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Do you get overly self-conscious with maryjane?

yhelothar

yhelothar

Lifer
Well I used to completely not give a shit what people think of me. I found it easy to be myself and be comfortable with myself, and I was socially comfortable.

About 1.5yrs ago, I started to become self conscious. It was gradual, and I could feel myself more and more empty around people.

Eventually, I became so empty that I couldn't socialize with anyone. I was awkward around everyone and everyone was awkward around me.

I had a flood of self critical thoughts about myself. I smoked about a few times a month 1.5yrs ago... but ended up smoking several times a week about a year ago.

About half a year to a year ago, I realized that this self-criticalness wasn't really personal development, but rather was just personal destruction. I really tried to stop being self critical. It worked quite a bit, but I find that often when I smoke, I get self conscious thoughts flooding my mind again.

Anyone have similar experiences?
 
When I used to blaze, I would be very anti-social. The only people I'd want to be around were other stoners.

Alcohol = social drug. It also doesnt revert your brain to that of a 3 year old. Winner.
 
Sounds like it may not be for you. It shouldn't cause self-destructive thoughts.

Being paranoid is part of the marijuana high. It manifests itself differently for different people. Some people can't handle it, it makes them paranoid to be point of being anxious, or other undesirable things.

They are the exceptions, though.
 
1) You are definitely high right now.
2) Do you do anything? Exercise, work? I can see myself saying the same things you are when I am in periods of complete inactivity. I usually get self critical at those times and it is annoying.

edit: and I say this because you aren't talking about being self conscious while high, but just in general and then you want to tie it to the pot you smoke very now and then. I think it could be a combination of things.
 
I'm actually not high right now, but I just watched stoners act like total nuts being absolutely paranoid from the movie pineapple express.

but #2 really hit the dot for me. I applied to dozens of places but didn't get any of them. Ended up sitting at home being a pothead all day.
But that was when things bottomed out for me. I had a job when it started, and that was tutoring where I really had to watch what I said when around the kids.
 
Yes, I have experienced this, but drugs like cannabis (and to a much greater extent LSD and mushrooms and other powerful hallucenagens) depend very much on setting. If you smoke, or trip, around your close friends or family you will be *very* comfortable and social. Right? It's when around other random people that it gets uncomfortable. This I think is just an extension of the slight stress anyone normally feels when talking to new people.

Fix? Smoke when you get home - drink, or whatever, when you go out.
 
Originally posted by: Ocguy31
When I used to blaze, I would be very anti-social. The only people I'd want to be around were other stoners.

Alcohol = social drug. It also doesnt revert your brain to that of a 3 year old. Winner.
Click to expand...

It's a mixed bag for me. Around people I'm naturally comfortable around with, I get waay more social. It takes away all inhibitions for me. And I get a lot more creative in my socialization too.

But for people I don't feel all that comfortable with, I'll completely withdrawal and bug them out.

Well actually any positive effect I get with weed, I get the opposite negative effect later on too eventually when I smoke for long enough.
 
Last time I lit up, I ended up playing guitar hero drumset for an hour straight with no TV on.

Smoke better shit.
 
Originally posted by: JM Aggie08
Last time I lit up, I ended up playing guitar hero drumset for an hour straight with no TV on.

Smoke better shit.
Click to expand...

:laugh::laugh:
 
I get very anxious and quiet when I smoke, and I don't really have any reason to be either. I don't smoke often at all, so when I do smoke I usually take too much. On average I probably chance it once a month/two months because I am with a bunch of friends who are ALL stoned, and it's enjoyable. If someone isn't smoking though, I join them.
 
sometimes i get a bit paranoid that maybe i said something that was interpreted incorrectly or that i wreak of weed but then i eat some chocolate and think "chocolate chocolate chocolate chocolate chocolate..."
 
It definitely removes a layer of subconscious ignorance of reality at times. You seldom realize how much your brain ignores emotions and thoughts that are hurtful in some way, shape or form and commits them to the subconscious. When you get high and start to think, I find you explore different avenues of thought than you would sober, and often you end up thinking in a very self-critical fashion. If it affects you like that, don't smoke until you feel comfortable with yourself and those around you, and you'll have a much better time with it. Like any drug, it's key to respect it and use it in moderation. Your definition of moderation is up to you. 😉
 
Originally posted by: scott916
It definitely removes a layer of subconscious ignorance of reality at times. You seldom realize how much your brain ignores emotions and thoughts that are hurtful in some way, shape or form and commits them to the subconscious. When you get high and start to think, I find you explore different avenues of thought than you would sober, and often you end up thinking in a very self-critical fashion. If it affects you like that, don't smoke until you feel comfortable with yourself and those around you, and you'll have a much better time with it. Like any drug, it's key to respect it and use it in moderation. Your definition of moderation is up to you. 😉
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That's a good way of putting it in words.
I felt like a lot of what I saw at first was revelations in becoming a better person that I was subconsciously ignorant of.
But too much self criticalness can only do bad. It may expand us to become more dynamic of a person, but becoming a jack of all trades, master of none often makes things shallow.
 
He who sits and broods about his problems misses life going by. Pot's a great drug in the right setting, but sitting home and getting high all day is roughly akin to someone who can't let go of the bottle, but in a mental rather than physical sense. Use it to open up those new avenues in your brain for creativity and appreciation of art/music instead of criticism and you'll be on the right path. 🙂
 
:music:
Last dance with mary jane
One more time to kill the pain
I feel summer creepin in and im
Tired of this town again:music:
 
Originally posted by: Eli
Sounds like it may not be for you. It shouldn't cause self-destructive thoughts.

Being paranoid is part of the marijuana high. It manifests itself differently for different people. Some people can't handle it, it makes them paranoid to be point of being anxious, or other undesirable things.

They are the exceptions, though.
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This is what I came in here to say.

Also, as you grow older, and grow up, the paranoia increases because the fear of damage to your reputation becomes more real.

 
Yeah except I ignore it, knowing its because I smoked. But for me, I am where I want to be with my life, so it will be hard to have critical thoughts. I also ONLY smoke at night, a couple of hours before bed, and on weekends. I have never been high when at work, school, or doing homework... I use it as a reward for doing everything I am supposed to do... I know its lame, but I really think it helps me more than it hurts for the time being.
 
Originally posted by: moshquerade
Originally posted by: Eli
Sounds like it may not be for you. It shouldn't cause self-destructive thoughts.

Being paranoid is part of the marijuana high. It manifests itself differently for different people. Some people can't handle it, it makes them paranoid to be point of being anxious, or other undesirable things.

They are the exceptions, though.
Click to expand...

This is what I came in here to say.

Also, as you grow older, and grow up, the paranoia increases because the fear of damage to your reputation becomes more real.
Click to expand...

I was surprised to see certain type of people smoke, I would never thought they would... they were worried about reputation ...lol
But I do a little.
 
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