Help me get my cat off crack!!

[RayGr]

To all newbee cat owners,cats are known to do all kinds of crazy things,prepare to be amazed
They eat(B.I.G list):
tomatoes,potatoes,lettuce,grass,olives,cucumbers,peaches,bananas,chocolate,cocoa,coffe(with or without milk),watermellons,mellons,etc.(almost all vegetables)
they usually dont like oranges and lemons(the smell especially).
I have seen then play with/on the curtains(don't have one any more),like anything that even remotely resembles a mouse/prey (toilet paper is their favourite).Just about anything that can be eaten/shredded for fun.
I have seen cats jump up 2 meters verically or fall from a third floor balcony (15 meters) and get no injuries.
I have even seen them play with small solid balls of sh*t(yuck!).
They like to torture and play with insects and anything of prey.
Thay usually like to display it afterwards.I have woken up next to a dead locust,to a mouse tail and others..

But the worst of all is the fur.My monitors has some problems and I'm too embarassed to send it for repair,cause for the last 4 years cats have been sleeping ON my monitor when not at home.I can't even start to imagine the amount of fur it has accumulated.

Oh,BTW,male cats mark their territory,so if it starts to smell weird some cat's gonna have have his balls cut off...

Hope now you have an idea of waht awaits you..
(After having grown up with cats(now 20 yrs old) and having lived for at least 5 years with more than 40 of them in an apartment I think I've seen it all..)

 

[Elita1]

Thanks for the advice everyone.
I need to do something quick before I end up throttling him in sheer frustration!

 

[BMdoobieW]

You think your cat is on crack? Not only does mine roll around and twist on the floor, he also likes loitering on top of doors, as you can see here. Scared my sister half to death the first time he did this (that she saw)

 

[nateholtrop]

omg doobie thats messed up haha

nate

 

[BMdoobieW]

<< They like to torture and play with insects and anything of prey. >>

Yep


<< But the worst of all is the fur.My monitors has some problems and I'm too embarassed to send it for repair,cause for the last 4 years cats have been sleeping ON my monitor >>

My cat sleeps/plays on top of our 5 year old Trinitron 17&quot; monitor. He likes looking over the edge at the screen and trying to &quot;grab&quot; the arrow. We've only had him for a year so I guess not enough fur has built up to affect the monitor. I'm just afraid the monitor is going to flip over backwards from his weight. I have pics of this too. Heh heh.

Also, my cat likes water. I was under the impression for the last 20 years that cats don't like water. If I turn on the faucet, he comes running in and jumps up onto the counter. He'll even stick his paw in, and he's been known to walk into the shower.

 

[Blundar]

my old cat tweeker needed to go to rehab
She was raised around ravers...
I got her back in '99 when she was a bout 6 months old, and had her for around 6 months before my best friend adopted her so she would have a safer home with more space to run around.
During the 3 or 4 months she lived in the crazy house she managed to:
-smoke weed daily and scratch you / climb up your clothing if you didn't breathe smoke on her
-eat 1/8 of shrooms left on the kitchen table
-land herself in several K holes from sticking her nose in big piles of K while someone (heh) was bagging it up
-eat 2 sugarcubes of acid either given to her by hippies or lost by other humans

Needless to say, she was pretty crazy. We found that old age and catnip mellowed her out a LOT, as did having her fixed. Cats rule. Craziness is part of the territory. Have fun with your feline and try to avoid giving / allowing them to do drugs. Seeing cats chase birds that aren't there is kinda funny, but they have a tendency to injure themselves on walls and other stationary objects.