Have you ever hired a hooker/escort?

[soup or man]

Originally posted by: maximus maximus

Originally posted by: soup or man
accidently. some friends and i wound up in "Mimi Spa" in downtown El Cajon (i think) for a massage. We were on vacation. We didn't know that "oriental massage" was ACTUALLY for real. So...3 of the 4 of us got hand jobs from very elderly asian women.

Lol... So were you among the 3?

yes. I've never been so surprised in my life. I was just laying there thinking "man, i wish this lady would stop talking to me, it's hard to respond with my face mashed in this towel." Then all of a sudden she tells me to flip over, disappears for a second, I hear a pumping sound, she comes back, whips off my towel and starts going to town. "YEAH HONEY! OH HONEY! YOU GOT NICE STRONG COCK HONEY!" Did I mention she was late 40s early 50s? I sat up really fast and instantly thought "OH MY GOD, HOW UNPROFESSIONAL OF THIS WOMAN!" Of course I realized seconds later that I was in a whore house.

 

[AMDZen]

Not yet, but it might happen some day

 

[BigLouis]

You mom didn't ask for money until after, that bitch

 

[Kadarin]

Originally posted by: soup or man

Originally posted by: maximus maximus

Originally posted by: soup or man
accidently. some friends and i wound up in "Mimi Spa" in downtown El Cajon (i think) for a massage. We were on vacation. We didn't know that "oriental massage" was ACTUALLY for real. So...3 of the 4 of us got hand jobs from very elderly asian women.

Lol... So were you among the 3?

yes. I've never been so surprised in my life. I was just laying there thinking "man, i wish this lady would stop talking to me, it's hard to respond with my face mashed in this towel." Then all of a sudden she tells me to flip over, disappears for a second, I hear a pumping sound, she comes back, whips off my towel and starts going to town. "YEAH HONEY! OH HONEY! YOU GOT NICE STRONG COCK HONEY!" Did I mention she was late 40s early 50s? I sat up really fast and instantly thought "OH MY GOD, HOW UNPROFESSIONAL OF THIS WOMAN!" Of course I realized seconds later that I was in a whore house.

Late 40s / early 50s is hardly "very elderly".

 

[ruffilb]

This thread is NOTHING w/o sonz!

 

[machintos]

Nope

 

[dabuddha]

Originally posted by: Astaroth33

Originally posted by: soup or man

Originally posted by: maximus maximus

Originally posted by: soup or man
accidently. some friends and i wound up in "Mimi Spa" in downtown El Cajon (i think) for a massage. We were on vacation. We didn't know that "oriental massage" was ACTUALLY for real. So...3 of the 4 of us got hand jobs from very elderly asian women.

Lol... So were you among the 3?

yes. I've never been so surprised in my life. I was just laying there thinking "man, i wish this lady would stop talking to me, it's hard to respond with my face mashed in this towel." Then all of a sudden she tells me to flip over, disappears for a second, I hear a pumping sound, she comes back, whips off my towel and starts going to town. "YEAH HONEY! OH HONEY! YOU GOT NICE STRONG COCK HONEY!" Did I mention she was late 40s early 50s? I sat up really fast and instantly thought "OH MY GOD, HOW UNPROFESSIONAL OF THIS WOMAN!" Of course I realized seconds later that I was in a whore house.

Late 40s / early 50s is hardly "very elderly".

Yeah I know. I was thinking of a grandmotherly type person when he said elderly

 

[drsafety]

Ok, who hires hookers regularly :laugh:

 

[Patt]

Originally posted by: Ipno
I can't use a public toilet, let alone a public vagina.

LMAO ... :beer: to you!

 

[tami]

Originally posted by: Eghck

Originally posted by: Mojoed
Never, nor will I ever.

not even if its sonz70?

i don't think the OP knows sonz70. he joined too recently.

 

[ManSnake]

Say no to sex.

 

[SagaLore]

Originally posted by: soup or man
accidently. some friends and i wound up in "Mimi Spa" in downtown El Cajon (i think) for a massage. We were on vacation. We didn't know that "oriental massage" was ACTUALLY for real. So...3 of the 4 of us got hand jobs from very elderly asian women.

Yea? Enjoy that?

 

[SagaLore]

Originally posted by: soup or man

Originally posted by: maximus maximus

Originally posted by: soup or man
accidently. some friends and i wound up in "Mimi Spa" in downtown El Cajon (i think) for a massage. We were on vacation. We didn't know that "oriental massage" was ACTUALLY for real. So...3 of the 4 of us got hand jobs from very elderly asian women.

Lol... So were you among the 3?

yes. I've never been so surprised in my life. I was just laying there thinking "man, i wish this lady would stop talking to me, it's hard to respond with my face mashed in this towel." Then all of a sudden she tells me to flip over, disappears for a second, I hear a pumping sound, she comes back, whips off my towel and starts going to town. "YEAH HONEY! OH HONEY! YOU GOT NICE STRONG COCK HONEY!" Did I mention she was late 40s early 50s? I sat up really fast and instantly thought "OH MY GOD, HOW UNPROFESSIONAL OF THIS WOMAN!" Of course I realized seconds later that I was in a whore house.

Did you let her finish?

 

[maximus maximus]

Originally posted by: Astaroth33

Originally posted by: soup or man

Originally posted by: maximus maximus

Originally posted by: soup or man
accidently. some friends and i wound up in "Mimi Spa" in downtown El Cajon (i think) for a massage. We were on vacation. We didn't know that "oriental massage" was ACTUALLY for real. So...3 of the 4 of us got hand jobs from very elderly asian women.

Lol... So were you among the 3?

yes. I've never been so surprised in my life. I was just laying there thinking "man, i wish this lady would stop talking to me, it's hard to respond with my face mashed in this towel." Then all of a sudden she tells me to flip over, disappears for a second, I hear a pumping sound, she comes back, whips off my towel and starts going to town. "YEAH HONEY! OH HONEY! YOU GOT NICE STRONG COCK HONEY!" Did I mention she was late 40s early 50s? I sat up really fast and instantly thought "OH MY GOD, HOW UNPROFESSIONAL OF THIS WOMAN!" Of course I realized seconds later that I was in a whore house.

Late 40s / early 50s is hardly "very elderly".

She can be called "elderly" if she took off her artificial teeth to give you a BJ.

The correct term is mature.

 

[Slimline]

Originally posted by: SagaLore

Originally posted by: soup or man

Originally posted by: maximus maximus

Originally posted by: soup or man
accidently. some friends and i wound up in "Mimi Spa" in downtown El Cajon (i think) for a massage. We were on vacation. We didn't know that "oriental massage" was ACTUALLY for real. So...3 of the 4 of us got hand jobs from very elderly asian women.

Lol... So were you among the 3?

yes. I've never been so surprised in my life. I was just laying there thinking "man, i wish this lady would stop talking to me, it's hard to respond with my face mashed in this towel." Then all of a sudden she tells me to flip over, disappears for a second, I hear a pumping sound, she comes back, whips off my towel and starts going to town. "YEAH HONEY! OH HONEY! YOU GOT NICE STRONG COCK HONEY!" Did I mention she was late 40s early 50s? I sat up really fast and instantly thought "OH MY GOD, HOW UNPROFESSIONAL OF THIS WOMAN!" Of course I realized seconds later that I was in a whore house.

Did you let her finish?

Well? lol

 

[PrinceofWands]

No, I skipped the preliminaries and went straight to marrying one. In fairness, I didn't know she did more than strip at the time. My bad.

 

[ponyo]

too many.

 

[randomlinh]

no, all my money goes to my car, school payments, and insurance. a little goes to food too.

 

[Starbuck1975]

Then all of a sudden she tells me to flip over, disappears for a second, I hear a pumping sound, she comes back, whips off my towel and starts going to town

Happy Ending?

 

[13Gigatons]

Originally posted by: PrinceofWands
No, I skipped the preliminaries and went straight to marrying one. In fairness, I didn't know she did more than strip at the time. My bad.

To boldly go were every man has been before and you have to give her 50% of all your asset if you get divorced.

You really got screwed.

 

[PrinceofWands]

Originally posted by: 13Gigatons

Originally posted by: PrinceofWands
No, I skipped the preliminaries and went straight to marrying one. In fairness, I didn't know she did more than strip at the time. My bad.

To boldly go were every man has been before and you have to give her 50% of all your asset if you get divorced.

You really got screwed.

If it was only 50% I might be over it by now...but I had to spend the other 50% getting it down to only 50%. And, being in Washington, kids go with the boobs that suckled them, regardless of reason. 8-(

Hindsight, it's what's for dinner.

Oh well...at least the sex was good.

 

[sonz70]

Not all of us are that bad. Just be picky, and don't be shy, no point, we know what your doing, you know what you are doing, and we do it well. So just smile, pay and have a good time.

 

[Montano]

Originally posted by: Ipno
I can't use a public toilet, let alone a public vagina.

FTW !!!

 

[soup or man]

Originally posted by: SagaLore

Originally posted by: soup or man

Originally posted by: maximus maximus

Originally posted by: soup or man
accidently. some friends and i wound up in "Mimi Spa" in downtown El Cajon (i think) for a massage. We were on vacation. We didn't know that "oriental massage" was ACTUALLY for real. So...3 of the 4 of us got hand jobs from very elderly asian women.

Lol... So were you among the 3?

yes. I've never been so surprised in my life. I was just laying there thinking "man, i wish this lady would stop talking to me, it's hard to respond with my face mashed in this towel." Then all of a sudden she tells me to flip over, disappears for a second, I hear a pumping sound, she comes back, whips off my towel and starts going to town. "YEAH HONEY! OH HONEY! YOU GOT NICE STRONG COCK HONEY!" Did I mention she was late 40s early 50s? I sat up really fast and instantly thought "OH MY GOD, HOW UNPROFESSIONAL OF THIS WOMAN!" Of course I realized seconds later that I was in a whore house.

Did you let her finish?

No! After the initial shock of an old lady (i don't care what you people think. When a women in her late 40s is giving you a hand job, she's OLD!) yankin' on the goods I sat up and said "Ah! Umm! Umm...I'm uhh...I'm good." She told me not to be nervous and to just relax, but I told her "No, I think I'm ok, I think I need to leave." So she got a warm towel and wiped off the lube (that was the pumping sound I heard earlier, industrial sized lube). I fumbled to get my clothes on as quickly as possible and she told me that she needed a tip as I tried to run for my life. I don't know hand job etiquette so I slipped her a Fiver. She told me "Twenty dolla minimum!" But I only had $9 on me. I pictured myself without kneecaps, as they surely had some huge asian muscle in the back. I showed her my empty wallet after giving her my $9 and she looked at me funny and said "Ok, you go!" It was $50 just to get inside for what I thought was a 30 minute massage. The other two guys getting "massages" finished. In fact, one of my friends' whores leaned over and asked him "you want hand job?" before starting with the Oh Honey, Yeah Honey routine. What did he say to that question? "What are my friends having?"

 

[Eli]

no, and I never will.

I could never have sex without love.