girl wants to be together 24/7...

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zixxer

Diamond Member
Jul 6, 2001
7,326
0
0
not that I mind so much, but due to where we both live it makes more sense for me to stay at her place - I don't have a ton of traffic getting to work from her apt, while she has an extra 20-25min of traffic if staying at my place.

We've spent the night at her place about 70% of the time, and mine about 30% of the time.. but never being at my place is starting to get to me.. I tried to bring it up and she got somewhat upset.. I think she took it as me being 'sick of her' or something.. she didn't guilt trip me or anything, but I dunno... what's a good way to tell her either we stay at my place or stay at our respective place for a couple days?


EDIT:

I called her and was like hey.. I'm gonna stay at my place tonight I don't feel like driving and miss my stuff.. she was fine w/ it, asked if I was sick of her or anything (and that we've spent a lot of time together so she understands if I want time alone) and said no.. I'm just sick of driving so far to work and I miss my stuff.. so cool.. she took it well.
 
xSkyDrAx

xSkyDrAx

Diamond Member
Sep 14, 2003
7,706
1
0
ill take her off your hands for a couple days

cause you know, that'd what friends are for.. ;)
 
RichUK

RichUK

Lifer
Feb 14, 2005
10,341
678
126
OMG you lose. You've forgot to put your obligatory YAGT in the thread title. For shame!
 
I

InlineFive

Diamond Member
Sep 20, 2003
9,599
2
0
:thumbsdown: for needy girls. On the other hand if you are really serious about each other get one place.
 
S

Sqube

Diamond Member
Dec 23, 2004
3,078
1
0
Try joking about it. Say something like you don't remember what your apartment looks like, and would she like to stay there every so often to keep the memory of it fresh in your mind?

Or you could try this "honesty" thing that I've heard has been making the rounds in some circles. It's just crazy talk as far as I can tell, though.
 
Spineshank

Spineshank

Diamond Member
Jun 8, 2001
7,728
1
71
I would just be upfront bout it. If shes upset over that than you are saving yourself down the line.
 
B

blazerazor

Golden Member
Aug 28, 2003
1,480
0
0
Never move in with her, or let her move in with you. You will have NO ESCAPE / HIDING PLACE and all chances of strange Poon will be almost ZERO. Unless its one of her friends seeking revenge for some guy stealing BS from HS days. And you DONT want to go there, I promise.
 
meltdown75

meltdown75

Lifer
Nov 17, 2004
37,548
7
81
Just tell her you want to chill at home alone for a night. If that makes her go bananas then you know what you have to do. It will only get worse with time - deal with it now as opposed to later!
 
Y

yowolabi

Diamond Member
Jun 29, 2001
4,183
2
81
There is no good way. Experience has trained me to always start my relationships off slowly, consciously making sure we don't talk every night/we don't spend every night together/i don't answer my cell every time she calls. You can always deepen a relationship, but once you've set some patterns, it's incredibly hard to back it down without some hurt feelings.

So here's what you should do. Unless you want to give up and just be unhappy, you're going to have to talk to her again. This time you need to go in with a better plan and better explanation.

Tell her that you feel like you've abandoned your friends and they're important to you. Tell her that you've seen when two people didn't have their own lives, and have even went through it, and that it always puts too much pressure on the other person. Tell her that you having her own space and her having her own, will make things that much more special when you do spend time together. That instead of it being a routine you'll be that much more excited about the time you do spend together.

And In between all the other stuff, tell her over and over that you wanting "space" isn't a euphemism for wanting to see any other girls or being bored with her. Find some websites like this where other guys or experts talk about how wanting a little alone time is normal, healthy, and doesn't mean you love the other person a less.

And then prepare for her cr, because only 1 in a million girls won't see this as rejection and a prelude to you breaking up with them. Remember this lesson for next time and never let it get so deep that you feel you have to back off.
 
Z

zixxer

Diamond Member
Jul 6, 2001
7,326
0
0
Originally posted by: yowolabi
There is no good way. Experience has trained me to always start my relationships off slowly, consciously making sure we don't talk every night/we don't spend every night together/i don't answer my cell every time she calls. You can always deepen a relationship, but once you've set some patterns, it's incredibly hard to back it down without some hurt feelings.

So here's what you should do. Unless you want to give up and just be unhappy, you're going to have to talk to her again. This time you need to go in with a better plan and better explanation.

Tell her that you feel like you've abandoned your friends and they're important to you. Tell her that you've seen when two people didn't have their own lives, and have even went through it, and that it always puts too much pressure on the other person. Tell her that you having her own space and her having her own, will make things that much more special when you do spend time together. That instead of it being a routine you'll be that much more excited about the time you do spend together.

And In between all the other stuff, tell her over and over that you wanting "space" isn't a euphemism for wanting to see any other girls or being bored with her. Find some websites like this where other guys or experts talk about how wanting a little alone time is normal, healthy, and doesn't mean you love the other person a less.

And then prepare for her cr, because only 1 in a million girls won't see this as rejection and a prelude to you breaking up with them. Remember this lesson for next time and never let it get so deep that you feel you have to back off.
Click to expand...

damn dude you rock. thanks!
 
A

aidanjm

Lifer
Aug 9, 2004
12,411
2
0
give her a little present, or do something sweet like take out the garbage. that way she knows you aren't sick of her. :p
 
Rumpltzer

Rumpltzer

Diamond Member
Jun 7, 2003
4,815
33
91
I have similar problems with my gf.

My wife doesn't like her hanging out around the house all the time, and the gf doesn't like it when the wife is calls and needs to talk for a few minutes...


My solution is usually to go hang out at second gf's house. She's a lot more chill about stuff.
 
n7

n7

Elite Member
Jan 4, 2004
21,281
4
81
Originally posted by: Rumpltzer
I have similar problems with my gf.

My wife doesn't like her hanging out around the house all the time, and the gf doesn't like it when the wife is calls and needs to talk for a few minutes...


My solution is usually to go hang out at second gf's house. She's a lot more chill about stuff.
Click to expand...

:Q
 
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