engagement rings are so blah

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Doboji

Diamond Member
May 18, 2001
7,912
0
76
Whats the point of having money if you don't spend it on things that make life wonderful. I am very happy with every dime I spent on my fiancee's diamond ring... it's beautiful, and it really establishes something in the relationship. It's one thing to talk about getting married, it's another thing to take the time energy and money to actually get engaged, and then married. If you're not serious... you're not gonna follow through. If you are serious... then when it's all said and done it's worth every penny.

-Max
 

Amplifier

Banned
Dec 25, 2004
3,143
0
0
Originally posted by: Doboji
Whats the point of having money if you don't spend it on things that make life wonderful. I am very happy with every dime I spent on my fiancee's diamond ring... it's beautiful, and it really establishes something in the relationship. It's one thing to talk about getting married, it's another thing to take the time energy and money to actually get engaged, and then married. If you're not serious... you're not gonna follow through. If you are serious... then when it's all said and done it's worth every penny.

-Max


A lump of carbon mined by wage slaves in nigeria establishes something in a relationship?

Brainwashed.
 

TheLonelyPhoenix

Diamond Member
Feb 15, 2004
5,594
1
0
Originally posted by: Trygve
Originally posted by: TheLonelyPhoenix
Women cost money.

Sure, but there's got to be a point to having money, too. There's only so much fun you can have upgrading your computer.

I didn't say that they weren't worth it. Well, some are worth it, anyway.

Just pointing out that nothing in life is free.
 

mugs

Lifer
Apr 29, 2003
48,920
46
91
A "really expensive church?" :confused: Most of the money for a wedding is spent on the reception, photographer, flowers, so on and so forth. ~$100 a plate adds up.

As for engagement rings with huge diamonds... they look tacky. I'm amazed by people who go cheap on the other features of the diamond to get a bigger size. I bought my fiancee a relatively small diamond with very good cut, clarity and color, and it's amazingly beautiful. She'd rather have that than a big, dull diamond that looks huge on her hand.
 

z0mb13

Lifer
May 19, 2002
18,106
1
76
It is truly sad how now ALL women expect to get diamonds for engagement..

I heard in the past a gold ring was enough

 

trmiv

Lifer
Oct 10, 1999
14,670
18
81
I gave my wife a ring that had originally been given to my great grandmother by my great grandfather. So there was some family history there, and some actual importance. She really liked that, and likes to tell her friends about it. It's not the biggest ring on earth, but at least it means something. Cost? $0.

Also, we had our wedding in my parents backyard. We did the music, and really searched around for good deals on food, and photographer. We found this great, hole-in-the-wall catering place that was 50% cheaper than anywhere else, and had awesome food. Also we got a great deal on the photographer. We didn't spend a lot on the wedding, but it was nice and everyone had a great time.
 

KarenMarie

Elite Member
Sep 20, 2003
14,372
6
81
Originally posted by: ghostman
snipped to aviod dreaded nested quotes

I see your point, but I still hate the ring. Sure, it'll be there 30 years later, but what good has it done in all those years? For the cost of that ring, you could invest it and probably pay off (at least part of) your kid's college education when time comes. Or buy a car. Or pay for part of your house. Or travel. Having it sit on a finger sounds like a huge waste of money.

Not to mention, it would make you a prime target for a mugging (I live in the city, so I think about these things...). Nonetheless, I'll probably end up buying one when time comes :-/

For the cost of the ring I could....

VeggieFrog's education is not an issue. She is almost done and it has not been a problem so far. The house was paid for in cash the day we bought it. All of our vehicles were paid for in cash the day we bought them. I have been to 3/4 of the states in this country and traveled extensively around Europe dfuring the 8yrs I lived in the UK.

As far as the mugging deal. Hmmm.. I dont really go to the places that I would worry about it. If I were to travel, it would be in a safe place and not on display. And I am not sure if I would wear it in an every day situation.

On a personal level... when I was young... like all little girls... I had my dream of what the perfect wedding/marriage/husband would be like. And just like others, life's reality soon kicked my azz on it all. I never had the dream dress, or wedding or romantic ceremony or honeymoon or any of it. Now that I am divorced, I am glad that I did not spend the money on those things... but there is still a tiny 'little girl' part of me that regrets the dreams that never were realized. I have come to the point that the white rolls and exotic honeymoon and spending thousands to feed other ppl are not a huge deal to me. I want to be married in church. I want to have the ring that I dreamed of when I was a little girl. Silly maybe... but ... well... it is just the one thing that I want.

:)
 

dderidex

Platinum Member
Mar 13, 2001
2,732
0
0
Originally posted by: BobDaMenkey
Women, they make the highs higher and the lows lower. I'm glad to be rocking the single life, especailly after I had been seriously entertaining thoughts of living the rest of my life with my now ex.

This is...unusually insightful for ATOT.

That's *exactly* what women do. Make the highs higher and the lows lower.

Now, if only a relationship had more of the ONE than the OTHER, things would be golden!
 

Doboji

Diamond Member
May 18, 2001
7,912
0
76
Originally posted by: Amplifier
Originally posted by: Doboji
Whats the point of having money if you don't spend it on things that make life wonderful. I am very happy with every dime I spent on my fiancee's diamond ring... it's beautiful, and it really establishes something in the relationship. It's one thing to talk about getting married, it's another thing to take the time energy and money to actually get engaged, and then married. If you're not serious... you're not gonna follow through. If you are serious... then when it's all said and done it's worth every penny.

-Max


A lump of carbon mined by wage slaves in nigeria establishes something in a relationship?

Brainwashed.


Yeah believe it or not it does.... it's not the diamond itself... it's the effort put out to acquire the diamond in the first place... I spent 3 months learning about the diamonds, and saving up money to buy it. Marriage is work.... buying a diamond is work. Diamonds are kinda neat anyway... it's almost like collecting baseball cards... all the stats and values... it's fun actually.

-Max
 

Amplifier

Banned
Dec 25, 2004
3,143
0
0
Originally posted by: Doboji
Originally posted by: Amplifier
Originally posted by: Doboji
Whats the point of having money if you don't spend it on things that make life wonderful. I am very happy with every dime I spent on my fiancee's diamond ring... it's beautiful, and it really establishes something in the relationship. It's one thing to talk about getting married, it's another thing to take the time energy and money to actually get engaged, and then married. If you're not serious... you're not gonna follow through. If you are serious... then when it's all said and done it's worth every penny.

-Max


A lump of carbon mined by wage slaves in nigeria establishes something in a relationship?

Brainwashed.


Yeah believe it or not it does.... it's not the diamond itself... it's the effort put out to acquire the diamond in the first place... I spent 3 months learning about the diamonds, and saving up money to buy it. Marriage is work.... buying a diamond is work. Diamonds are kinda neat anyway... it's almost like collecting baseball cards... all the stats and values... it's fun actually.

-Max

Stop rationalizing and be honest. You got the ring because it's tradition/expected. If I find the girl of my dreams I'll probably cave in too.

But I won't call it anything but a stupid rock I was forced to buy :).
 

BigToque

Lifer
Oct 10, 1999
11,700
0
76
Originally posted by: Amplifier
Originally posted by: Doboji
Originally posted by: Amplifier
Originally posted by: Doboji
Whats the point of having money if you don't spend it on things that make life wonderful. I am very happy with every dime I spent on my fiancee's diamond ring... it's beautiful, and it really establishes something in the relationship. It's one thing to talk about getting married, it's another thing to take the time energy and money to actually get engaged, and then married. If you're not serious... you're not gonna follow through. If you are serious... then when it's all said and done it's worth every penny.

-Max


A lump of carbon mined by wage slaves in nigeria establishes something in a relationship?

Brainwashed.


Yeah believe it or not it does.... it's not the diamond itself... it's the effort put out to acquire the diamond in the first place... I spent 3 months learning about the diamonds, and saving up money to buy it. Marriage is work.... buying a diamond is work. Diamonds are kinda neat anyway... it's almost like collecting baseball cards... all the stats and values... it's fun actually.

-Max

Stop rationalizing and be honest. You got the ring because it's tradition/expected. If I find the girl of my dreams I'll probably cave in too.

But I won't call it anything but a stupid rock I was forced to buy :).

Who cares if it's a tradition? In a society, most people like to follow tradition. Why does it make someone "brainwashed" because they want to do what everyone before them got to do?

I love the fact that when the time comes, I too will buy a beautiful stone to place on my GF's hand. Sure it's expensive (it's expensive for almost everyone), but it's worth every penny when my GF gets to show it off.
 

Taggart

Diamond Member
Apr 23, 2001
4,384
0
0
Originally posted by: Stefan


I love the fact that when the time comes, I too will buy a beautiful stone to place on my GF's hand. Sure it's expensive (it's expensive for almost everyone), but it's worth every penny when my GF gets to show it off.

That's what it comes down to; vanity and conceit. Why should anyone have the need to show off anything? Aren't you proud and confident in yourself without showing off?

This is kinda changing the subject, but I think it is worth a mention. Instead of buying a ring for thousands of dollars, why not buy a more affordable ring. This way you can donate the rest to a charity of your choice and save some guy from dying in the street. What is more important, showing off a diamond to your girlfriends or saving a life? I'm quite serious.
 

Amplifier

Banned
Dec 25, 2004
3,143
0
0
Originally posted by: Stefan
Originally posted by: Amplifier
Originally posted by: Doboji
Originally posted by: Amplifier
Originally posted by: Doboji
Whats the point of having money if you don't spend it on things that make life wonderful. I am very happy with every dime I spent on my fiancee's diamond ring... it's beautiful, and it really establishes something in the relationship. It's one thing to talk about getting married, it's another thing to take the time energy and money to actually get engaged, and then married. If you're not serious... you're not gonna follow through. If you are serious... then when it's all said and done it's worth every penny.

-Max


A lump of carbon mined by wage slaves in nigeria establishes something in a relationship?

Brainwashed.


Yeah believe it or not it does.... it's not the diamond itself... it's the effort put out to acquire the diamond in the first place... I spent 3 months learning about the diamonds, and saving up money to buy it. Marriage is work.... buying a diamond is work. Diamonds are kinda neat anyway... it's almost like collecting baseball cards... all the stats and values... it's fun actually.

-Max

Stop rationalizing and be honest. You got the ring because it's tradition/expected. If I find the girl of my dreams I'll probably cave in too.

But I won't call it anything but a stupid rock I was forced to buy :).

Who cares if it's a tradition? In a society, most people like to follow tradition. Why does it make someone "brainwashed" because they want to do what everyone before them got to do?

I love the fact that when the time comes, I too will buy a beautiful stone to place on my GF's hand. Sure it's expensive (it's expensive for almost everyone), but it's worth every penny when my GF gets to show it off.

I'm not going to call it a tradition because a CORPORATION made it up 80 years ago. Depending on her age, your grandmother didn't have a ring besides a wedding band.

The only reason guys are putting buying a diamond above seeing a chick flick (in things you do to make a girl happy) is because they spend so much money on it.

 

Sphexi

Diamond Member
Feb 22, 2005
7,280
0
0
Originally posted by: Amplifier
Originally posted by: Stefan
Originally posted by: Amplifier
Originally posted by: Doboji
Originally posted by: Amplifier
Originally posted by: Doboji
Whats the point of having money if you don't spend it on things that make life wonderful. I am very happy with every dime I spent on my fiancee's diamond ring... it's beautiful, and it really establishes something in the relationship. It's one thing to talk about getting married, it's another thing to take the time energy and money to actually get engaged, and then married. If you're not serious... you're not gonna follow through. If you are serious... then when it's all said and done it's worth every penny.

-Max


A lump of carbon mined by wage slaves in nigeria establishes something in a relationship?

Brainwashed.


Yeah believe it or not it does.... it's not the diamond itself... it's the effort put out to acquire the diamond in the first place... I spent 3 months learning about the diamonds, and saving up money to buy it. Marriage is work.... buying a diamond is work. Diamonds are kinda neat anyway... it's almost like collecting baseball cards... all the stats and values... it's fun actually.

-Max

Stop rationalizing and be honest. You got the ring because it's tradition/expected. If I find the girl of my dreams I'll probably cave in too.

But I won't call it anything but a stupid rock I was forced to buy :).

Who cares if it's a tradition? In a society, most people like to follow tradition. Why does it make someone "brainwashed" because they want to do what everyone before them got to do?

I love the fact that when the time comes, I too will buy a beautiful stone to place on my GF's hand. Sure it's expensive (it's expensive for almost everyone), but it's worth every penny when my GF gets to show it off.

I'm not going to call it a tradition because a CORPORATION made it up 80 years ago. Depending on her age, your grandmother didn't have a ring besides a wedding band.

The only reason guys are putting buying a diamond above seeing a chick flick (in things you do to make a girl happy) is because they spend so much money on it.

Thousands of years ago prospective grooms were required/expected to provide some sort of gift to the bride's parents. Goats, cows, gold, something like that. Just because in America for the first hundred or so years of our existence we were too poor to do such a thing doesn't mean it didn't continue elsewhere. Diamond rings may very well have been the idea of some jewelry company back in the early 1900s, but the idea of giving your bride or her family a gift as a show of your commitment isn't a new idea. I personally don't have any cows to give to her dad, so instead I'll give her a fancy/expensive ring.

If you don't want to, then don't. Expect a lot of flak from parents and friends, but that's your choice.
 

MrDudeMan

Lifer
Jan 15, 2001
15,069
94
91
Originally posted by: Sphexi

Thousands of years ago prospective grooms were required/expected to provide some sort of gift to the bride's parents. Goats, cows, gold, something like that. Just because in America for the first hundred or so years of our existence we were too poor to do such a thing doesn't mean it didn't continue elsewhere. Diamond rings may very well have been the idea of some jewelry company back in the early 1900s, but the idea of giving your bride or her family a gift as a show of your commitment isn't a new idea. I personally don't have any cows to give to her dad, so instead I'll give her a fancy/expensive ring.

If you don't want to, then don't. Expect a lot of flak from parents and friends, but that's your choice.

at least the items given in other cultures were useful. ohh look a big shiny ring! now i am a more useful human being!
 

Sphexi

Diamond Member
Feb 22, 2005
7,280
0
0
Originally posted by: Bigsm00th
Originally posted by: Sphexi

Thousands of years ago prospective grooms were required/expected to provide some sort of gift to the bride's parents. Goats, cows, gold, something like that. Just because in America for the first hundred or so years of our existence we were too poor to do such a thing doesn't mean it didn't continue elsewhere. Diamond rings may very well have been the idea of some jewelry company back in the early 1900s, but the idea of giving your bride or her family a gift as a show of your commitment isn't a new idea. I personally don't have any cows to give to her dad, so instead I'll give her a fancy/expensive ring.

If you don't want to, then don't. Expect a lot of flak from parents and friends, but that's your choice.

at least the items given in other cultures were useful. ohh look a big shiny ring! now i am a more useful human being!

Like I said, if you don't like it, simply don't do it. No point in getting all upset over something you have no plans on taking part of. Go give your girlfriend a car or a stove or something instead. I'm sure she'll love you just as much.
 

Amplifier

Banned
Dec 25, 2004
3,143
0
0
Originally posted by: Sphexi
Originally posted by: Bigsm00th
Originally posted by: Sphexi

Thousands of years ago prospective grooms were required/expected to provide some sort of gift to the bride's parents. Goats, cows, gold, something like that. Just because in America for the first hundred or so years of our existence we were too poor to do such a thing doesn't mean it didn't continue elsewhere. Diamond rings may very well have been the idea of some jewelry company back in the early 1900s, but the idea of giving your bride or her family a gift as a show of your commitment isn't a new idea. I personally don't have any cows to give to her dad, so instead I'll give her a fancy/expensive ring.

If you don't want to, then don't. Expect a lot of flak from parents and friends, but that's your choice.

at least the items given in other cultures were useful. ohh look a big shiny ring! now i am a more useful human being!

Like I said, if you don't like it, simply don't do it. No point in getting all upset over something you have no plans on taking part of. Go give your girlfriend a car or a stove or something instead. I'm sure she'll love you just as much.

We aren't dumb, we know how superficial American females are. If they don't get their shiney rock they'll just die....

p.s. 60% divorce rate.
 

MrDudeMan

Lifer
Jan 15, 2001
15,069
94
91
Originally posted by: Amplifier
Originally posted by: Sphexi
Originally posted by: Bigsm00th
Originally posted by: Sphexi

Thousands of years ago prospective grooms were required/expected to provide some sort of gift to the bride's parents. Goats, cows, gold, something like that. Just because in America for the first hundred or so years of our existence we were too poor to do such a thing doesn't mean it didn't continue elsewhere. Diamond rings may very well have been the idea of some jewelry company back in the early 1900s, but the idea of giving your bride or her family a gift as a show of your commitment isn't a new idea. I personally don't have any cows to give to her dad, so instead I'll give her a fancy/expensive ring.

If you don't want to, then don't. Expect a lot of flak from parents and friends, but that's your choice.

at least the items given in other cultures were useful. ohh look a big shiny ring! now i am a more useful human being!

Like I said, if you don't like it, simply don't do it. No point in getting all upset over something you have no plans on taking part of. Go give your girlfriend a car or a stove or something instead. I'm sure she'll love you just as much.

We aren't dumb, we know how superficial American females are. If they don't get their shiney rock they'll just die....

p.s. 60% divorce rate.

Sphexi, I understand your point, but Amplifier is mostly right.
 

Anubis

No Lifer
Aug 31, 2001
78,712
427
126
tbqhwy.com
what i dont understand is why all of you have to pay for your own weddings, its the brides father who pays for that so basically its a freebee
 

MrDudeMan

Lifer
Jan 15, 2001
15,069
94
91
Originally posted by: Anubis
what i dont understand is why all of you have to pay for your own weddings, its the brides father who pays for that so basically its a freebee

wtf? ive never, ever heard of that. ive been part of 3-4 weddings and known many people my age who have been married, and not a single one of them had the brides father pay for the ring. it has always been the groom.

edit: sorry, i thought you said wedding rings. im an idiot.
 

Anubis

No Lifer
Aug 31, 2001
78,712
427
126
tbqhwy.com
Originally posted by: dderidex
Originally posted by: BobDaMenkey
Women, they make the highs higher and the lows lower. I'm glad to be rocking the single life, especailly after I had been seriously entertaining thoughts of living the rest of my life with my now ex.

This is...unusually insightful for ATOT.

That's *exactly* what women do. Make the highs higher and the lows lower.

Now, if only a relationship had more of the ONE than the OTHER, things would be golden!

hes not insightfull he stole that quote from Nietzsche
 

Sphexi

Diamond Member
Feb 22, 2005
7,280
0
0
We're getting married this summer, at a nice private ceremony for just the two of us (and perhaps a few local friends), the "real" wedding will be held in a year or two back west once we move back over there, but it'll still be pretty simple. Nothing fancy for me, we're going to do it at a local B&B that has this fantastic garden w/waterfall out back, rent it out for a few hours, get a room in the place, spend the weekend shacked up relaxing while someone else does all the work for once.