Have any of you had to speak at a funeral before?

[Nocturnal]

I just dislike being in front of crowds and speaking, even if it is my grandfathers funeral. I just have anxiety. It's just a minor thing, saying thank you and one brief story about him. However, just thinking about it is making me anxious!

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Update

I just thought I'd update everyone since everyone was so kind to give me advice.

I went ahead with the speech. It went flawlessly. I did not look at anyone. I really just got up there, read what was on my piece of paper and that was it. I did however skip a paragraph due to my uncle adding it to his speech. It went flawlessly as in I did not hiccup or make any ums, ands, and what have yous.

 

[AgaBoogaBoo]

You're not doing it for the crowds, you're doing it for yourself. Just think of it that way and you'll be fine.

 

[sillymofo]

Try to be humorous, and look at it as a celebration of his life, rather than a tragic loss. It's hard, but every one has to go some time, and if he has lived a fullfiling life, then there shouldn't be much grievance.

 

[no0b]

Originally posted by: Nocturnal
I just dislike being in front of crowds and speaking, even if it is my grandfathers funeral. I just have anxiety. It's just a minor thing, saying thank you and one brief story about him. However, just thinking about it is making me anxious!

When I had to speak in a funereal I was anxious and stuff like you and messed up made pauses and it came off like I was emotianly hurt (which I was) but that added to the speach and I got praises to it so dont worry too much

 

[Iron Woode]

Originally posted by: Nocturnal
I just dislike being in front of crowds and speaking, even if it is my grandfathers funeral. I just have anxiety. It's just a minor thing, saying thank you and one brief story about him. However, just thinking about it is making me anxious!

Stop worrying about it.

Relax and have a :beer:

You don't have to give a 20 min lecture with a Q&A after it you know.

Just sum up your feelings and thoughts about him and let it be.

 

[moshquerade]

yes i have had to speak at a funeral before, two in fact. just get up there and know your grandfather would be happy to know you are speaking up for him.

 

[Mo0o]

Dont worry about it, no matter how bad you do, no ones judging you . You're not trying to make sales pitch on a used car here.

 

[PELarson]

Originally posted by: Nocturnal
I just dislike being in front of crowds and speaking, even if it is my grandfathers funeral. I just have anxiety. It's just a minor thing, saying thank you and one brief story about him. However, just thinking about it is making me anxious!

Been there done that(The funeral for my Grandmother). Relax and just let your mind go back over the times you spent with your grandfather. I won't give you the normal advise about picturing everyone in their underwear<CRINGE Aunt Gwen /CRINGE>!

 

[StormRider]

This is something that I dread. I'm hoping it isn't a custom to speak at Chinese funerals ...

 

[Howard]

Originally posted by: StormRider
This is something that I dread. I'm hoping it isn't a custom to speak at Chinese funerals ...

Don't think it is...

 

[Howard]

Just speak from the heart, and if it happens that you have nothing to say, tell them what happened and thank them for coming.

 

[Nocturnal]

To be totally honest, I love my grandfather and I'm sure he'd be proud to see me speak. But it's just I fumble and I've really never ever spoke in front of a crowd or at a service like this. I guess there is a first time for everything. Wish me luck and I pray everything will go good. Thanks for the word of advice. I love this forum.

 

[bootymac]

Originally posted by: StormRider
This is something that I dread. I'm hoping it isn't a custom to speak at Chinese funerals ...

It is. At least at my grandpa's funeral it was. A lot of people went up to speak as a matter of fact

 

[ohtwell]

I've never had to and I'm glad about that.


: ) Amanda

 

[LethalWolfe]

I spoke at a friend's funeral a couple of years ago. I had written down what I wanted to say 'cause I didn't want to forget it. It was significantly harder than I thought it would be. Saying those things really brought home how much my friend meant to me and what he added to my life. I was so upset I only read about 3/4 of what I had written. I just wasn't able to make it thru the whole thing. And after the service I had many people, mostly members of my friend's family whom I did not know, come up and thank me for what I said. If I didn't speak I would have always regreted it.

As others have said just speak from the heart. No one is there to judge you.


Lethal

 

[techfuzz]

Sorry for your loss Nocturnal; I lost my grandfather this past year too and I understand how tough it is for you right now. Talking at the funeral should be your decision, a tribute of sorts to your grandfather. When you get up there, take your time, take a few breaths and say what comes to mind. Say what you feel comfortable saying, what you want to say, not what you think others want to hear. You're not really talking to the other people there, you're talking to him and he's gonna be there with you to help you along.

techfuzz

 

[Nocturnal]

Updated Thanks again for the advice.