH3R
SO MUCH AS FROM OCASION U MAY GLEAN
WHATH3R AUGHT 2 US UNKNOWN AFLICTS HIM THUS
TAHT OP3ND LEIS WITHIN OUR R3M3DY!!!1!! OMG WTF

 

[johnjbruin]

WTH R U TOKNG ABOUT?!?!!! OMG WTF

 

[dc724]

Originally posted by: So
I just tried a passage from act II scene II of Hamlet....I think it's on fire.

 

[johnjbruin]

This is awesome:

if (textArray.indexOf("THERE") != -1)
...if (Math.floor(Math.random() * 100) % 2)
......output += "THEIR";
...else
......output += "THEYRE";
else if (textArray.indexOf("THEIR") != -1)
......if (Math.floor(Math.random() * 100) % 2)
.........output += "THERE";
......else
.........output += "THEYRE";
else if (textArray.indexOf("THEY'RE") != -1)
......if (Math.floor(Math.random() * 100) % 2)
.........output += "THERE";
......else
.........output += "THEIR";