God, I hate that feeling like everything is changing

[Flyback]

Ever feel weird (scared, even) by the way life pulls you along?

- Girl I thought I would marry ran off and married another guy. I'm over it but still feels odd.
- Parents are aging, it scares me.
- Don't talk with sister much. No bad blood, just different people. Saw her ~4 times in 2 years. We have very little in common.
- Haven't seen anyone that I went to high school with except one person at the gym. Left high school 7 years ago.
- Many of my relatives died or have been disowned.
- Have "friends" at college but none which I see myself hanging out with after its over.
- College is going to be over soon, and I don't know where the time went.
- Despite having dreams, I really have no clue where I want to be anymore or where I'm going.

I'm not depressed at all. My life couldn't be better in many ways:

- My business ideas are taking off and within 8 months time I'll hire my father out of retirement to manage the business (he will have something to do, we can spend more time together, I trust him more than anyone, and he is the smartest person I know).
- Likely going to get accepted into the university programme I want (will study part time so I can still focus on my business)
- Heading towards amateur bodybuilder status (non-competition/for self only).

Despite these lofty plans, I still feel weirded out by life. Its the whole "unknown" about it all at once given my 20s and being nearing the end of undergrad...

Did your life change this much in your 20s? You get weird by it all and do a Neo "whoa" ?

 

[Amused]

:music:ch-ch-ch-changes...

 

[yosuke188]

Originally posted by: Amused
:music:ch-ch-ch-changes...

:music:Just gonna have to be a different man
Time may change me
But I cant trace time..

 

[her209]

:music:

I'm Gonna Make A Change,
For Once In My Life
It's Gonna Feel Real Good,
Gonna Make A Difference
Gonna Make It Right . . .

As I, Turn Up The Collar On My
Favourite Winter Coat
This Wind Is Blowin' My Mind
I See The Kids In The Street,
With Not Enough To Eat
Who Am I, To Be Blind?
Pretending Not To See
Their Needs
A Summer's Disregard,
A Broken Bottle Top
And A One Man's Soul
They Follow Each Other On
The Wind Ya' Know
'Cause They Got Nowhere
To Go
That's Why I Want You To
Know

:music:

 

[Jeff7]

I guess it's just the time when you're really transitioning from being a kid to being an adult in society's eyes.
I also haven't seen anyone from high school in a long time. I also don't see myself hanging out with anyone I know at college once I graduate - I live over 300 miles away from the college. I'll most likely never see anyone here again, same as high school. (Which actually doesn't help motivate me to make close friends here in the first place.)

But it sounds like, as you say, you are doing fine for yourself. Yes, lots of changes, but they're really unavoidable.

 

[91TTZ]

Just wait until you're out of school, have been working for a while, and nothing seems to change. That's the scary part.

Before you know if, you'll feel no different, but when you see pictures of you and your buddies hanging out in high school/college, the clothes will look outdated, and you realized that you looked like little kids. Then you'll notice that it was 15 years ago.

Scary.

 

[Flyback]

I guess it all comes back to having a plan and realizing your priorities. Then striving to put your priorities in order and sticking to them so you don't drift away from what matters to you.

For me this means family, business, part-time school next year and bodybuilding (in that order).

I'm trying to think of ways I can spend more time with my parents. Besides the business, I am thinking of settling down near them. I love the area they live in, and I don't mind commuting in to school three times a week. Been trying to think of some hobbies or otherwise I could get my parents involved in with me. My father loves cars but never had money for pet projects until his retirement. I'm thinking I might pick something up for us to tinker on. Maybe make a day of it each week--spend my Sundays with my parents and have dinner with em.

Still, this won't get over the "weird" feeling of change but I guess at least what matters in life is still close at hand through the changes.

 

[KoolAidKid]

Originally posted by: 91TTZ
Just wait until you're out of school, have been working for a while, and nothing seems to change. That's the scary part.

Before you know if, you'll feel no different, but when you see pictures of you and your buddies hanging out in high school/college, the clothes will look outdated, and you realized that you looked like little kids. Then you'll notice that it was 15 years ago.

Scary.

QFT. You know you're getting old when you start considering the effects of inflation whenever thinking about the past.

For the OP, it may help if you can learn to appreciate (and even thrive upon) changes in your life. As 91TTZ said, constancy becomes more the norm as you get older. If you are not careful during this phase of your life, 20 years will pass in the blink of an eye. Moral of the story: learn to celebrate change. It makes life much more interesting.

 

[Jfrag Teh Foul]

Originally posted by: KoolAidKid

Originally posted by: 91TTZ
Just wait until you're out of school, have been working for a while, and nothing seems to change. That's the scary part.

Before you know if, you'll feel no different, but when you see pictures of you and your buddies hanging out in high school/college, the clothes will look outdated, and you realized that you looked like little kids. Then you'll notice that it was 15 years ago.

Scary.

QFT. You know you're getting old when you start considering the effects of inflation whenever thinking about the past.

For the OP, it may help if you can learn to appreciate (and even thrive upon) changes in your life. As 91TTZ said, constancy becomes more the norm as you get older. If you are not careful during this phase of your life, 20 years will pass in the blink of an eye. Moral of the story: learn to celebrate change. It makes life much more interesting.

I'm in my mid-thirties and life is still ever-changing... if not more so. Since thirty I have gone from a family of 3 to a family of 5, changed jobs 3 times (I'm an IT guy), built a house for my family, vehicle changes of course, started my own business, my father and I have made amends from my childhood, lost quite a bit of hair...lol (shaving my melon now), can almost grow a beard...lol, and sprouted a few errant hairs on my chest.

If anything, I have learned that the changes never really have stopped, either socially, physically, etc. I don't think the changes end, I think you simply quit looking at them as landmarks, or benchmarks of your life. You just get used to it.

 

[Kadarin]

The sad thing about life is that just when we finally start getting really good at living it, it's almost time for it to end.

 

[Koing]

No. Just different that I'm not in Uni anymore, different feeling having to arrange to go out instead of just going out.

Koing

 

[akshatp]

You left HS 7 yrs ago and you are still in college; are you in med school?. You havent picked a major yet? (I am assuming getting into a university programme is like picking a major?)

Graduating might be one change you want to accelerate.

 

[Flyback]

Originally posted by: akshatp
You left HS 7 yrs ago and you are still in college; are you in med school?. You havent picked a major yet? (I am assuming getting into a university programme is like picking a major?)

Graduating might be one change you want to accelerate.

I didn't go directly to college afterwards. Tried a few other areas of study, worked a lot, etc. I'm thinking graduating will be even weirder. I've grown accustomed to the school I go to and doubt I'll visit it just for kicks in years to come.

Ah well. As one thing ends, another begins eh? The seasons of life.

 

[Deleted member 4644]

I am in my mid 20s and feel largely the same way. Society doesn't quite treat us like adults, yet we clearly are not children anymore. I too feel lots of changes and some fear of the future. You are right that having a plan is important. I think that once we are 30 we will look back and realize this was a time of transition.

 

[thepd7]

21 Here.

Both my parents died (Dad at 15, Mom at 19).
GF of 4.5 years and I broke up (possibly temporary but who knows).
No idea what the hell I want to do with a BS in EE.
So many things I want to do before I get married/settle down.
Brother is in the Army, going to Iraq within a year.
Sister is 17 (we are still close, just weird seeing her as that old).

So yes, I am with ya.

 

[pontifex]

no, my life is horribly and utterly boring and the same as always

 

[JEDI]

Originally posted by: Flyback
Ever feel weird (scared, even) by the way life pulls you along?

- Girl I thought I would marry ran off and married another guy. I'm over it but still feels odd.
- Parents are aging, it scares me.
- Don't talk with sister much. No bad blood, just different people. Saw her ~4 times in 2 years. We have very little in common.
- Haven't seen anyone that I went to high school with except one person at the gym. Left high school 7 years ago.
- Many of my relatives died or have been disowned.
- Have "friends" at college but none which I see myself hanging out with after its over.
- College is going to be over soon, and I don't know where the time went.
- Despite having dreams, I really have no clue where I want to be anymore or where I'm going.

I'm not depressed at all. My life couldn't be better in many ways:

- My business ideas are taking off and within 8 months time I'll hire my father out of retirement to manage the business (he will have something to do, we can spend more time together, I trust him more than anyone, and he is the smartest person I know).
- Likely going to get accepted into the university programme I want (will study part time so I can still focus on my business)
- Heading towards amateur bodybuilder status (non-competition/for self only).

Despite these lofty plans, I still feel weirded out by life. Its the whole "unknown" about it all at once given my 20s and being nearing the end of undergrad...

Did your life change this much in your 20s? You get weird by it all and do a Neo "whoa" ?

welcome to reality.

you've been away fromt eh internet too long.

given your traits listed, keep this up and russian roulette will be your best friend.

 

[Eska]

I feel ya man. This is my last year in college. My parents just sold their business and plan to move to another state. I'm probably going to stay here by myself.
I don't even see or talk with people that I used to be in contact with since HS. Feels odd indeed. I guess life goes on.

 

[thehstrybean]

:music: :music:
Come gather 'round people
Wherever you roam
And admit that the waters
Around you have grown
And accept it that soon
You'll be drenched to the bone.
If your time to you
Is worth savin'
Then you better start swimmin'
Or you'll sink like a stone
For the times they are a-changin'.

Come writers and critics
Who prophesize with your pen
And keep your eyes wide
The chance won't come again
And don't speak too soon
For the wheel's still in spin
And there's no tellin' who
That it's namin'.
For the loser now
Will be later to win
For the times they are a-changin'.

Come senators, congressmen
Please heed the call
Don't stand in the doorway
Don't block up the hall
For he that gets hurt
Will be he who has stalled
There's a battle outside
And it is ragin'.
It'll soon shake your windows
And rattle your walls
For the times they are a-changin'.

Come mothers and fathers
Throughout the land
And don't criticize
What you can't understand
Your sons and your daughters
Are beyond your command
Your old road is
Rapidly agin'.
Please get out of the new one
If you can't lend your hand
For the times they are a-changin'.

The line it is drawn
The curse it is cast
The slow one now
Will later be fast
As the present now
Will later be past
The order is
Rapidly fadin'.
And the first one now
Will later be last
For the times they are a-changin'.
:music: :music:

 

[imported_Imp]

:music:
Finals blew, I barely knew
My graduation speech
And with college out of reach
If I cant find a job its down to dad
And myrtle beach

So, Im bailing this town-or
Tearing it down-or
Probably more like
Hanging around,
Hanging around

Everyone I know is acting weird
Or way too cool
They hang out by the pool
So I just read a lot and ride my bike
Around the school

cause Im bailing this town-or
Tearing it down-or
Probably more like
Hanging around,
Hanging around

And all that I need now
Is someone with the brains
And the know-how
To tell me what I want...
Anyhow

12th of june, a gibbous moon
Was this the longest day?
Ill walk down to the bay
And jump off of the dock and watch
The summer waste away

Then, Im bailing this town-or
Tearing it down-or
Probably more like
Hanging around
Hanging around
Just hanging around

So tell me what I want