do you know anyone that can't burp?

[Eli]

Not being able to burp would quickly result in one of two things:

1) Extreme flatulence

2) Death

 

[meltdown75]

Originally posted by: Eli
Not being able to burp would quickly result in one of two things:

1) Extreme flatulence

2) Death

Eli, don't be a silly goose.

 

[nakedfrog]

Once in a while I have some difficulty getting one out, and that's not fun.

 

[Patt]

Two of my best friends just can't burp ... back in the day when we'd be out drinking, the 'regular' folk among us would be pounding the beers, and ripping out the requisite belches. These two would have to go slow, much to their chagrin, and if they tried going too fast, it was vomit or nothing.

Interestingly though, these two are the most flatulent bastards I've ever met ... wondering if your wife is the same? They seem to be getting better at processing that gas out the other end.

 

[mrSHEiK124]

Originally posted by: Patt
Interestingly though, these two are the most flatulent bastards I've ever met ... wondering if your wife is the same? They seem to be getting better at processing that gas out the other end.

I thought they weren't the same "gases." Burps come from higher up in your GI tract than farts, which would have to come from your large intestine given how they smell like, well, shit.

I had a friend in high school who could not burp. He would be in severe pain and have to lie down after a can of soda. Then he lost some weight, and we managed to get him to understand the "swallow air, expel air" thing, and he burped. It was a pussy ass burp. Candleja

 

[silverpig]

My wife can't sneeze. Her body goes through the motions, but she can't let it out. She just holds it in, says she's doing it right, and tells me to shut up. She's cute.

 

[mrSHEiK124]

Originally posted by: silverpig
My wife can't sneeze. Her body goes through the motions, but she can't let it out. She just holds it in, says she's doing it right, and tells me to shut up. She's cute.

http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1803422

Is that your wife?

 

[child of wonder]

I burp too much. Too bad we can't average out.

 

[SunnyD]

My sister in law... she had gastric surgery a while back. She occasionally gets one that slides out, but never on purpose lest she revisit the last meal she had.

My 6 year old on the other hand... she would put pretty much all of you to shame.

 

[meltdown75]

Originally posted by: Patt
Two of my best friends just can't burp ... back in the day when we'd be out drinking, the 'regular' folk among us would be pounding the beers, and ripping out the requisite belches. These two would have to go slow, much to their chagrin, and if they tried going too fast, it was vomit or nothing.

Interestingly though, these two are the most flatulent bastards I've ever met ... wondering if your wife is the same? They seem to be getting better at processing that gas out the other end.

she's not very farty at all. i've never heard her rip one. poor thing

 

[Juddog]

I have the controlled ability to burp at will. This is by controlling my cardiac sphincter to willingly open or close. I can open it to allow air direct passage into my stomach, then push it back out again as well. I believe that a person can learn how to do this through study.

 

[Fritzo]

I can't. It just comes out as silent gas.

 

[Patt]

Originally posted by: meltdown75

Originally posted by: Patt
Two of my best friends just can't burp ... back in the day when we'd be out drinking, the 'regular' folk among us would be pounding the beers, and ripping out the requisite belches. These two would have to go slow, much to their chagrin, and if they tried going too fast, it was vomit or nothing.

Interestingly though, these two are the most flatulent bastards I've ever met ... wondering if your wife is the same? They seem to be getting better at processing that gas out the other end.

she's not very farty at all. i've never heard her rip one. poor thing

Well ... my 8 week old daughter seems to respond really well to Ovol, or Infacol ... apparently they help break gas up into smaller units that can then be expelled easier.

Ovol.ca
Infacol

Maybe there is an adult version?

 

[mb]

Interesting. Before reading this thread, if someone where to tell me that they cannot burp I would not believe them.

 

[Evryothrnmwstkn]

I am 25 years old and have had all the same problems with not being able to burp my whole life and having stomach problems because of it. I have actually learned to burp. It's strange and amazing. I suspect there to be something physically similar that all of us have in common that kept it from being a natural reaction, but at least with me... over the last 4 months or so, I've gotten to the point where I can actually burp when I need to most of the time. I still can't belch on command or burp the ABCs, but when I feel the need to burp, I can do certain things with my chest, shoulders, neck, jaw, and throat to make a burp happen (sounds more complicated than it actually is once I got the hang of it). Sometimes they're small and sometimes they are big. It did not completely fix my stomache problems, but it is better and i can now better understand which foods upset my stomach, and I can explain it in no other way than to say that it is absolutely glorious. I'm interested to see if I can help anyone else learn how to do this. Feel free to email me at bobcannowburp@gmail.com if you would like more information and assistance learning to burp. I hope your search turns out as well as mine did.

 

[n7]

Necromancer!

 

[EMPshockwave82]

Originally posted by: Mo0o
Yeah there's not much you can do about. Just avoid consuming a ton of carbonated beverages. Sucks for me because I look like a huge wuss w/ beer even though its the carbonation and not the alcohol that's getting to me.

Yep, I'm the same way. Can't burp. When I do finally get a burp when I'm drinking it sounds like I'm about to throw up. It gets all the gas out and makes me feel like a new man but it sounds terrible.

 

[Alone]

I used to not be able to burp. Now I do it almost religiously.

Not sure what happened.

 

[TripleAAA]

Another non-burper here. I have maybe burped like 5 times in my entire life and they have all been really small and generally when I'm coming down with a flu or something.

PM me if you got tips, I'd love to be able to.

 

[zinfamous]

Originally posted by: Evryothrnmwstkn
I am 25 years old and have had all the same problems with not being able to burp my whole life and having stomach problems because of it. I have actually learned to burp. It's strange and amazing. I suspect there to be something physically similar that all of us have in common that kept it from being a natural reaction, but at least with me... over the last 4 months or so, I've gotten to the point where I can actually burp when I need to most of the time. I still can't belch on command or burp the ABCs, but when I feel the need to burp, I can do certain things with my chest, shoulders, neck, jaw, and throat to make a burp happen (sounds more complicated than it actually is once I got the hang of it). Sometimes they're small and sometimes they are big. It did not completely fix my stomache problems, but it is better and i can now better understand which foods upset my stomach, and I can explain it in no other way than to say that it is absolutely glorious. I'm interested to see if I can help anyone else learn how to do this. Feel free to email me at bobcannowburp@gmail.com if you would like more information and assistance learning to burp. I hope your search turns out as well as mine did.

this is perhaps the coolest free iPod promo I've ever seen.

well done, sir.

 

[Gunslinger08]

Same exact thing happens to me. Can't burp, but get gurgly sounds from gas slowly building up.

 

[guyver01]

i've always wondered...

are non-burpers heavy farters?


they gotta do something with all that extra air buildup. don't they?

 

[Evryothrnmwstkn]

Aren't free iPod promo's usually websites that you have to go to... and then jump through hoops? I wish I could take the cuddos for that, because that would be a pretty intense process to fake... however, it is real. I have posted this on numerous sites, and didn't plan on coming back to any of them. So, if I had simply left the following information on how I learned and didn't leave contact info, then they would not be able to get back to me. Unfortunately, I've found that a lot of these forums take out your email address, so I had to start looking through all the ones I posted on to see if there were comments... if I wanted to actually be helpful instead of simply a tease at hope. So, I'll go ahead and leave the information I've been emailing to those trusting enough to email me...




Alright, well I know that it may not be the same thing for everyone, but this is what I've found.

The biggest thing for me to learn was torso, shoulder, neck, head, and jaw placement to allow a burp through. I have to be at least sitting up straight or leaning forward slightly is even better. Can't do it while sitting back. I have to push my shoulders straight back, the further the better. And then I have to push my head forward and then chin down. At first it helped me to turn my head left to right while my chin was down and head out. It also helps open my throat if I open my mouth slightly and push my jaw forward, like giving myself an under bite. Regarding throat muscles and relaxation, I've found that the only thing that I was familiar with that is similar to "opening my throat" would be a yawn. So if I position myself in the way specified above, and then make myself yawn, the first part of the yawn (before it takes over and you feel like you have to yawn) is when I will burp.

It took me probably 3 months to realize that full list of motions after I started getting a little bit of control. As odd as it all sounds if I have even one of those incorrect, I usually can't burp, or the burp is miserably small and useless.

This only works for me when I need to burp. I can't burp on command, but if I've just drank half of a Mountain Dew and feel like I need to burp, I simply make sure to be sitting/standing up or leaning forward slightly, push my shoulders back, touch my chin to my chest, and then right when I feel like it should be hitting my throat, I push my head forward (while still keeping my chin down), open my mouth slightly and push my jaw out and start the yawn feeling in my throat. Once I got the hang of it, I learned that by having breathed some air into my diaphragm, I could push out a larger burp by using that air in my diaphragm to push on the burp. I didn't learn that until I got the hang of smaller burps.

I don't know if this is common with others or not, but I've got a bit of an overbite and some sinus problems. For as long as I can remember I've gotten phlegm stuck in my throat and have to spit it out... and the more stuff in my throat, the less likely I am to be able to burp as well.

Hope this is something that can be helpful. I'd like to know if it is. Keep me posted. Bobcannowburp@gmail.com

Bob

 

[manowar821]

I can't burp.

 

[yhelothar]

I desperately want to learn how to burp. I frequently feel bloated after a meal and often I would feel so bloated that it'd trigger my gag reflex and I'd puke out the air if you will. But it creates another gamble and lose situation for me.