"At your job, does anyone ever say to you "Somebody's got a case of the Mondays!"?"
"Naw man. Hell no. I believe you could get your ass kicked for asking sometihing like that."
"It's a JUMP to CONCLUSIONS mat!! You see, you have this mat, with different CONCLUSIONS written on it that you could JUMP TO!"
"There WAS nothing wrong with it. Until I was about 12 years old, and that no-talent-ass-clown because famous and started winning Grammys."
"Do you like wearing those?"
"What these? They're my pieces of Flair."
"Peter didn't you GET that memo on the TPS reports?"
"We're not going to some white collar resort prison. No, no, no! We're going to federal POUND ME IN THE ASS prison!"