Have you ever stomped on a cockroach so perfectly...

[thetxstang]

Have you ever stomped on a cockroach so perfectly that its guts jettisoned out a good foot or so in a nice, juicy stream?

I was preparing to walk inside last night when I noticed a particularly large roach lurking on the side of the front porch. I carefully approached him for the kill. As I got about three feet away, he took off at full speed. I skillfully launched my right foot towards him, and in one fluid motion, I delivered the death blow. There was a satisfying snapping sound as my foot rolled over him from the front of his body to the back. The aforementioned gut stream was so impressive I had to call a buddy of mine to come out and take a look.

Anyone else have a nice cockroach kill story under their belt?

 

[dighn]

thankfully I haven't seen a roach in many many years

 

[LikeLinus]

We keep our house clean. We don't have roaches.

 

[D1gger]

mib/The giant bug from outerspace has now added you to his list./mib

 

[zoiks]

haven't seen any roaches lately.

 

[Jeff7]

No roaches here. My sister did find a really large tomato hornworm once, and decided to drop a small section of 4x4 wood on it. Caterpillar guts spewed out in all directions.

 

[f4phantom2500]

lol, awesome...sometimes we get them out in our garage because of the dog food (i always tell my parents to close the bag after they fill up the bowl, but no...) and out front (trash cans), and if i see them i'll give them a good squish. i don't usually go for squirting guts, i usually just stomp straight down on them to get a nice satisfying *POP* noise, like one of those little sperm looking firecracker things that you throw on the ground (you know the ones). it's so fun because usually there's more than one, so it's like popping the air bubble wrap stuff, only for my feet lol.

 

[Gautama2]

Ive never seen one in my life.

 

[thetxstang]

Originally posted by: LikeLinus
We keep our house clean. We don't have roaches.

I realized, of course, that there would be at least a few underhanded comments like this one when I posted the topic. My wife and I live in a brand new subdivision and there is construction going all around us. Unfortunately, the labor people leave all kinds of food items about when they leave at the end of the day. This, unfortunately, has led to cockroaches and other critters congregating at night to feast on the leftovers.

For the record, we have yet to see a roach in the house, though there have been a number of pesky spiders that seem to want to call our place home. Spiders I don't kill. I scoop them up and transplant them in a nice bush outside. Of course, they probably just scurry back into the house whenever a door is open.

 

[thetxstang]

Originally posted by: Jeff7
No roaches here. My sister did find a really large tomato hornworm once, and decided to drop a small section of 4x4 wood on it. Caterpillar guts spewed out in all directions.

Ah, that reminds me of another story. I was a young lad, about 8 or 9 at the time, and spotted an enormous, black, furry-looking caterpillar making its way across our driveway. Being a tad blood-thirsty that day, I decided to stomp on it. Big mistake! A gigantic, sick-looking green tube of gel shot out of it and had me doing the dry heaves. Served me right for needlessly killing it.

Ever since that day, I've limited my killing strictly to cockroaches. Every other kind of critter that makes its way into my abode is safely captured and put out in the lawn. My kindness has never been extended to cockroaches, for some reason.

 

[beemercer]

No roaches in Massachusetts, thank the lord.

 

[Squisher]

At work I prefer to paint them different colors. It cracks me up seeing them running around days latter.

 

[beemercer]

Originally posted by: Squisher
At work I prefer to paint them different colors. It cracks me up seeing them running around days latter.

Hahaha .