I've installed security software that prevents any version of Wife from being installed, and it provides better support for OneNightStand than Girlfriend.
you guys are nuts ... but the great thing about Engagement Ring 1.0 is it sends Nookie 1.0 into hyper drive ... not to mention Mother-in-law 1.0 can also be relied on to take care of Finances 1.0 for Wedding 1.0 ... or atleast thats been my experience ...
The problem with Upgrading your software.. is you can never upgrade your hardware. Actually, your hardware is slowly downgraded... say, you start with a P100, and end up with a 386/16.
Eventually, your programs are so far upgraded, your hardware can't keep up and you suffer a big crash.
In the long run, you end up formatting and running DOS. No GUI 'cause your hardware can't run it anymore.
hehe
Eventually, your programs are so far upgraded, your hardware can't keep up and you suffer a big crash.
In the long run, you end up formatting and running DOS. No GUI 'cause your hardware can't run it anymore.
hehe
It is also said that Wedding 1.0 causes a BSOD in MarriedSexLife 1.0.
Soon, Mistress 1.0 is needed to remedy the situation.
Soon, Mistress 1.0 is needed to remedy the situation.
frenchie had it best, it worked sooo well.. . imagine trying to describe a job or other stuff like that. . hehh
<< frenchie had it best, it worked sooo well.. . imagine trying to describe a job or other stuff like that. . hehh >>
I agree, Frenchie started it off and did it best. This was a fun thread he started.
hmm maybe a follup thread concerning a girls viewpoint of such would be good and funny, het toolgirl, or girl friday, yeah girlfriday would be good, and/or isla!!, some one post here if they do make such a thread
Although I'd like to take credit for it, I can't. I got that joke ages ago, in a slightly diiferent form. It was resent to me recently, so I posted it. I've got lots more zingers, just have to get some time to dig 'em up and post em.
I'm still running BACHELOR 4.2, and I can't get the upgrade to MYGIRLFRIENDISAHOTBABE 1.0 to install correctly. Any advice is appreciated.
EDIT: I'm afraid infamous COMPUGEEK virus has spread too far. Is there a patch to upgrade this. Also if any Mods are available to "disguise" my virus, I would like to know. I heard GETDRUNK 1.1 is good, but I dunno.
EDIT: I'm afraid infamous COMPUGEEK virus has spread too far. Is there a patch to upgrade this. Also if any Mods are available to "disguise" my virus, I would like to know. I heard GETDRUNK 1.1 is good, but I dunno.
Just remember: any bugs from Mistress 1.2 can and will be carried over and infect Wife 1.0 and have various adverse effects. Usually leading and attempted uninstall of Wide 1.0 but will crash part way through and reduce system resources to a low enough level that any version of Mistress or Girlfriend will no longer load. Plus, any lengthy AntiVirus supplements to remove original bugs from Mitress 1.2 can be painful and don't always work thus further reducing system resources and shortening hardware life.
Guess I'll just stick with my open-sourced, HandLotion&Tissue 6.2...
I've been running it since little--highly compatible, low maintenance, and economical.
I've been running it since little--highly compatible, low maintenance, and economical.
Here is the original one from my joke archives. (Don't ask)
MS Humor
I'm currently running the latest version of Microsoft Girlfriend and I've been having some problems lately. I've been running the same version of MS DrinkingBuddies 1.0 Forever as my primary application, and all the GirlFriend releases I've tried have always conflicted with
it.
I hear that DrinkingBuddies won't crash if GirlFriend is run in background mode and the sound is turned off. But I'm embarrassed to say I can't find the utility to turn the sound off. I just run them separately, and it works okay. GirlFriend also seems to have a problem coexisting with my MS Football, Basketball, Hockey, Golf and Soccer programs, often trying to abort them with some sort of timing incompatibility errors.
I probably should have stayed with GirlFriend 1.0, but I thought I might see better performance from GirlFriend 2.0. After months of conflicts and other problems, I consulted a friend who has had experience with GirlFriend 2.0. He said I probably didn't have enough cache to run GirlFriend 2.0 and eventually it would require a Token Ring to run properly. He was right - as soon as I purged my cache, it uninstalled itself.
Shortly after that, I installed GirlFriend 3.0 beta. All the bugs were supposed to be gone, but the first time I used it, it gave me a virus anyway. I have to clean out my whole system and shut down for a while.
I very cautiously upgraded to GirlFriend 4.0. This time I used a SCSI probe first and also installed a virus protection program. It worked okay for a while until I discovered that GirlFriend 4.0 has a feature I didn't know about that automatically senses the presence of any other version of GirlFriend and communicates with it in some way, which results in the immediate removal of both versions.
The version I have now works pretty well, but there are still some problems. Like all versions of GirlFriend, it is written in some obscure language I can't understand, much less reprogram. Frankly I think there is too much attention paid to the look and feel rather than the desired functionality. Also, to get the best connections with your hardware, you usually have to use gold-plated contacts. And I've never liked how GirlFriend is totally "object-oriented".
A year ago, a friend of mine upgraded his version of GirlFriend to GirlFriendPlus 1.0, which is a Terminate and Stay Resident version of GirlFriend. He discovered that GirlFriendPlus 1.0 expires within a year if you don't upgrade to Fiancee 1.0. So he did, but soon after that, he had to upgrade to Wife 1.0, which he describes as a huge resource hog. It has taken up all his space, so he can't load anything else until he upgrades his systems hardware.
One of the primary reasons he decided to go with Wife 1.0 was because it came bundled with FreeSexPlus. Well, as it turns out the resource allocation module of Wife 1.0, when bundled with MS Fulltime-Job, sometimes prohibits access to FreeSexPlus, particularly the new
Plug-Ins and Device-Drivers he wanted to try.
On top of that, Wife 1.0 must be running on a well warmed-up system before he can do anything. Although he did not ask for it, Wife 1.0 came with MS MotherIn-Law which has an automatic pop-up display, and sound feature he can't turn off.
I told him to try installing MS Mistress 1.0, but he said he heard if you try to run it without first uninstalling Wife 1.0, Wife 1.0 will automatically PKunzip MS Lawyer, scan all subdirectories, and delete MS Money files before doing the uninstall itself. Then Mistress 1.0 won't install anyway because of insufficient resources.
MS Humor
I'm currently running the latest version of Microsoft Girlfriend and I've been having some problems lately. I've been running the same version of MS DrinkingBuddies 1.0 Forever as my primary application, and all the GirlFriend releases I've tried have always conflicted with
it.
I hear that DrinkingBuddies won't crash if GirlFriend is run in background mode and the sound is turned off. But I'm embarrassed to say I can't find the utility to turn the sound off. I just run them separately, and it works okay. GirlFriend also seems to have a problem coexisting with my MS Football, Basketball, Hockey, Golf and Soccer programs, often trying to abort them with some sort of timing incompatibility errors.
I probably should have stayed with GirlFriend 1.0, but I thought I might see better performance from GirlFriend 2.0. After months of conflicts and other problems, I consulted a friend who has had experience with GirlFriend 2.0. He said I probably didn't have enough cache to run GirlFriend 2.0 and eventually it would require a Token Ring to run properly. He was right - as soon as I purged my cache, it uninstalled itself.
Shortly after that, I installed GirlFriend 3.0 beta. All the bugs were supposed to be gone, but the first time I used it, it gave me a virus anyway. I have to clean out my whole system and shut down for a while.
I very cautiously upgraded to GirlFriend 4.0. This time I used a SCSI probe first and also installed a virus protection program. It worked okay for a while until I discovered that GirlFriend 4.0 has a feature I didn't know about that automatically senses the presence of any other version of GirlFriend and communicates with it in some way, which results in the immediate removal of both versions.
The version I have now works pretty well, but there are still some problems. Like all versions of GirlFriend, it is written in some obscure language I can't understand, much less reprogram. Frankly I think there is too much attention paid to the look and feel rather than the desired functionality. Also, to get the best connections with your hardware, you usually have to use gold-plated contacts. And I've never liked how GirlFriend is totally "object-oriented".
A year ago, a friend of mine upgraded his version of GirlFriend to GirlFriendPlus 1.0, which is a Terminate and Stay Resident version of GirlFriend. He discovered that GirlFriendPlus 1.0 expires within a year if you don't upgrade to Fiancee 1.0. So he did, but soon after that, he had to upgrade to Wife 1.0, which he describes as a huge resource hog. It has taken up all his space, so he can't load anything else until he upgrades his systems hardware.
One of the primary reasons he decided to go with Wife 1.0 was because it came bundled with FreeSexPlus. Well, as it turns out the resource allocation module of Wife 1.0, when bundled with MS Fulltime-Job, sometimes prohibits access to FreeSexPlus, particularly the new
Plug-Ins and Device-Drivers he wanted to try.
On top of that, Wife 1.0 must be running on a well warmed-up system before he can do anything. Although he did not ask for it, Wife 1.0 came with MS MotherIn-Law which has an automatic pop-up display, and sound feature he can't turn off.
I told him to try installing MS Mistress 1.0, but he said he heard if you try to run it without first uninstalling Wife 1.0, Wife 1.0 will automatically PKunzip MS Lawyer, scan all subdirectories, and delete MS Money files before doing the uninstall itself. Then Mistress 1.0 won't install anyway because of insufficient resources.
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