Do you clog the toilet often?

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spidey07

No Lifer
Aug 4, 2000
65,469
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Lamont Burns said:
No you didn't.
Click to expand...

I'll see what I can do.

Pics of the scale beforehand, pics on the scale afterwards and of course the turd. I've been eating nothing but chili and grilled cheese along with cheese dip since sunday (leftover superbowl party food) so it's the perfect storm.
 
SunSamurai

SunSamurai

Diamond Member
Jan 16, 2005
3,914
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Holy crap.

My colon doesnt store 'food' that long. Most is maybe 3 days with no poo.


You people are shitting gods.
 
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Lamont Burns

Platinum Member
Dec 13, 2002
2,836
0
0
spidey07 said:
I'll see what I can do.

Pics of the scale beforehand, pics on the scale afterwards and of course the turd. I've been eating nothing but chili and grilled cheese along with cheese dip since sunday (leftover superbowl party food) so it's the perfect storm.
Click to expand...

that works. i'll take PM proof if you can't post it in the forum
 
D

darkxshade

Lifer
Mar 31, 2001
13,749
6
81
I've done the turd vacuum, the great thing about it is that you can play a game during the flush. Basically you try hard not to pinch your ass so that you don't sausage your streaming poo and see if you can last longer than the flush itself. Great pastime I must say.
 
HumblePie

HumblePie

Lifer
Oct 30, 2000
14,665
440
126
I used to when I used to wipe after deucing and before flushing. Now I deuce, flush, wipe, and flush again.

I will say that even then I have clogged a toilet. Worst was when I had a deuce with a 4 or 5 inch diameter. Man that sucker hurt. Had to use a clothes hanger to chop it up so it would go down. I didn't realize it was so big, despite the pain, that it got stuck halfway through the opening of the drain.

Turds that epic are rare though. The more common clogging is when I get hit with diarrhea and so much comes out that it all can't be flushed at once. I try flushing as fast as possible as it sprays out but sometimes I'm so busy dealing with the cramps I can't get my arm to move the lever behind me. Nothing is worse then having diarrhea stack up so high in a toilet it touches your butt and mountains up over the edge of the seat. I had to get a big styrofoam cup the last time that happened to dig some out temporarily so I could get the rest to flush in smaller increments.
 
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Lamont Burns

Platinum Member
Dec 13, 2002
2,836
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i turd flush at work when it's busy in the bathroom. the flush noise drowns out my gaseous discharge noises as my sphincter plays a hymn of relief.
 
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Lamont Burns

Platinum Member
Dec 13, 2002
2,836
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HumblePie said:
I used to when I used to wipe after deucing and before flushing. Now I deuce, flush, wipe, and flush again.

I will say that even then I have clogged a toilet. Worst was when I had a deuce with a 4 or 5 inch diameter. Man that sucker hurt. Had to use a clothes hanger to chop it up so it would go down. I didn't realize it was so big, despite the pain, that it got stuck halfway through the opening of the drain.

Turds that epic are rare though. The more common clogging is when I get hit with diarrhea and so much comes out that it all can't be flushed at once. I try flushing as fast as possible as it sprays out but sometimes I'm so busy dealing with the cramps I can't get my arm to move the lever behind me. Nothing is worse then having diarrhea stack up so high in a toilet it touches your butt and mountains up over the edge of the seat. I had to get a big styrofoam cup the last time that happened to dig some out temporarily so I could get the rest to flush in smaller increments.
Click to expand...

maybe take off the stormtrooper outfit first
 
Scouzer

Scouzer

Lifer
Jun 3, 2001
10,358
5
0
TallBill said:
No, I created a method of flushing that avoids clogging. Simply flush the toilet as your feces begins exiting your body. The turd gets sucked down, no problem, regardless of its size. Plus it makes wiping easier since you don't have to pinch.
Click to expand...

I'm a stand wiper. I don't like the cool breeze and light splashing of a toilet when I sit and flush. This method fails for me.
 
M

Modular

Diamond Member
Jul 1, 2005
5,027
67
91
HumblePie said:
Turds that epic are rare though. The more common clogging is when I get hit with diarrhea and so much comes out that it all can't go. I try flushing as fast as possible as it sprays out but sometimes I'm so busy dealing with the cramps I can't get my arm to move the lever behind me. Nothing is worse then having diarrhea stack up so high in a toilet it touches your butt and mountains up over the edge of the seat. I had to get a big styrofoam cup the last time that happened to dig some out temporarily so I could get the rest to flush in smaller increments.
Click to expand...

D:

:eek:

:awe:


I take some massive dumps. In my apartment, I rarely had clogging problems, but these toilets in my house a fucking awful. I've dealt with more clogs in the past 5 months than I've dealt with in my whole prior existence. The wife and I are replacing everything in both bathrooms. We're talking from floor to tub and ceiling tiles. I'm getting the $250 flushes a bucket of golf balls model and I can't wait!
 
JM Aggie08

JM Aggie08

Diamond Member
Jan 3, 2006
8,420
1,009
136
I find it ironic that I'm sitting on a toilet at work readin this from my Bold.

Carry on.
 
HumblePie

HumblePie

Lifer
Oct 30, 2000
14,665
440
126
chusteczka said:
Your story did not disappoint. Although I expected a stripper girlfriend to work its way into the story. :)
Click to expand...

Meh, that's so 6 years ago.

Speaking of which, the styro foam cup turd was when I was working at Compusa about that long ago. At least it was the end of the night but I think it was the Whattaburger I had. I think it was a triple meat and cheese with everything burger at the time. It hit me near closing time and I was in there for like an hour or so. The janitor walked in and started retching noises as he quickly ran out.
 
daw123

daw123

Platinum Member
Aug 30, 2008
2,593
0
0
The bogs at work are not very good.

Someone last year did a ten-flusher. That log is by far the best I've seen (it had an 80mm diameter). The perpetrator must have had a sore ring piece afterward. It was teamwork between myself and several others to flush that bastard away.

Then several days later we got an eight-flusher. Presumably the same person who laid the first stumpy. I'm surprised we didn't hear groans emanating from the lav as the person made his deposit, since it must have hurt like SOB.
 
HumblePie

HumblePie

Lifer
Oct 30, 2000
14,665
440
126
Hey guys cool it with the thread crapping. If you want to offer a lowball flush do it in PM.
 
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darkxshade

Lifer
Mar 31, 2001
13,749
6
81
There's this gay guy at work who clogs the toilet everytime he goes and doesn't bother to clean it up... I walked into his stall once and the deuces were shaped like soda cans I shit you not. :eek:
 
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