Kyteland
Diamond Member
Originally posted by: TheLonelyPhoenix
USNG AL CAPS IS RILLY ELIET11111 OMG WTF
What the Declaration of Independence would look like if it had been sent by email:
WHEN IN DA COURSE OF HUMAN 3VANTS IT BCOM3S NEC3SARY FOR ONE PEOPLE 2 DISOLVA DA POLITICAL BANDS WHICH HAEV CON3CT3D THEM WIT ANOTHER AND 2 ASUM3 MONG TEH POWERS OF DA EARTH DA S3PARAET AND 3QUAL STATION 2 WHICH TEH LAWS OF NATURA AND OF NATURES GOD ENTITL3 THEM A DAC3NT R3SPACT 2 TEH OPINIONS OF MANKIND RAQUIERS TAHT THEY SHUD R TEH CAUSES WHICH IMPEL THEM 2 DA S3PARATION!!!!1 OMG WTF
WE HOLD TH3SE TRUTHS 2 B SALF-EVIEDNT TAHT AL MAN R CREAETD EQUAL TAHT TH3Y R 3NDOWED BY THEYRE CRAA2R WIT C3RTANE UNALEINABLA RIGHTS TAHT MONG THES3 R LIEF LIEBRTY AND TEH PURSUIT OF HAPIENS11111!! LOL -TAHT 2 SACURE THESE RIGHTS GOV3RNMANTS R INSTITUT3D MONG M3N D3RIVNG THEYRE JUST POWERS FROM TEH CONSENT OF DA GOV3RNED -TAHT WHENEV3R ANY FORM OF GOVERNMENT BCOM3S D3STRUCTIEV OF TH3SE ANDS IT IS DA RIGHT OF DA PEOPLA 2 ALT3R OR 2 ABOLISH IT AND 2 INSTITUTA NU GOVERNMENT LAYNG ITS FOUNDATION ON SUCH PRINCIPLAS AND ORGANIZNG ITS POW3RS IN SUCH FORM AS 2 THEM SHAL SEM MOST LIEKLY 2 EFECT THEYRE SAEFTY AND HAPIENS1!!1!1!1 OMG WTF PRUD3NCE INDED WIL DICTAET TAHT GOV3RNM3NTS LONG ESTABLISHAD SHUD NOT B CHANGED FOR LIGHT AND TRANSEINT CAUS3S AND ACORDNGLY AL 3XP3REINCE HATH SHAWN TAHT MANKIND R MOR3 DISPOS3D 2 SUFER WHIEL EVILS R SUF3RABLE THAN 2 RIGHT THEMSELV3S BY ABOLISHNG DA FORMS 2 WHICH TH3Y R ACUS2M3D!1!111 WTF BUT WHEN A LONG TRANE OF ABUSES AND USURPATIONS PURSUNG INVARIABLY DA SM3 OBJACT AVINC3S A DESIGN 2 REDUCE THAM UNDAR ABSOLUTA DESPOTISM IT IS THERE RIGHT IT IS THERE DUTY 2 THROW OF SUCH GOVARNM3NT AND 2 PROVIED NU GUARDS FOR THERE FUTURE S3CURITY!!111!!1 ?SUCH HAS BEN TEH PATEINT SUFERANC3 OF THESE COLONEIS AND SUCH IS NOW TEH NACESITY WHICH CONSTRANES THEM 2 ALTER THERE FORM3R SYSTAMS OF GOVARNMANT!1!!111 OMG WTF TEH HIS2RY OF TEH PR3SENT KNG OF GR3AT BRITANE [GEORG3 II] IS A HIS2RY OF REP3AETD INJUREIS AND USURPATIONS AL HAVNG IN DIERCT OBJECT DA ESTABLISHMANT OF AN ABSOLUTE TYRANY OVER TH3SE STAETS!111! WTF 2 PROV3 THIS LAT FACTS B SUBMITED 2 A CANDID WORLD!!!!! WTF LOL
HE HAS RAFUSAD HIS AS3NT 2 LAWS DA MOST WHOLASOME AND N3C3SARY FOR DA PUBLIC GOD1!!!!!1 LOL
HE HAS FORBIDEN HIS GOVARNORS 2 PAS LAWS OF IM3DIAET AND PR3SNG IMPORTANC3 UNLAS SUSPENDAD IN THEYRE OPERATION TIL HIS AS3NT SHUD B OBTANEAD AND WH3N SO SUSP3NDED HE HAS UTARLY NAGLECT3D 2 ATEND 2 TH3M!1!1 LOL
HA HAS RAFUSED 2 PAS OTHAR LAWS FOR TEH ACOMODATION OF LARG3 DISTRICTS OF PAOPL3 UNLES THOSA PEOPLA WUD R3LINQUISH DA RIGHT OF RAPR3SANTATION IN DA LEGISLATUR3 A RIGHT IENSTIMABLE 2 TH3M AND FORMIDABLE 2 TYRANTS ONLY!!1!!111 WTF LOL
HE HAS CALED 2GATH3R LEGISLATIEV BODEIS AT PLAECS UNUSUAL UNCOMFORTABLE AND DISTANT FROM DA D3POSI2RY OF THEYRE PUBLIC RECORDS FOR DA SOL3 PURPOSE OF FATIGUNG TH3M IN2 COMPLIANCE WIT HIS MEASURES11!1111 LOL
H3 HAS DISOLVED REPRASENTATIEV HOUSES REPAAETDLY FOR OPOSNG WIT MANLY FIRMNES HIS INVASIONS ON TEH RIGHTS OF DA PAOPL3!!111
HE HAS REFUSED FOR A LONG TIEM AFT3R SUCH DISOLUTIONS 2 CAUS3 OTH3RS 2 B ALECTED WHEREBY DA L3GISLATIEV POW3RS INCAPABLE OF ANIHILATION HAEV RATURNED 2 DA PEOPL3 AT LARG3 FOR THEYRE 3XERCIES DA STAET RAMANENG IN TEH MAAN TIEM 3XPOSED 2 AL DA DANG3RS OF INVASION FROM WITHOUT AND CONVULSIONS WITHIN!1!1! WTF
H3 HAS 3NDAAVOURED 2 PREVENT TEH POPULATION OF THASA STAETS FOR TAHT PURPOSE OBSTRUCTNG TEH LAWS FOR NATURALIZATION OF FOR3IGNERS REFUSNG 2 PAS OTH3RS 2 ANCOURAEG THEYRE MIGRATIONS HITHAR AND RASENG TEH CONDITIONS OF NU APROPRIATIONS OF LANDS!!!!! WTF
HE HAS OBSTRUCTED DA ADMINISTRATION OF JUSTIEC BY RAFUSNG HIS AS3NT 2 LAWS FOR ESTABLISHNG JUDICIARY POWARS!!11! WTF
H3 HAS MAED JUDGES D3PENDENT ON HIS WIL ALONA FOR TEH T3NURE OF THEYRE OFIECS AND DA MOUNT AND PAYMANT OF THEYRE SALAREIS11!1 OMG WTF LOL
HE HAS ERECTED A MULTITUDA OF NU OFIECS AND S3NT HITHER SWARMS OF OFIECRS 2 HARAS OUR PEOPLE AND EAT OUT THEYRE SUBSTANCE111!! OMG LOL
H3 HAS KEPT MONG US IN TIEMS OF PEAEC STANDNG ARMEIS WITHOUT DA CONS3NT OF OUR LEGISLATURES!111!! WTF
HA HAS AFECTED 2 R3NDAR DA MILITARY IND3PAND3NT OF AND SUPERIOR 2 TEH CIVIL POWER!!1!1!1! WTF
H3 HAS COMBIEND WIT OTHERS 2 SUBJECT US 2 A JURISDICTION FORAIGN 2 OUR CONSTITUTION AND UNAKNOWLADGAD BY OUR LAWS GIVNG HIS ASENT 2 THEYRE ACTS OF PRATAND3D L3GISLATION
FOR QUART3RNG LARGE BODEIS OF ARM3D TROPS MONG US
FOR PROTACTNG TH3M BY A MOK TRIAL FROM PUNISHM3NT FOR ANY MURDERS WHICH TH3Y SHUD COMIT ON TEH INHABITANTS OF THES3 STAETS
FOR CUTNG OF OUR TRAED WIT AL PARTS OF TEH WORLD
FOR IMPOSNG TAEXS ON US WITHOUT OUR CONSANT
FOR DEPRIVNG US IN MANY CAESS OF TEH BN3FITS OF TRIAL BY JURY
FOR TRANSPORTNG US BYOND SAAS 2 B TREID FOR PR3TAND3D OF3NC3S
FOR ABOLISHNG TEH FRE SYSTEM OF ENGLISH LAWS IN A NEIGHBOURNG PROVINC3 3STABLISHNG THEYRE AN ARBITRARY GOV3RNMENT AND 3NLARGNG ITS BOUNDAREIS SO AS 2 RENDAR IT AT ONCA AN EXMPLE AND FIT INSTRUMANT FOR INTRODUCNG DA SM3 ABSOLUT3 RUL3 IN2 THASE COLONEIS
FOR TAKNG AWAY OUR CHARTERS ABOLISHNG OUR MOST VALUABLA LAWS AND ALT3RNG FUNDM3NTALY TEH FORMS OF OUR GOVARNM3NTS
FOR SUSPANDNG OUR OWN LEGISLATURES AND D3CLARNG THAMSELVES INV3STAD WIT POWER 2 LEGISLAET FOR US IN AL CAESS WUT!1!111! OMG WTF
H3 HAS ABDICAETD GOV3RNMANT HER3 BY DECLARNG US OUT OF HIS PROTACTION AND WAGNG WAR AGANEST US!111 OMG WTF LOL
HE HAS PLUNDER3D OUR S3AS RAVAEGD OUR COASTS BURNT OUR 2WNS AND D3STROYAD TEH LIEVS OF OUR PEOPLE111!!1!! WTF
H3 IS AT THIS TIEM TRANSPORTNG LARGE ARMEIS OF FOR3IGN MARCENAREIS 2 COMPL3AT TEH WORKS OF D3ATH DASOLATION AND TYRANY ALREADY BGUN WIT CIRCUMSTANCES OF CRUELTY AND P3RFIDY SCARCELY PARAL3LED IN TEH MOST BARBAROUS AEGS AND 2TALY UNWORTHY DA HEAD OF A CIVILIEZD NATION!!!!1! WTF
HA HAS CONSTRANEAD OUR F3LOW CITIEZNS TAEKN CAPTIEV ON TEH HIGH S3AS 2 BAR ARMS AGANEST THEYRE COUNTRY 2 BCOME TEH EXACUTIONERS OF THEYRE FREINDS AND BR3THREN OR 2 FAL THAMSELVES BY THEYRE HANDS111!! OMG WTF
H3 HAS EXCIETD DOMASTIC INSURACTIONS MONGST US AND HAS ENDAAVOURED 2 BRNG ON TEH INHABITANTS OF OUR FRONTEIRS TEH MERCIELS INDIAN SAVAEGS WHOSE KNOWN RUL3 OF WARFAER IS AN UNDISTNGUISH3D DESTRUCTION OF AL AEGS SEXES AND CONDITIONS!!1! OMG LOL
IN EVARY STAEG OF THES3 OPR3SIONS WE HAEV PETITIONAD FOR R3DRES IN TEH MOST HUMBLE T3RMS OUR RAPEAETD PETITIONS HAEV B3N ANSWARED ONLY BY R3P3AETD INJURY!!!1!11 A PRINCA WHOSE CHARACTER IS THUS MARKED BY 3VERY ACT WHICH MAY DEFIEN A TYRANT IS UNFIT 2 B TEH RULAR OF A FRE PEOPLE111!!
NOR HAEV W3 B3N WANTNG IN ATENTIONS 2 OUR BRITISH BRETHR3N!!!!! OMG WTF LOL WE HAEV WARNED TH3M FROM TIEM 2 TIEM OF ATEMPTS BY THERE L3GISLATURA 2 3XTEND AN UNWARANTABLE JURISDICTION OVER US1!11!!1! OMG WA HAEV R3MIND3D THEM OF DA CIRCUMSTANCES OF OUR AMIGRATION AND S3TLAMENT HERE11!11 OMG WTF W3 HAEV APEAELD 2 THERE NATIEV JUSTIEC AND MAGNANIMITY AND WE HAEV CONJUR3D TH3M BY TEH TEIS OF OUR COMON KINDRED 2 DISAVOW THESE USURPATIONS WHICH WUD IENVITABLY INT3RUPT OUR CONECTIONS AND CORASPONDENC31!!111 WTF THEY 2 HAEV BEN D3AF 2 TEH VOIEC OF JUSTIEC AND OF CONSANGUINITY!!!11 OMG LOL WE MUST THEYRE ACQUEISCE IN DA NEC3SITY WHICH DANOUNCES OUR SEPARATION AND HOLD THEM AS WE HOLD TEH REST OF MANKIND 3N3MEIS IN WAR IN PEAEC FREINDS1!111 OMG WTF
WA THEYRE DA REPR3SENTATIEVS OF TEH UNIETD STAETS OF M3RICA IN GANERAL CONGRES ASEMBLED AP3ALNG 2 TEH SUPREME JUDG3 OF TEH WORLD FOR DA RECTITUDE OF OUR INT3NTIONS DO IN DA NME AND BY DA AUTHORITY OF DA GOD PAOPLA OF TH3SE COLONEIS SOLEMNLY PUBLISH AND DECLAER TAHT THESA UNIETD COLONEIS AER AND OF RIGHT OUGHT 2 B FRE AND IND3PEND3NT STAETS TAHT THEY R ABSOLV3D FROM AL ALEGIANC3 2 DA BRITISH CROWN AND TAHT AL POLITICAL CONACTION BTWEN THEM AND DA STAET OF GREAT BRITANE IS AND OUGHT 2 B 2TALY DISOLVED AND TAHT AS FRE AND INDEP3NDENT STAETS THAY HAEV FUL POW3R 2 L3VY WAR CONCLUDE P3AEC CONTRACT ALIANCES ESTABLISH COMARCE AND 2 DO AL OTH3R ACTS AND THNGS WHICH IND3PEND3NT STAETS MAY OF RIGHT DO!11!11! OMG WTF AND FOR TEH SUPORT OF THIS D3CLARATION WIT A FIRM RALIANCE ON TEH PROTECTION OF DIVIEN PROVIEDNCE W3 MUTUALY PL3DGE 2 AACH OTHAR OUR LIEVS OUR FORTUN3S AND OUR SACRED HONOR!!11!1 LOL
