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Funny/Crazy stories about your wild/stupid/smart dogs.

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one of our old saint bernards was a very nice dog, except when it came to our old neighbor. he would bark his head off everytime he saw the neighbor around. one day, the saint bernard was tied to the legs at the base of the AC unit (which was set in concrete), and the neighbor came outside and the dog starts barking / tugging and WHAM! he pulled the AC unit out of the foundation it was set in :Q he chased the neighbor with an AC unit pulling behind him...

a couple of months later, we were gone and the neighbor tried to break into our house and was caught and taken away =P smart dog.

one of our current saint bernards kept biting at his tail despite everything we did... one day, he bit too much, wound got infected, and tail had to be removed. it's a sad / funny sight to see him wagging his tail stump =P
 
My dog (wolf/malemute hybrid...she's gone now...sniff....but she made it all the way to 17 years) used to like to stash food in my laundry pile. I'd be sorting on laundry and you just never knew what you'ld find. I once found an entire Pappa Murphy's chicago style pizza layered completely through the pile. She'd partially chewed it up and spread all around. On the floor beneath the pile was a plate with my birthday cake but all that was left was the german chocolate frosting. Also in the pile was a unopened package of hotdogs, a half loaf of bread, a jar of pickles, mustard jar, sack of yams, some onions, and a miller lite (she loved beer, she'd make a small puncture in an unopened can and then lie there and lick it). How does a dog pick up a jar of pickles!?? I guess she rolled it there. Silly damn dog! Anyhow, I learned to make sure my fridge was shut before leaving for work after that.....
 
My golden retriever eats dirt and sh!t, and has been doing it for 15 years now.

I have absolutely no idea why, he has food available all day and we give him treats pretty often. I guess he's just that dumb.
 
My sister tied our dogs (a beagle and a lab) to the back of her friend's pick up truck to head to the dog park. While the car is in motion, the beagle decides to jump out of the truck and is dangling from the side the truck. Choking and barking like a dead seal ... my sister's friend stopped the truck andmy sister had to put the beagle inside the truck with them. Haha.

Max the Beagle
 
Our dog Jack, decided one evening that he wanted more of the roast, so what does he do, but goes to the fridge, open it up, pull out the roast and proceed to eat it. That was the first time that he opened the fridge. It was one that he could open by pawing at the side of the door and open it up. After that, we made sure that something was up next to the fridge so that he couldn't open it up. But now we don't have to worry about it, as we got a new fridge and he can't open it up.

 
Originally posted by: Grant
Our dog Jack, decided one evening that he wanted more of the roast, so what does he do, but goes to the fridge, open it up, pull out the roast and proceed to eat it. That was the first time that he opened the fridge. It was one that he could open by pawing at the side of the door and open it up. After that, we made sure that something was up next to the fridge so that he couldn't open it up. But now we don't have to worry about it, as we got a new fridge and he can't open it up.

Hellz no. You don't touch another man's food 😀
 
I remember when my black lab was young (3 or 4 years old). It was around Halloween and we were decorating the yard with stuff. Well this particular year we had this spider and pumpkin "trash bag" decoration that you stuff with leaves or newspaper to fill them out. Well since my mom had just gotten a boatload of things in the mail (entire cooking set of pots, pans, etc) and we had lots of packing peanuts, I came up with the brilliant idea to fill these decorations with packing peanuts instead of leaves! I figured that would kill two birds with one stone. Well it worked out great, Halloween went by on a Thursday that year, and we decided we would take down the decorations over the weekend. Saturday rolls along...We wake up in the morning and look outside...

Me: (still a bit groggy) "Did it snow last night?"
Mom: "No they didn't call for any snow."
Me: "Then what is in our yard?"

*Takes a closer look outside and "Oh Crap" feeling sets in*

Me: "Are those packing peanuts?!!!"

The most amazing thing was not the fact that packing peanuts were everywhere, but the fact the dog somehow managed to evenly cover a .2 acre yard with them. We spent weeks cleaning the bulk of them. We were still finding packing peanuts while gardening for 13 more years until we moved. To this day when I get things in the mail and packing peanuts spill out, I think about that and laugh.
 
Perhaps the greatest story I can tell about my late dog was that he died along with the jackrabbit he was chasing. They both got hit by the same transport.

rose.gif
4 Toby the German Shepherd - who NEVER ran across the highway - unless of course... he had a damn good reason to.
 
Originally posted by: Lord Zado
The most amazing thing was not the fact that packing peanuts were everywhere, but the fact the dog somehow managed to evenly cover a .2 acre yard with them. We spent weeks cleaning the bulk of them. We were still finding packing peanuts while gardening for 13 more years until we moved. To this day when I get things in the mail and packing peanuts spill out, I think about that and laugh.

ROTF, great story :laugh::thumbsup:
 
Originally posted by: JulesMaximus
Originally posted by: NFS4
Originally posted by: shilala
Dude, those aren't dogs, they're poodles.
They may as well be curly haired cats.

Whatever. Poodles are smarter than just about any other dogs out there

http://www.stanleycoren.com/e_intelligence.htm

Yet, you can't seem to teach yours not to pee in the house...:laugh:

It has nothing to do with her not being trained...she is. She's 4 years old and house broken.

She was getting back at my mom for not paying her any attention. My mom was on the floor playing with Jazmine for about 10 minutes after they got back home. My mom didn't pay any attention to Buttons whatsoever and didn't play with her. That's a big no no to show affection for one and not the other.

Buttons just decided to piss on the floor b/c she knew that was one way of getting attention, even if it meant punishment.
 
My old dog Heidi (white German Shepard lived to 17) was a very smart dog. We used to chain her up using one of the clamps that just push it (like a carabineer) anyways the dog figured out how to do it herself. For awhile I kept getting punished for not chaining her up until my mom finally caught her in the act sitting on her hind legs and working the clamp with her paws.

But no matter how smart she was she had a fetish for fish fertilizer. There were numerous times when we would go into the front yard to see huge bottles of the stuff in the yard. Friggen burned huge patches in the grass. My neighbors started learning to lock that stuff up. They would have gotten mad but everyone loved her. She actually stopped someone breaking into my neighbors house and our own.
 
Originally posted by: NFS4
I was talking to my mom this afternoon and the first thing I asked her (as is ALWAYS the first thing I ask her when I call) is "How is my dog?"

She told me that my dog, Buttons, was on punishment b/c she peed on the kitchen floor. OK, fair enough, she does it from time to time but whatever. Buttons is house broken, but sometimes she gets pissed when you leave her for a long time and she'll get back at you (my parents were gone all day)...but she hadn't done it in about 6 monmths or so. So my mom stuck her nose in it and gave her "time out" in their walk-in shower in the bathroom for a few hours (she gave her food and water, some doggie treats, a toy and put her sleeping matt in there). My mom put a rubber door stopper under the door so that she couldn't get out b/c she'll just jump up and open the door otherwise.

So, my mom puts her in, closes the shower door, then lays down on her bed to watch TV. About 5 minutes later, our other dog, Jazmin, comes strolling into my parent's room and walks into the bathroom. My mom next hears scratching and banging coming from the shower. She gets up to see what's going on and finds Jazmin scratching and biting at the rubber stopper to pull it out while Buttons is pushing her nose up against the stopper from her side of the door.

WTF, Jazmin is trying to bust Buttons out of jail!!! 😛 My mom calls my dad into the room so that he can see what they're up to and he tells Jazmin to get back in the bedroom and let Buttons take her punishment. Jazmin comes back into the bedroom, jumps up onto my parents bed and then proceeds to howl at my dad as if to say "Let her out mofo!!"

My parents were so tickled that they just let Buttons out and Jazmin and Buttons went into the living room to play with their stuffed carrot 😛

Buttons on the left, Jazmin on the right:

http://pics.bbzzdd.com/users/NFS4/Buttons_Jazmine.jpg

Your dog's name is buttons? Hand in your man card, immediately!
 
my dog loves rat meat.

when we cut down a tree in the back yard a rat came running out of it when it hit the ground.
the dog went nuts chasing & chewing on it until i got it & threw it in the garbage.

when we had our house remodeled the contractor found an old, desiccated rat corpse in the wall & threw
it out in a pile of trash to be hauled away. the dog retrieved it & ate it.

other than that she's a pretty normal German Shepherd.
 
When my German Shepard was a puppy he loved this bean bag that my little brother had. He would pounce on it and chase anyone away from it that he didn't know. Well, my brother decides to take it outside so he can play with it during the day while everyone is gone. Not a good idea!

We came home the next day and all the little tiny foam beads from inside the bean bag were ALL OVER the back lawn. That's not even the funniest part though. My dad flipped and made my lil bro clean them all up. I was sitting in my bedroom a hour or so later and I heard someone singing outside. I opened the window and heard my brother singing this:

Massa got me workin!,
Pickin up de cotton,
Some day massa set me free!

My little brother was singing a negro spiritual! :laugh: :laugh:
 
Originally posted by: NFS4
Originally posted by: shilala
Dude, those aren't dogs, they're poodles.
They may as well be curly haired cats.

Whatever. Poodles are smarter than just about any other dogs out there

http://www.stanleycoren.com/e_intelligence.htm

I think that is referring to standard poodles, not mini's.. 😛

I have a chocolate lab, and he amazes me every day.. Lately he has been very intent on cleaning everying execept two pillows off the couch before he will lay on it. My wife and I have watched him carefully pull off books, blankets, and remotes.. Then he will carefully position two pillows and get damn comfy..

Cracks me up.
 
Nothing too funny, but our new lab, Sadie, just found out what mud is this weekend while we were working in the yard. After the day was finished, she was promptly given a bath.

**Not Dialup Friendly**

Mud Fun
Wet Dog
 
Originally posted by: jEnus
Nothing too funny, but our new lab, Sadie, just found out what mud is this weekend while we were working in the yard. After the day was finished, she was promptly given a bath.

**Not Dialup Friendly**

Mud Fun
Wet Dog

now that is a cute dog
 
Originally posted by: hevnsnt
Originally posted by: NFS4
Originally posted by: shilala
Dude, those aren't dogs, they're poodles.
They may as well be curly haired cats.

Whatever. Poodles are smarter than just about any other dogs out there

http://www.stanleycoren.com/e_intelligence.htm

I think that is referring to standard poodles, not mini's.. 😛

I have a chocolate lab, and he amazes me every day.. Lately he has been very intent on cleaning everying execept two pillows off the couch before he will lay on it. My wife and I have watched him carefully pull off books, blankets, and remotes.. Then he will carefully position two pillows and get damn comfy..

Cracks me up.

My dogs are Toys, not Minis.
 
my current dog - a chow/lab mix - is outstanding. . . . one weird thing: The Chow [part] wants to BITE strangers and the Lab [part] wants to run for help after biting.
😀
[really]

my smartest dog was an Airedale . . . a one-person dog and jealous as hell . . . . when i found a lost German Shepherd and kept it in my backyard while looking for the owner, my dog PRETENDED to like the "new" dog . . . then while i was at work the next day, dug a BIG hole, got the other dog lost and proudly returned all by himself!
:shocked:
 
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