David Brent

Banned
May 26, 2005
541
0
0
Help - I Burned My Girlfriendss Cooter
ok this is what happening,

my parents are out with family friends, and they'll be
back any minute

so i need your help


Heres some background:

see, i volunteer on my sisters softball team (im 22
the girls are 15)

and whatever yea i met this girl, her name is Alison,
and we were

going out for a while. We have alot in common,
sometimes i help her with homework. I helped her on
her english essay

and she still got a D. This is because the teacher is
a prick ...

anywayz


So she came over like an hour ago, and i really want
to lose my

virginity, so i ask her to have sex

*no i cant, its not right* she said, but i told her
*dont worry i know

what im doing, ill be done in like 10 seconds, plus
ill give you 2 n64

games if you say yes*

So I gave her Diddy Kong Racing, and Ken Griffy Jr
Baseball, and then

she goes to my room. Shes a bit confused and scarred.

Then i think to myself - yo I need lube right Cuz i
heard you guys on

the vesti saying you need to lube up her cooter
otherwise it wont fit in

properly.

Ok so i have no lube, but i really want to lose my
virginity - so i

grab some butter from the fridge, but its cold, it
wont melt, so i

mircowaved it for 8 minutes, and then i put it in a
glass and poured it on her cooter, now shes saying i
burned it.

I dont know what to do, my parents are going to be
back any minute and shes crying in the bathroom plz
help you guyz are relly smrat and please help me.

Any idea how to shut her up? Should i give her another
n64 game?
 

tec699

Banned
Dec 19, 2002
6,440
0
0
Originally posted by: David Brent
Help - I Burned My Girlfriendss Cooter
ok this is what happening,

my parents are out with family friends, and they'll be
back any minute

so i need your help


Heres some background:

see, i volunteer on my sisters softball team (im 22
the girls are 15)

and whatever yea i met this girl, her name is Alison,
and we were

going out for a while. We have alot in common,
sometimes i help her with homework. I helped her on
her english essay

and she still got a D. This is because the teacher is
a prick ...

anywayz


So she came over like an hour ago, and i really want
to lose my

virginity, so i ask her to have sex

*no i cant, its not right* she said, but i told her
*dont worry i know

what im doing, ill be done in like 10 seconds, plus
ill give you 2 n64

games if you say yes*

So I gave her Diddy Kong Racing, and Ken Griffy Jr
Baseball, and then

she goes to my room. Shes a bit confused and scarred.

Then i think to myself - yo I need lube right Cuz i
heard you guys on

the vesti saying you need to lube up her cooter
otherwise it wont fit in

properly.

Ok so i have no lube, but i really want to lose my
virginity - so i

grab some butter from the fridge, but its cold, it
wont melt, so i

mircowaved it for 8 minutes, and then i put it in a
glass and poured it on her cooter, now shes saying i
burned it.

I dont know what to do, my parents are going to be
back any minute and shes crying in the bathroom plz
help you guyz are relly smrat and please help me.

Any idea how to shut her up? Should i give her another
n64 game?


ban?
 

Colonel C

Member
May 19, 2005
140
0
0
I'll admit that I really did "laugh out loud" when I read that post. Its obvious that you copied and pasted it and hence the paragraphs are all messed up.

kthxbai
 

Mo0o

Lifer
Jul 31, 2001
24,227
3
76
Repost, and this isn't you, but its still funny. hopefully the real op was joking
 

lokiju

Lifer
May 29, 2003
18,526
5
0
Nice linking there buddy, if you're gonna rip something off you should at least credit where you got it from.

 

David Brent

Banned
May 26, 2005
541
0
0
Originally posted by: blazert40
Nice linking there buddy, if you're gonna rip something off you should at least credit where you got it from.

well if i did that i wouldn't get the peanut gallery all riled up, which is the goal here ;)