"Dildo Engineer" does an IAMA on reddit

[Phokus]

http://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/17jmgo/per_request_i_was_a_dildo_engineer_ama/

I can't stop laughing, hahahahaha 😀

 

[MomentsofSanity]

Paging Doctor Dildo...

 

[Kelvrick]

We did crush test on the vibrating rings to account for heavier people. Basically I built a machine to simulate two fat people fucking.

 

[Lanyap]

Speaking of dildos, I saw this cute little movie the other night on Showtime.

Hysteria
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tFy6cfPmjd4

 

[Exterous]

I ordered $1,000 in competitor vibrating rings on my bosses corporate credit card. American Express calls my boss, about the purchase, so he calls me in his office and puts it on speaker phone. The lady on the other hand starts off normally, asking about the purchase, until she comes to the word "cock rings". We hear her hesitate, and then stutter it out. My boss at the time, decides to ruin this person's day and says" Wait, $1,000 of what?" in which she had to repeat cock rings. He then makes her go through the list of each one to ensure that the "order was correct". As the lady from American Express reads each one off, you can hear her dying on the inside, as my boss snickers the whole time. After giving his information (mother maiden name, etc.), she then asks if he accepts the charges, in which he responds "Yes, I am having a party at my house today". The office could not stop laughing.

:awe: So much win.

 

[wirednuts]

speaking about the FDA controlling the materials that dildos are made of-

Actual dicks regulating fake ones

comic gold.

 

[dave_the_nerd]

speaking about the FDA controlling the materials that dildos are made of-





comic gold.

But probably something that should be regulated. I don't want some chinese-made piece of shit leaking lead or cyanide or some shit into my nethers.

 

[phucheneh]

:awe: So much win.

Proof that even if you somehow manage to end up working for someone who's not a total douchebag, you'll still be awash in a sea of dicks.

 

[wirednuts]

But probably something that should be regulated. I don't want some chinese-made piece of shit leaking lead or cyanide or some shit into my nethers.

i wasnt making fun of the fact that they do it.. its just the fact that its the fda. litterally, its actual dicks regulating fake dicks. its so funny... well ok not litterally but metaphorically its true.

 

[dave_the_nerd]

i wasnt making fun of the fact that they do it.. its just the fact that its the fda. litterally, its actual dicks regulating fake dicks. its so funny... well ok not litterally but metaphorically its true.

"Rule #1: Nothing bigger than mine..." :whiste:

 

[silverpig]

Well, he was a vibrator engineer, not a dildo engineer.

 

[wirednuts]

Well, he was a vibrator engineer, not a dildo engineer.

no i think he was a real engineer. he said he used resistors and solenoids to test the various models and compared the data.

a real dildo engineer would just pay hot girls a boatload of money so he can conduct the study... non smokers, never pregnant only thank you

 

[Jeff7]

Well, he was a vibrator engineer, not a dildo engineer.

I knew that Vibrations tech-elective course I picked would come in handy. :awe:

So would it be good or bad to have a vibrator that could auto-tune itself to the resonant frequency of any clitoris it encountered?
Or maybe multiple vibration sources, slightly out of phase with one another, for optimum effect. Are there any 3Φ vibrators on the market?
Porn helped the VCR gain traction. Maybe I could be responsible for helping get 3-phase power in every household.

 

[wirednuts]

I knew that Vibrations tech-elective course I picked would come in handy. :awe:

So would it be good or bad to have a vibrator that could auto-tune itself to the resonant frequency of any clitoris it encountered?
Or maybe multiple vibration sources, slightly out of phase with one another, for optimum effect. Are there any 3Φ vibrators on the market?
Porn helped the VCR gain traction. Maybe I could be responsible for helping get 3-phase power in every household.

my idea to get off the grid was to put a prius in the attic of every house

 

[Fenixgoon]

absolutely golden. i would quote one part, but i don't want AT to think i'm a monster of a person (i'm only slightly above that but i'd rather keep it that way 😉)

 

[silverpig]

I knew that Vibrations tech-elective course I picked would come in handy. :awe:

So would it be good or bad to have a vibrator that could auto-tune itself to the resonant frequency of any clitoris it encountered?
Or maybe multiple vibration sources, slightly out of phase with one another, for optimum effect. Are there any 3Φ vibrators on the market?
Porn helped the VCR gain traction. Maybe I could be responsible for helping get 3-phase power in every household.

If you read the AMA, he said that none of the engineering actually mattered to the women. It was all about aesthetics.

 

[phucheneh]

Well, he was a vibrator engineer, not a dildo engineer.

A dildo can be a vibrator, and a vibrator can be a dildo, but not all dildos are vibrators and not all vibrators are dildos.

That's catchy enough to be on a T-shirt.

 

[KlokWyze]

lol

 

[T_Yamamoto]

lol

Beat part imho

And the PHD guy xD

 

[SP33Demon]

4/10. And Reddit is annoying.