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Exterous blog: hardest ever wine to open

E

Exterous

Super Moderator
Good grief. Took one of us holding the bottle down while the other was heaving to get the wine cork out. Years of wine drinking and never had an issue. Not sure if they used a powder actuated nailer to get that cork in or something...
 
Exterous said:
Good grief. Took one of us holding the bottle down while the other was heaving to get the wine cork out. Years of wine drinking and never had an issue. Not sure if they used a powder actuated nailer to get that cork in or something...
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I heard the Los Angeles police can open any bottle of wine really easily. In fact they can open cases of wine all at once very quickly. Just won't be any wine left to drink.
 
OK, so like, who and what appendage was holding the bottle down, and who and what (orifice?) was doing the...gripping and heaving?

I'm curious, because I'm not sure if you have been opening wine bottles properly all these years, and I just want to offer some advice. We need to clear this, first.
 
Why would you ever need to hold a bottle down? You should be leveraging the bottle against the cork to remove it.
 
zinfamous said:
OK, so like, who and what appendage was holding the bottle down, and who and what (orifice?) was doing the...gripping and heaving?

I'm curious, because I'm not sure if you have been opening wine bottles properly all these years, and I just want to offer some advice. We need to clear this, first.
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Yes.

deadlyapp said:
Why would you ever need to hold a bottle down? You should be leveraging the bottle against the cork to remove it.
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It's one of those cheap openers that's just corkscrew and handle. We used to travel with our own but I got tired of being pulled aside at every TSA checkpoint so we just use what we can get at hotels
 
Exterous said:
Yes.



It's one of those cheap openers that's just corkscrew and handle. We used to travel with our own but I got tired of being pulled aside at every TSA checkpoint so we just use what we can get at hotels
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no wine key?

how do you not at least find a wine key? or just shove the thing in with whatever keys you have?
 
Exterous said:
Yes.



It's one of those cheap openers that's just corkscrew and handle. We used to travel with our own but I got tired of being pulled aside at every TSA checkpoint so we just use what we can get at hotels
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Might want to look into an ah-so. Should have no problem traveling with one.

Last I checked, a standard corkscrew was permitted in carry on as long as it doesn't have a foil/wax cutter.
 
Wuss. This is how real men open wine bottles:

AdorableRevolvingAntipodesgreenparakeet-size_restricted.gif
 
zinfamous said:
no wine key?

how do you not at least find a wine key? or just shove the thing in with whatever keys you have?
Click to expand...
deadlyapp said:
Might want to look into an ah-so. Should have no problem traveling with one.

Last I checked, a standard corkscrew was permitted in carry on as long as it doesn't have a foil/wax cutter.
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I have those I just don't travel with them as it was, for me, a 100% guarantee of being pulled aside and having it and often the rest of my luggage inspected by the TSA. They still let me pass with it but the extra hassle wasn't worth it.

And we've done many a hotel room shenanigans to get wine bottles open as a shocking number of hotels don't have wine openers - even in Italy!
 
Hardest bottle of wine for me to open was when we went to the beach and I wanted to get laid by her really bad, she loved wine, but I forgot to pack a wine opener. So I threw the bottle up in the air and a seagull with a nice sharp beak helped a brother out, too bad his head came off with the cork. (Names have been changed to protect the innocent in the BS beach tale).
 
ultimatebob said:
Try a Rabbit corkscrew puller. I had one of the lever style ones, and it's an amazing piece of hardware!
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We actually have one of those at home. It was a decent quality Amazon warehouse deal like 7 years ago for ~$10. It typically gets used weekly
 
This got me thinking, there should be an emergency hotline for situations like this. Imagine if you could not get it open at all. 😱
 
I still thing the most surefire way to open a bottle of wine with no other implements is the shoe trick. Works on most all corks.
 
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