Funny University police reports

[thirtythree]

I don't know if all universities do this, but mine has a list of police reports for each month online. It's on the "Department of Public Safety" website for my school. I like these two:

2006-19392 Fraud
A resident of the University Village sold a couch through an online classified website. The buyer of the couch sent the seller a check for $3000.00 for a $675.00 purchase, asking that the seller deposit the check and wire back the difference. The seller did as asked and then discovered that the check was drawn on a closed.

2006-21645 Theft
A laptop computer was left in a lounge area of one of the student apartments for five minutes. When the owner returned, all that was left was the power cord mouse. The owner found her computer in a cupboard of the lounge area a short time later.

 

[j00fek]

pooned

 

[thirtythree]

2006-19291 Theft
A man reported that someone had stolen his food from a refrigerator in the architecture building.

2006-9825 Recovered Stolen Car - sort of
Four members of a sorority located their house director's stolen car in a lot near the Marriott Library. The women called Salt Lake City Police, the agency to which the theft had been originally reported. Salt Lake City Police called University Police to take the recovery since the car was on University property. University Police called the owner who came to the scene to get her car. It was then that she remembered that she had parked it there and forgotten that she had done so. It was in this state of forgetfulness that she reported the car stolen from the sorority house.

Haha.

 

[zebano]

Yeah my college had that in the twice weekly paper they disributed.

 

[giantpinkbunnyhead]

Originally posted by: thirtythree
I don't know if all universities do this, but mine has a list of police reports for each month online. It's on the "Department of Public Safety" website for my school. I like these two:

2006-19392 Fraud
A resident of the University Village sold a couch through an online classified website. The buyer of the couch sent the seller a check for $3000.00 for a $675.00 purchase, asking that the seller deposit the check and wire back the difference. The seller did as asked and then discovered that the check was drawn on a closed.

2006-21645 Theft
A laptop computer was left in a lounge area of one of the student apartments for five minutes. When the owner returned, all that was left was the power cord mouse. The owner found her computer in a cupboard of the lounge area a short time later.

That sounds like the exact same format the police reports were in, when I went to USC 10 years ago. They were often rather..... silly.

 

[thirtythree]

2005-28452 Telephone Harassment
A woman reported that she received a strange phone message on her College of Science line. The caller said, "I am Stephen Hawking. Turn over all your computer equipment or you will be destroyed. I am your leader." 12-5-05

LOL

 

[screw3d]

All the campus police reports I get in my email are people getting mugged by some dude on gun/knife point. Sometimes some dude gets arrested. Oh what fun in South Central L.A.

 

[ScottyB]

Originally posted by: thirtythree
2005-28452 Telephone Harassment
A woman reported that she received a strange phone message on her College of Science line. The caller said, "I am Stephen Hawking. Turn over all your computer equipment or you will be destroyed. I am your leader." 12-5-05

LOL

WTF? That woman is a total b!tch. That is something you laugh about and tell your friends, not call the police.

 

[thirtythree]

Originally posted by: screw3d
All the campus police reports I get in my email are people getting mugged by some dude on gun/knife point. Sometimes some dude gets arrested. Oh what fun in South Central L.A.

Yeah, there were some not-so-fun ones, but no point in depressing people.

 

[LordMorpheus]

Haha, in the Rice Police blotter you will see how much rice cops favor rice kids.

I mean, you'll see "Fight at football game. Non-rice student reprimanded to Harris County Jail, Rice student referred to student judicial programs"

Student judicial programs = a few hours of community service. You see stuff like this all the time. I think it's hilarious.

 

[Born2bwire]

I like to read the police blotter as well since you occasionally find one that you know has an interesting story behind it. One of the more recent talked about how the offender was driving a car and hit a motocycle that was stopped at the intersection for the light. After hitting the bike, the offender backed up and hit a police car that was behind him, also stopped for the light. I then noticed that the offender was arrested at an intersection that was a few blocks away. I guess if you end up hitting a cop car you might as well make the most of it.

 

[George P Burdell]

From git.police.crime-reports:

2006052547 10/2/2006 16:28:00 hrs. LOCATION: 500 block Tech Parkway
INCIDENT: Entering Auto: Offender arrested for auto theft, entering
auto, and possession of tools for commission of a crime, transported by
ambulance to Grady Hospital and transported to the Fulton County Jail.
DISPOSITION: Clear By Arrest.

2006052032 9/30/2006 6:41:00 hrs. LOCATION: 879 Hemphill
Avenue/Beringause/Patrol Parking Lot
INCIDENT: Arson: Report of a burned vehicle. DISPOSITION: Active.

2006052307 10/1/2006 12:47:00 hrs. LOCATION: 118 Bobby Dodd
Way/Glenn Residence Hall
INCIDENT: Student Conduct Code Violation: Report smell of marijuana.
DISPOSITION: Unfounded.

2006051292 9/27/2006 12:57:00 hrs. LOCATION: 350 Ferst
Drive/Student Center
INCIDENT: Larceny-Theft (Miscellaneous Property): Report of stolen
Chick-Fil-A sandwich. DISPOSITION: Active.

 

[Vonkhan]

Over the last summer I spent on campus, I would put my food in the common fridge and some bastard kept eating it. So one day I pissed a little on a slice of pizza. The idiot ate it and the next date I posted a sticky saying what I had done. He complained to Campus Security. They laughed, but they wagged their finger at me.

 

[George P Burdell]

Originally posted by: Vonkhan
Over the last summer I spent on campus, I would put my food in the common fridge and some bastard kept eating it. So one day I pissed a little on a slice of pizza. The idiot ate it and the next date I posted a sticky saying what I had done. He complained to Campus Security. They laughed, but they wagged their finger at me.

mad props to you

 

[Otaking]

Originally posted by: Vonkhan
Over the last summer I spent on campus, I would put my food in the common fridge and some bastard kept eating it. So one day I pissed a little on a slice of pizza. The idiot ate it and the next date I posted a sticky saying what I had done. He complained to Campus Security. They laughed, but they wagged their finger at me.

:Q