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Gay (and straight) ATOTers, Your thoughts on...

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Does it make me a bad person to feel bothered when I see a gay couple with an adopted child?

I was watching some real estate show on Bravo called "flipped out" or something like that and the main guy is openly gay and then one of his business partners is also openly gay and has an adopted baby girl with his lover.

I just couldn't help but feel that that will be one messed up child possibly when she grows up, but then again realized that at least she was given a home and adopted at all as it is.

I couldn't give two shits if someone is gay or not and it does not bother me to be around gays or know someone is gay but for whatever reason I just feel that a child raised by a gay couple will become a screwed up person more so than if they were raised by a traditional mother and father in equal environments, situations, etc...

I do realize that there are always exceptions to everything out there and that it's not a given that this will be the case, but still feel it nonetheless.
 
My wife watches the gay channels known as Bravo and WE all the time and even she :roll: at the flamboyance of some. It's just over-the-top and borderline unbearable in some cases and strikes a nerve.
 
Originally posted by: Platypus
And just for the record, the stereotype is almost perfectly true... I live in one of the gayest areas in the US and a decent chunk of the population consists of shallow, overly flamboyant, bitchy drama queens who conjure drama and pathetic strife at any opportunity presented. They are hollow self-serving plastic people.

That's most likely why trash like <insert reality show / unrealistic sitcom> markets to this population... because they eat it up.

I'd like to think most gay guys aren't like that out there but I've seen enough to question that belief. I think that I'm the minority instead.
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:heart: Platypus.

my 2cents = i don't like drama queens/kings who happen to be straight or otherwise. i was just on vacation not too long ago in Florida and a friend of mine brought a friend with her, yes, he was gay. all he did the whole time was make fun of himself and of gay people. wtf? it got old very fast. i realize that's probably a defense mechanism for him, but constant gay jokes from anyone just aren't that funny. he ended up sounding pathetic. which is how a lot of these TV show with flamers on them sound. It is one gay joke after another.... after another.... after another. funny not found.
 
Originally posted by: lokiju
Does it make me a bad person to feel bothered when I see a gay couple with an adopted child?

I was watching some real estate show on Bravo called "flipped out" or something like that and the main guy is openly gay and then one of his business partners is also openly gay and has an adopted baby girl with his lover.

I just couldn't help but feel that that will be one messed up child possibly when she grows up, but then again realized that at least she was given a home and adopted at all as it is.

I couldn't give two shits if someone is gay or not and it does not bother me to be around gays or know someone is gay but for whatever reason I just feel that a child raised by a gay couple will become a screwed up person more so than if they were raised by a traditional mother and father in equal environments, situations, etc...

I do realize that there are always exceptions to everything out there and that it's not a given that this will be the case, but still feel it nonetheless.
Click to expand...

Of course you have absolutely zero facts to back that feeling up.
 
Lloyd is just like this Asian male nurse I once set in the hospital. Had the same mannerisms and everything. But damn nurse I ever had.
 
Originally posted by: JulesMaximus
Originally posted by: lokiju
Does it make me a bad person to feel bothered when I see a gay couple with an adopted child?

I was watching some real estate show on Bravo called "flipped out" or something like that and the main guy is openly gay and then one of his business partners is also openly gay and has an adopted baby girl with his lover.

I just couldn't help but feel that that will be one messed up child possibly when she grows up, but then again realized that at least she was given a home and adopted at all as it is.

I couldn't give two shits if someone is gay or not and it does not bother me to be around gays or know someone is gay but for whatever reason I just feel that a child raised by a gay couple will become a screwed up person more so than if they were raised by a traditional mother and father in equal environments, situations, etc...

I do realize that there are always exceptions to everything out there and that it's not a given that this will be the case, but still feel it nonetheless.
Click to expand...

Of course you have absolutely zero facts to back that feeling up.
Click to expand...

I agree with JulesMaximus, there have been studies done comparing children raised in normal households compared to same-sex households and they found no difference in how the children turn out.
 
Originally posted by: JulesMaximus
Originally posted by: lokiju
Does it make me a bad person to feel bothered when I see a gay couple with an adopted child?

I was watching some real estate show on Bravo called "flipped out" or something like that and the main guy is openly gay and then one of his business partners is also openly gay and has an adopted baby girl with his lover.

I just couldn't help but feel that that will be one messed up child possibly when she grows up, but then again realized that at least she was given a home and adopted at all as it is.

I couldn't give two shits if someone is gay or not and it does not bother me to be around gays or know someone is gay but for whatever reason I just feel that a child raised by a gay couple will become a screwed up person more so than if they were raised by a traditional mother and father in equal environments, situations, etc...

I do realize that there are always exceptions to everything out there and that it's not a given that this will be the case, but still feel it nonetheless.
Click to expand...

Of course you have absolutely zero facts to back that feeling up.
Click to expand...

WTF does facts have to do with feelings? 😕
 
I don't watch TV, but I do watch DVDs. I just got the first season of "SOAP," a sitcom from the 1970s. It was free a the library. Billy Crystal was an emerging actor then and played a gay guy. It was funny.

Like the time his mother catches him wearing her clothes in her bedroom. She was upset and said, "You look better in that dress than I do." Billy Crystal is pretty funny anyway.
 
Originally posted by: Xanis
My one gay friend puts it this way:

"I'm a gay man who hates gay men"

Basically he tells me that he hates the stereotypical flamboyant gay man that is portrayed in movies, on TV, etcetera because it gives the rest of them a bad name. He also says that people shouldn't be stereotyping just because of those flamboyant guys on TV because he says that most gay men (at least the ones he knows) aren't like that.
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That falls much in line with what I feel. A portion of the gay population is the epitome of the word gentleman. The other portion no so much.
 
I don't really mind the flamboyant gay guy, but the black chick who claims to have the ability to fuck the gay outta you is just ridiculous.
 
Originally posted by: lokiju
Originally posted by: JulesMaximus
Originally posted by: lokiju
Does it make me a bad person to feel bothered when I see a gay couple with an adopted child?

I was watching some real estate show on Bravo called "flipped out" or something like that and the main guy is openly gay and then one of his business partners is also openly gay and has an adopted baby girl with his lover.

I just couldn't help but feel that that will be one messed up child possibly when she grows up, but then again realized that at least she was given a home and adopted at all as it is.

I couldn't give two shits if someone is gay or not and it does not bother me to be around gays or know someone is gay but for whatever reason I just feel that a child raised by a gay couple will become a screwed up person more so than if they were raised by a traditional mother and father in equal environments, situations, etc...

I do realize that there are always exceptions to everything out there and that it's not a given that this will be the case, but still feel it nonetheless.
Click to expand...

Of course you have absolutely zero facts to back that feeling up.
Click to expand...

WTF does facts have to do with feelings? 😕
Click to expand...

He put that out there not me. I was merely pointing out the fact that his feelings have absolutely zero basis in reality.
 
Originally posted by: Killerme33
Originally posted by: JulesMaximus
Originally posted by: lokiju
Does it make me a bad person to feel bothered when I see a gay couple with an adopted child?

I was watching some real estate show on Bravo called "flipped out" or something like that and the main guy is openly gay and then one of his business partners is also openly gay and has an adopted baby girl with his lover.

I just couldn't help but feel that that will be one messed up child possibly when she grows up, but then again realized that at least she was given a home and adopted at all as it is.

I couldn't give two shits if someone is gay or not and it does not bother me to be around gays or know someone is gay but for whatever reason I just feel that a child raised by a gay couple will become a screwed up person more so than if they were raised by a traditional mother and father in equal environments, situations, etc...

I do realize that there are always exceptions to everything out there and that it's not a given that this will be the case, but still feel it nonetheless.
Click to expand...

Of course you have absolutely zero facts to back that feeling up.
Click to expand...

I agree with JulesMaximus, there have been studies done comparing children raised in normal households compared to same-sex households and they found no difference in how the children turn out.
Click to expand...

Link to the studies? I would be interested in reading them.

Would it be fair to say that an important part of a child's development is learning the gender roles from their mother and father? If we can establish that, then what impact would two men, acting in a very feminine manner, have on a young boy? Or the opposite situation with two women and a little girl?
 
Originally posted by: JulesMaximus
Originally posted by: lokiju
Does it make me a bad person to feel bothered when I see a gay couple with an adopted child?

I was watching some real estate show on Bravo called "flipped out" or something like that and the main guy is openly gay and then one of his business partners is also openly gay and has an adopted baby girl with his lover.

I just couldn't help but feel that that will be one messed up child possibly when she grows up, but then again realized that at least she was given a home and adopted at all as it is.

I couldn't give two shits if someone is gay or not and it does not bother me to be around gays or know someone is gay but for whatever reason I just feel that a child raised by a gay couple will become a screwed up person more so than if they were raised by a traditional mother and father in equal environments, situations, etc...

I do realize that there are always exceptions to everything out there and that it's not a given that this will be the case, but still feel it nonetheless.
Click to expand...

Of course you have absolutely zero facts to back that feeling up.
Click to expand...

Why does he need facts when he has conjecture? A child is always much better off to be with a heterosexual couple that despise each other an are only staying together "for the children".

Originally posted by: Abe Froman
So what happened to these studies?
Click to expand...

Click me!

So how are they doing, now that they've reached young adulthood?

Some critics have suggested these children -- along with Samuel David Cheney, Mary Cheney's infant son -- are doomed to a life of struggle compared with those raised in a more traditional, Ozzie-and-Harriet-model family, with a mother and a father.

But most studies have found that outcomes for children of gay and lesbian parents are no better -- and no worse -- than for other children, whether the measures involve peer group relationships, self-esteem, behavioral difficulties, academic achievement, or warmth and quality of family relationships.

No one knows precisely how many children in the United States have at least one parent who is lesbian or gay. Estimates range all the way from 1 million to 9 million.

For many of these young people, though, growing up in what census researchers call a "same-sex parent household" doesn't have to be a big deal -- except that, these days, it is.
"With all due respect to Cheney and her partner," Dr. James Dobson of the conservative Christian group Focus on the Family, wrote in Time magazine in December, "the majority of more than 30 years of social-science evidence indicates that children do best on every measure of well-being when raised by their married mother and father."

Some liberals chimed in too, notably Pulitzer Prize-winning columnist Leonard Pitts, who cited "a growing body of research that tells us the child raised without his or her biological father is significantly more likely to live in poverty, do poorly in school, drop out altogether, become a teen parent, exhibit behavioral problems, smoke, drink, use drugs or wind up in jail."

The problem with the research cited by both Dr. Dobson and Mr. Pitts is that it compares children of heterosexual couples only with those of single parents and not with children of same-sex parent families, said Gary Gates, a senior research fellow at the Williams Institute at UCLA School of Law and an expert on census data involving gay and lesbian households.

"There are virtually no studies that make a direct comparison with same-sex parents," he said, noting census data show one in four same-sex couples are raising a child under the age of 18.

A number of professional medical organizations -- including the American Medical Association, the American Academy of Pediatrics and the American Psychiatric Association -- have issued statements claiming that a parent's sexual orientation is irrelevant to his or her ability to raise a child.

For the most part, the organizations are relying on a relatively small but conclusive body of research -- approximately 67 studies -- looking at children of gay parents and compiled by the American Psychological Association. In study after study, children in same-sex parent families turned out the same, for better or for worse, as children in heterosexual families.

Moreover, a 2001 meta-analysis of those studies found that the sexual orientation of a parent is irrelevant to the development of a child's mental health and social development and to the quality of a parent-child relationship.
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Or me!

Or me!
 
I don't much care. Hollywood uses all kinds of stereotypes.

"HAH! That guy has glasses, and he's playing a scientist! Hahaha, that's so like a scientist to do something like that!"

Take your pick.



It isn't much concern to how I think of people. I've known gays already, and really, they're pretty well just people. Yeah, their gender preference isn't the norm.
So what.

Doomsday morons act like it's some terrible plague or something that's going to eradicate humanity.
But it involves sex so people get all worked up over it. Walk into a room and talk about gay sex, and it's like firing a gun in a room full of monkeys, everyone starts freaking out like it's the end of the world. Except the monkeys will have the sense to calm down eventually.

 
Those discussing gays raising children: find your own thread.

I know (or, more accurately, have been introduced to) a tremendous number of gays that meet the stereotypes head-on. Same situation with the hyper-masculine body builders that do everything they can to be the opposite of the gay stereotype. While I watched Will & Grace, Jack was absolutely my least favorite character... the image he gave of the community was (IMO) horrendous. Will, on the other hand, I liked quite a bit.

JUST BE YOURSELF, DAMNIT. It pisses me off to no end when I see gays "become" one of the many stereotypes after they come out of the closet. If that's truly them, it would more than likely have been previous exhibited in some fashion, and good for them. The rest of you, stop reinforcing the incorrect and damaging stereotypes that are cast upon us. In my mind, the "average gay man" is roughly equivalent to the "average man" - the average lawyer, musician, politician, custodian, electrical engineer, etc. Why do we need to be distinguished from Joe Straight simply because of our sexual orientation? Nothing else is different about us.

Subjectively, I'd have to say that my answer to your poll is "It's horrendous and hinders the forward motion of open-mindedness in America and worldwide!". Objectively, I can't answer, since many people apparently like the stereotypes and are bringing acceptance toward the community as a whole.
 
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