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Dirtbag Gourmet: A Guide to Cannibalism

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OutHouse

OutHouse

Lifer
yum yum, happy Friday!!!


http://www.adventure-journal.com/2012/01/dirtbag-gourmet-a-guide-to-cannibalism/

671px-Cannibalism_1571.png
 
Two cannibals are eating a man, one starting from the head the other from the feet.

A few minutes into their feast the one who started from the head says to the one who started at the feet,"How's it going down their?".

The other answers,"I'm having a ball!".

To which the answer is,"Slow down you're going to fast!"
 
Two cannibals meet one day. The first cannibal says, "You know, I just can't seem to get a tender Missionary. I've baked them, I've roasted them, I've stewed them, I've barbecued them, I've tried every sort of marinade. I just cannot seem to get them tender."

The second cannibal asks, "What kind of Missionary do you use?"

The other replied, "You know, the ones that hang out at that place at the bend of the river. They have those brown cloaks with a rope around the waist and they're sort of bald on top with a funny ring of hair on their heads."

"Ah, ha!" the second cannibal replies. "No wonder ... those are friars!"
 
One day, 3 men were captured by cannibals and were brought to the chief. The Chief told them to get 10 of one kind of fruit and sends them off.

The 1st guy comes back with 10 apples. The chief then tells him that he has to stick all 10 apples up his butt without any expression or he will be killed and eaten. The 1st guy sticks in the first apple with great struggle but managed to get it in. Then he went for the second one but winced out in pain and was killed.

The 2nd guy came back with 10 berries. The chief explained the rules and the 2nd guy was putting them in one by one, 1....2...3...4....5...6....7...8...9... and as soon as he was getting to the tenth berry.., he laughed hysterically and was killed.

The 1st and 2nd guy meet in Heaven. The 1st guy asks the 2nd guy, " Why did you laugh?! You almost made it!!!". And the 2nd guy replied, "I couldn't help it... I saw the 3rd guy coming with pineapples !!!"
 
the picture is not cannibalism, it's how they used to execute people. hang, draw and quarter. very popular in england
 
alent1234 said:
the picture is not cannibalism, it's how they used to execute people. hang, draw and quarter. very popular in england
Click to expand...

?? ok then whats up with the dude eating the babys head and the other dude and woman eating the upper torso of a guy?
 
Last edited:
rudder said:
One day, 3 men were captured by cannibals and were brought to the chief. The Chief told them to get 10 of one kind of fruit and sends them off.

The 1st guy comes back with 10 apples. The chief then tells him that he has to stick all 10 apples up his butt without any expression or he will be killed and eaten. The 1st guy sticks in the first apple with great struggle but managed to get it in. Then he went for the second one but winced out in pain and was killed.

The 2nd guy came back with 10 berries. The chief explained the rules and the 2nd guy was putting them in one by one, 1....2...3...4....5...6....7...8...9... and as soon as he was getting to the tenth berry.., he laughed hysterically and was killed.

The 1st and 2nd guy meet in Heaven. The 1st guy asks the 2nd guy, " Why did you laugh?! You almost made it!!!". And the 2nd guy replied, "I couldn't help it... I saw the 3rd guy coming with pineapples !!!"
Click to expand...


lol +1
 
what's the name of the picture?

you can clearly see gallows in the background and other torture/execution devices

as a guess i'd say this is from the netherlands during their long revolution in the 1500's or 1600's and the people being killed are done so for treason
 
Two cannibals were eating a clown. One cannibal turns to the other and says "I don't know about you, but I think this tastes kind of funny".
 
rudder said:
Two cannibals meet one day. The first cannibal says, "You know, I just can't seem to get a tender Missionary. I've baked them, I've roasted them, I've stewed them, I've barbecued them, I've tried every sort of marinade. I just cannot seem to get them tender."

The second cannibal asks, "What kind of Missionary do you use?"

The other replied, "You know, the ones that hang out at that place at the bend of the river. They have those brown cloaks with a rope around the waist and they're sort of bald on top with a funny ring of hair on their heads."

"Ah, ha!" the second cannibal replies. "No wonder ... those are friars!"
Click to expand...

:awe:

7/10.
 
alent1234 said:
what's the name of the picture?

you can clearly see gallows in the background and other torture/execution devices

as a guess i'd say this is from the netherlands during their long revolution in the 1500's or 1600's and the people being killed are done so for treason
Click to expand...

god i love owning know-it-alls on this forum.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Cannibalism_1571.PNG


Cannibalism in Russia and Lithuania 1571 source: Ein Erschröckenliche doch Warhaftige grausame hungers nott und Pestilenzische plag so im Landt Reissen vnnd Littaw furgangen im 1571 Jar (= A frightful but nevertheless truthful cruel emergency of hunger and pestilential trouble which happened in such a way in the country of the Russians and Lithuania in year 1571)
 
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