Girls are confusing...

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: jEct2
i've liked a girl for 2 and 1/2 years, she used to like me, but it didn't work out. We've had mixed emotions about each other ever since. Although I always told her I loved her, she said she never believed me because of bad experiences with other men. One of which was one of my most hated enemies. (Who went out with her just to spite me) Became suicidal, I got out of it about a year ago, and we've been trying to become friends again, but everytime we talked it seemed like all our past memories (bad memories) were being regurgitated and thus we argued everytime we spoke. Recently we've finally become good friends and then all of a sudden an 18 yr old fat lazy pervert starts feeling her and all of a sudden shes all over him. Although she normally hates perverted fat annoying guys. Not to mention the guy was one of my friends. I only remember my life since the age of 11 and im 15 so i only know of 4 years of my life, which is strange. Of those 4 years 2 and 1/2 were spent edicated to that one girl and now all of it is just crushed once again. Though this time I've finally decided to give up. It does also have to do with my previous post, http://forums.anandtech.com/messageview...atid=38&threadid=1545117&enterthread=y btw shr was girl #2

So now I'm just utterly lost.
I know I'm young and crap but I could use some comfort right now. I'm desperate enough to post this on a forum anyway right?

no negative comments please

here is my take: a lot of guys go through a phase where they say they are gonna kill themselves over a girl. for a lot of them it is all talk, but i know a guy who did it.
not worth it man... absolutely not worth it. suicide is selfish. think of your family, think of what they'd go through if you did it. think of someone besides yourself.

first, you gotta have respect for yourself, and love yourself before anyone is going to love you. this girl is not the only fish in the fishbowl. you get that? move on. concentrate on getting your act together and setting goals and accomplishing them, and then you'll find girls will want to come to you.

 

[OREOSpeedwagon]

Originally posted by: aplefka

Originally posted by: OREOSpeedwagon

Originally posted by: aplefka

Originally posted by: OREOSpeedwagon
You're lost? If the girl likes the guy, so be it. Let it go, realize that there is lots of other sh!t in the world to do than worry about a girl. If it's meant to work out then it will, just don't stress over it. Live your life and stop worrying about hers so much.

Wow, why does that sound so familiar?

Oh wait, cuz it was posted pretty much exactly the same in the other guy's thread.

yeah, i had them both open and posted in the wrong one

Hahaha nice. Happy 6000.

Thanks Makes me wonder what the hell I made 6000 posts about though.

 

[Iron Woode]

Originally posted by: jEct2
i've liked a girl for 2 and 1/2 years, she used to like me, but it didn't work out. We've had mixed emotions about each other ever since. Although I always told her I loved her, she said she never believed me because of bad experiences with other men. One of which was one of my most hated enemies. (Who went out with her just to spite me) Became suicidal, I got out of it about a year ago, and we've been trying to become friends again, but everytime we talked it seemed like all our past memories (bad memories) were being regurgitated and thus we argued everytime we spoke. Recently we've finally become good friends and then all of a sudden an 18 yr old fat lazy pervert starts feeling her and all of a sudden shes all over him. Although she normally hates perverted fat annoying guys. Not to mention the guy was one of my friends. I only remember my life since the age of 11 and im 15 so i only know of 4 years of my life, which is strange. Of those 4 years 2 and 1/2 were spent edicated to that one girl and now all of it is just crushed once again. Though this time I've finally decided to give up. It does also have to do with my previous post, http://forums.anandtech.com/messageview...atid=38&threadid=1545117&enterthread=y btw shr was girl #2

So now I'm just utterly lost.
I know I'm young and crap but I could use some comfort right now. I'm desperate enough to post this on a forum anyway right?

no negative comments please

Negative comments are about all you will get on this board.

If it makes any difference, I have been there and done that, except I was older. So I know and understand what its like.

I was 23 and she was 18 when we met. When we broke up I was 27 and she was 22. It was a nasty break up and we haven't spoken to each other in 13 years. I want to talk to her, but I don't want to cause any trouble either. Her parents still like me after all these years so maybe I could get her mother to help me talk to my ex GF.

She is one of the loose ends in my life that I would like to deal with.

 

[DanTMWTMP]

well, welcome to the world? @ 15, you're an immature little kid no matter how you look @ it. Being young = immature NO MATTER WHAT. @ 15, you're too young to post here. You'll get no sympathy from me.

Live with it. All of us went through that BS stage of our lives. All of us look back at those times of our lives and think "oh man what was I thinking, that was pretty stupid.."

I admit, when I was your age, I was pretty damn stupid and immature.

No worries, by the time you're in your 20's, everything will be fine.

 

[EyeMWing]

ATOT, STFU and stop being jealous. You guys are such insensitive bastards.

I've been in the exact same boat as you. TWICE. *YEARS* of my life, apparently wasted and irrecoverable. TWICE. Every day from July 25, 1999 to February 14, 2005.

Trust me, you will live to love again, IF, and only IF you let yourself. The first time... The infamous tag-teamed-on-a-boat incident. I thought it was all over. Thought about ending it right there. I eventually got over it, with the help of my second love. Then, last month, that collapsed at the hands of another male. While I'd like nothing better than to see his entrails strewn across a wall, that's counterproductive. Tommorrow, I will come home with a prom date lined up. Period. You have to force yourself to stay on the field. It's not comfortable. It's not fun. But you can't give up.

 

[CptObvious]

Being a teenager sucks because every girl you date or who shows a little interest towards you, you think she is going to be the love of your life. Don't kill yourself over it (literally), because you, your ex-girl, and your ex-friend are just running on hormones. It's probably not going to hit you until your 20's how much you are overreacting at this point. I'm only 24 but I'd say men and women don't even reach some sort of mutual understanding until their 30's.

 

[aplefka]

Originally posted by: VirtualLarry

Originally posted by: aplefka
You're 15?
You told someone you loved them at 13 years old? Give me a fvcking break, you have no clue what love is.

Isn't that a tad bit harsh though? I fell in love with this girl when I was, IIRC, 11, and she was of a similar age, and I still thought about her, all the way through HS.

Love is love, and IMHO, it can happen at any reasonable age. Granted, there might not have been sex included at that age, it was a younger love, not an "adult love", but the emotion is the same at the core. I agree with you though on one point, at that age, you have no idea of various responsibilities that may result from a "serious love" relationship, but I do feel that the desires of the heart themselves are more or less timeless.

To the OP: Heartbreak is a harsh thing, but like many parts of life, you'll get through it. Offing yourself at that age, is pretty lame, honestly. Although I was once in a similar boat. I alternative couldn't decide if I wanted to off myself, or blow up the entire rest of the world. Eventually, though, I managed to find my way out of that.

You just need to find something to do, that you enjoy, something that you're good at, and spend time doing that. Gotta repair yourself, and nobody can do that for you.

Oh, and ignore the a**h*** comments from some of the others in this thread, suggesting that you go through with it. They're actually joking, I sure, but they're just saying that to make fun of your sorrows.

Originally posted by: aplefka
You sound just like my little sister, who, by the way, I think has some serious issues.

Judging by your comments about your peers and your own age, I think you have some issues too. Wait until you're 22-25, and then you'll wonder where the heck your teenage years went to, and probably be sad that you didn't enjoy them more. At least, IMHO, speaking from someone that was likewise more interested in conversing with adults than those of my own age group around that time in my life.

I am quite enjoying my teenage years by hanging out with people who aren't dumbfvcks for the most part. Besides, it's one thing to be with all the guys and do something stupid. It's quite another to be alone and in a normal state of mind and say this kind of stuff.

At 15 years old there's no way you can know what love is. I'm sorry, you just can't. Have you had to deal with bills or supporting you and your SO? No. True love, at least to me, means compromise and sacrifice. What is there to compromise when you're 15? "I'm sorry honey, I just can't afford that Big Mac, you're gonna have to get something off the dollar menu." Give me a break.

I may enjoy talking with older people more, but so what? I don't only hang out with them. I still am in the company of my peers 75% of the time. There's only so much I can handle at once though, and it's sh1t like this that makes me dislike people my age. They need to grow the fvck up. Some of my friends are still acting the same way they did in middle school, which is just sad.

Growing up too fast isn't good, but being a little ahead in maturity level isn't a bad thing.

Edit: By the way, why would I wish to enjoy never being myself and following the latest trends? That's all 75% of teenagers do anyway. That's definitely not what I consider living my own life.

 

[shimsham]

Originally posted by: aplefka

Originally posted by: VirtualLarry

Originally posted by: aplefka
You're 15?
You told someone you loved them at 13 years old? Give me a fvcking break, you have no clue what love is.

Isn't that a tad bit harsh though? I fell in love with this girl when I was, IIRC, 11, and she was of a similar age, and I still thought about her, all the way through HS.

Love is love, and IMHO, it can happen at any reasonable age. Granted, there might not have been sex included at that age, it was a younger love, not an "adult love", but the emotion is the same at the core. I agree with you though on one point, at that age, you have no idea of various responsibilities that may result from a "serious love" relationship, but I do feel that the desires of the heart themselves are more or less timeless.

To the OP: Heartbreak is a harsh thing, but like many parts of life, you'll get through it. Offing yourself at that age, is pretty lame, honestly. Although I was once in a similar boat. I alternative couldn't decide if I wanted to off myself, or blow up the entire rest of the world. Eventually, though, I managed to find my way out of that.

You just need to find something to do, that you enjoy, something that you're good at, and spend time doing that. Gotta repair yourself, and nobody can do that for you.

Oh, and ignore the a**h*** comments from some of the others in this thread, suggesting that you go through with it. They're actually joking, I sure, but they're just saying that to make fun of your sorrows.

Originally posted by: aplefka
You sound just like my little sister, who, by the way, I think has some serious issues.

Judging by your comments about your peers and your own age, I think you have some issues too. Wait until you're 22-25, and then you'll wonder where the heck your teenage years went to, and probably be sad that you didn't enjoy them more. At least, IMHO, speaking from someone that was likewise more interested in conversing with adults than those of my own age group around that time in my life.

I am quite enjoying my teenage years by hanging out with people who aren't dumbfvcks for the most part. Besides, it's one thing to be with all the guys and do something stupid. It's quite another to be alone and in a normal state of mind and say this kind of stuff.

At 15 years old there's no way you can know what love is. I'm sorry, you just can't. Have you had to deal with bills or supporting you and your SO? No. True love, at least to me, means compromise and sacrifice. What is there to compromise when you're 15? "I'm sorry honey, I just can't afford that Big Mac, you're gonna have to get something off the dollar menu." Give me a break.

I may enjoy talking with older people more, but so what? I don't only hang out with them. I still am in the company of my peers 75% of the time. There's only so much I can handle at once though, and it's sh1t like this that makes me dislike people my age. They need to grow the fvck up. Some of my friends are still acting the same way they did in middle school, which is just sad.

Growing up too fast isn't good, but being a little ahead in maturity level isn't a bad thing.

Edit: By the way, why would I wish to enjoy never being myself and following the latest trends? That's all 75% of teenagers do anyway. That's definitely not what I consider living my own life.

the first thing about being "mature and growing up" is realising how little you know. youre 16 and coming down a 15 yo like youre 85 and have seen it all. youre just as immature and ignorant as you claim your age group to be. you also need to

grow the fvck up

btw, nice post virtuallarry.:beer:

 

[MisterChief]

:laugh: This is f(u)cking hillarious...

 

[dfi]

Just realize that you're a lot dumber at this age then you even realize. I'm not saying that to be mean to you; it's a general comment, and it was true for me too. You can really have some great times; all you have to do is give yourself permisison.

dfi

 

[VirtualLarry]

Originally posted by: aplefka
Growing up too fast isn't good, but being a little ahead in maturity level isn't a bad thing.

Edit: By the way, why would I wish to enjoy never being myself and following the latest trends? That's all 75% of teenagers do anyway. That's definitely not what I consider living my own life.

Well, true that. I wasn't trying to suggest becoming a "mindless teen", and giving in to peer pressure. No, do your own thing, and do what's right. I was just suggesting that effectively disowning your entire age-group and/or discriminating against them purely because of their age, might cause you to lose out on some things. I guess I'm just sort of speaking from a certain amount of painful experience myself, I was kind of "more mature" at an earlier age too, but it also caused me to lose out on a lot of social/emotional development with my peers at that age. I'm just hoping that it doesn't happen to you as well. You might be surprised, a lot of young women, act "stupid", only in order to attempt to get guys, when in fact they can (occasionally) actually have intelligent conversations. (This can depend on the time of the month as well.) If you can convince them that you accept them for their real person, instead of their "peer pressure-caused ditzy girl front", then you might get them to drop that act and in the process find someone decent. Then maybe you wouldn't "hate" on your age-group as much. Just a thought and a suggestion from someone who passed through, and passed-by, those years. OTOH, that's no reason to avoid any hot college girls either...

 

[JulesMaximus]

Originally posted by: aplefka
You're 15?

You told someone you loved them at 13 years old? Give me a fvcking break, you have no clue what love is.

I'm with this guy.

You're too young to know what love is. Get over yourself.

 

[DougK62]

Everything will be OK.

 

[deejayshakur]

are you korean? is the girl korean?

i hope you feel better.

 

[aplefka]

Originally posted by: VirtualLarry

Originally posted by: aplefka
Growing up too fast isn't good, but being a little ahead in maturity level isn't a bad thing.

Edit: By the way, why would I wish to enjoy never being myself and following the latest trends? That's all 75% of teenagers do anyway. That's definitely not what I consider living my own life.

Well, true that. I wasn't trying to suggest becoming a "mindless teen", and giving in to peer pressure. No, do your own thing, and do what's right. I was just suggesting that effectively disowning your entire age-group and/or discriminating against them purely because of their age, might cause you to lose out on some things. I guess I'm just sort of speaking from a certain amount of painful experience myself, I was kind of "more mature" at an earlier age too, but it also caused me to lose out on a lot of social/emotional development with my peers at that age. I'm just hoping that it doesn't happen to you as well. You might be surprised, a lot of young women, act "stupid", only in order to attempt to get guys, when in fact they can (occasionally) actually have intelligent conversations. (This can depend on the time of the month as well.) If you can convince them that you accept them for their real person, instead of their "peer pressure-caused ditzy girl front", then you might get them to drop that act and in the process find someone decent. Then maybe you wouldn't "hate" on your age-group as much. Just a thought and a suggestion from someone who passed through, and passed-by, those years. OTOH, that's no reason to avoid any hot college girls either...

Hahaha, the last line made me laugh.

Getting back to the serious subject at hand though, like I said, I hang out with all my friends and we do a lot of stuff together. Every day I could go do something if I wanted, but I don't choose too because I can only handle so much of the immaturity that comes with it. Usually my favorite settings are with 5-7 people or less. Anything over that and it brings out the little kid in us all, and that's fun, but only for so long.

Everything should be taken in moderation, and I make sure not to get too much otherwise it'd just make me dislike my own friends.

As for the bit about high school girls, I won't get into that. I'm in the friend zone with all the girls I'd be interested in because I was a nice guy with them all. Whatever, not a big deal. Not gonna kill myself over it like this guy seems to think is the only option.

 

[Thurgo0dy]

how stupid can you be to let a girl ruin your life at 15? What a candy ass

 

[StageLeft]

If you are missing 11 years of your life you could probably do with a trip to a physician.

In regards to the girl, as awful as it may sound later, you'll grow up and move on, and then you'll kick yourself for getting worked up over this. Honestly you will. You'll say "How could I have been so stupid?" I know it seems the world now, but I'm right.