Fireball77
Senior member
I started seeing a girl, things are going good. My friends tend to plan things last minute. I tell them I cannot go, I get harrassed.
Let me just itemize the events that have happened.
1. Friend calls at 10:30 one night, says to meet him at Denny's, I say I am going to pass, He gets mad at me, says our other friend is only in town for the night. I did not even know the friend was in town. Didnt care to see her anyways. So I said I was passing, I am getting ready for bed. He gets all mad, and threatens to have another friend harrass me about not going. I tell him whatever, and the phone call ends.
2. Another friend messages me saying that is too bad that I cannot go to the game....I am like, What game? He said the friend from #1 said I couldnt go. I was never told about the game. I told him I never knew about it. So I write the friend from #1 a e-mail asking him what the deal is. That I never treated him this way when he started seeing his gf, and why is he treating me this way. I never gave him any problems when couldnt hangout. I was happy for him. And why is having other friends, harass me about not hanging out. And why is he telling people I cannot go when I am not being told about things. He writes back and tells me he is sorry, and was just joking, but did apologize for what happened in #1, and said the other friend is just joking.
3. Friday night, we were all supposed to get together to plan our annual baseball trip. Well we are all to meet Friday night at 10, 10:30 comes around, I dont hear anything. I tried calling 2 different people. No answer. I turn off my phone and end up going to bed. They both left voice messages at midnight. One friend said he got into town late. And friend from #1 said he was at a movie, but did not ask me to go, because he did not think I can go. I got these the next day. Friday was the only night that I planned on going out with them.
4. Saturday, friend from #1 calls and says they are meeting at his house at 10 that night to discuss the trip. I was out of town, and busy, so I did not call back. Well I got in from out of town at about 10. As I was bringing things into the house, friend from #2 calls and leaves me an voicemail. Saying I am ditching the group, and not hanging out and not being a friend. The my other friend calls like 3 minutes later, asks if I am coming over. I told him no, that I had other plans, which I did. He hangs up on me. My girlfiend is like, I better go, she doesnt want them to think she is keeping me from them. Which she is not, btw. So I am getting ready to go over, and my friend who hung up on me calls, and starts bitching at me, asking if I am going on the trip or not, and just being a real dick with me. At that point I was ready to say no. But we argue a bit, and I told him I was headed over before he called. Well I get there, hardly anyone says anything to me.
5. Monday, I message friend from #1 and tell him about a camping trip that his cousin and I are planning. And he hemhaws about going, we had been talking about it for about a year. And says he may go to the coast. I am like, you can go to the coast anytime (he has a house at the coast), go camping with us. Then he goes off on me asking me what my deal is and why am I harrassing him about not going camping when they do it to me, I am bent out of shape. We start arguing, I tell him that friends should not treat friends this way, and that he knew it was upsetting me, he should of said something to the other guys. He was there when they did what they did. So this continues, and I realize that it isnt going anywhere, and that we should just drop it. He wouldnt. I tried 3 more times to let things go. He still would not. I end by telling him I will see him around.
So now, I am at the point to where I dont even want to go on the trip with them. I feel they are not giving me the same respect I have given them. And when I tried talking to my friend about it, it turned into a fight. And if they are joking, I am not seeing the joke. I have told them it is not funny. It is getting old. The thing is, we are not in highschool or college anymore, we are 28-29 years old. I dont feel like going out super late at night. I am enjoying going to bed early, doing the family thing with the GF. Hanging out with more mature people. I feel I have outgrown them, and their humor. One friend who is married w/ kids is going through similar things that I am with the group also. So I am not the only target. And he is sort of on the same page as I, with the hanging out bit.
As of now, I have not said I am not going on the trip. But I have no desire to go, and can use the thousand dollars to do something else. What are your guys thoughts. Sorry if this is long, but this has been really bothering me.
Let me just itemize the events that have happened.
1. Friend calls at 10:30 one night, says to meet him at Denny's, I say I am going to pass, He gets mad at me, says our other friend is only in town for the night. I did not even know the friend was in town. Didnt care to see her anyways. So I said I was passing, I am getting ready for bed. He gets all mad, and threatens to have another friend harrass me about not going. I tell him whatever, and the phone call ends.
2. Another friend messages me saying that is too bad that I cannot go to the game....I am like, What game? He said the friend from #1 said I couldnt go. I was never told about the game. I told him I never knew about it. So I write the friend from #1 a e-mail asking him what the deal is. That I never treated him this way when he started seeing his gf, and why is he treating me this way. I never gave him any problems when couldnt hangout. I was happy for him. And why is having other friends, harass me about not hanging out. And why is he telling people I cannot go when I am not being told about things. He writes back and tells me he is sorry, and was just joking, but did apologize for what happened in #1, and said the other friend is just joking.
3. Friday night, we were all supposed to get together to plan our annual baseball trip. Well we are all to meet Friday night at 10, 10:30 comes around, I dont hear anything. I tried calling 2 different people. No answer. I turn off my phone and end up going to bed. They both left voice messages at midnight. One friend said he got into town late. And friend from #1 said he was at a movie, but did not ask me to go, because he did not think I can go. I got these the next day. Friday was the only night that I planned on going out with them.
4. Saturday, friend from #1 calls and says they are meeting at his house at 10 that night to discuss the trip. I was out of town, and busy, so I did not call back. Well I got in from out of town at about 10. As I was bringing things into the house, friend from #2 calls and leaves me an voicemail. Saying I am ditching the group, and not hanging out and not being a friend. The my other friend calls like 3 minutes later, asks if I am coming over. I told him no, that I had other plans, which I did. He hangs up on me. My girlfiend is like, I better go, she doesnt want them to think she is keeping me from them. Which she is not, btw. So I am getting ready to go over, and my friend who hung up on me calls, and starts bitching at me, asking if I am going on the trip or not, and just being a real dick with me. At that point I was ready to say no. But we argue a bit, and I told him I was headed over before he called. Well I get there, hardly anyone says anything to me.
5. Monday, I message friend from #1 and tell him about a camping trip that his cousin and I are planning. And he hemhaws about going, we had been talking about it for about a year. And says he may go to the coast. I am like, you can go to the coast anytime (he has a house at the coast), go camping with us. Then he goes off on me asking me what my deal is and why am I harrassing him about not going camping when they do it to me, I am bent out of shape. We start arguing, I tell him that friends should not treat friends this way, and that he knew it was upsetting me, he should of said something to the other guys. He was there when they did what they did. So this continues, and I realize that it isnt going anywhere, and that we should just drop it. He wouldnt. I tried 3 more times to let things go. He still would not. I end by telling him I will see him around.
So now, I am at the point to where I dont even want to go on the trip with them. I feel they are not giving me the same respect I have given them. And when I tried talking to my friend about it, it turned into a fight. And if they are joking, I am not seeing the joke. I have told them it is not funny. It is getting old. The thing is, we are not in highschool or college anymore, we are 28-29 years old. I dont feel like going out super late at night. I am enjoying going to bed early, doing the family thing with the GF. Hanging out with more mature people. I feel I have outgrown them, and their humor. One friend who is married w/ kids is going through similar things that I am with the group also. So I am not the only target. And he is sort of on the same page as I, with the hanging out bit.
As of now, I have not said I am not going on the trip. But I have no desire to go, and can use the thousand dollars to do something else. What are your guys thoughts. Sorry if this is long, but this has been really bothering me.
