depression

Soybomb

Diamond Member
Jun 30, 2000
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I have a friend who frequently is "down" and tonight confessed it always gets worse in the winter and he has thought about suicide before. He spends all his money on his house and going to school so he can't afford professional help that way and he won't talk to his parents since he doesn't think they'll understand (redneck land down here, its believable). He's a 20 year old college student. What can I do to help this guy out? Any websites you people can give me to send him to? Is there any federal or state financial assistance for this sort of thing?
Thanks all
 

Isla

Elite member
Sep 12, 2000
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Actually, if he is in college there should be some free counseling/medical assistance available. It may not be the best, but it is a start.

If it is worse in winter, it could be chemical like SAD (Seasonal Affectative Disorder, I believe... not sure, I'm a bit rusty!).

In that case, a tanning bed may be all he needs! :D

Anyway, help him get busy finding help... it should be available at little or no cost.

Blessings~
 

ltk007

Banned
Feb 24, 2000
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If he can't seek professional help, as a friend the best thing you can do is be there for him. Spend time with him and try to do things to keep him happy. I've been depressed, and having good friends you can rely on is probably the best thing to snap you out of it.
 

stonythug

Banned
Nov 1, 2000
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Yep at my school they give you 5 free "sessions" a quarter with the shrink. I talked to someone who went to him too and they said he wasn't bad at all. I think a lot of schools offer something like this, if not they most definitely have some kindof support line or something to call. It may not be the best, but atleast they're trained to deal with stuff like this and won't say the wrong thing.
 

thelanx

Diamond Member
Jul 3, 2000
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Talk to him and ask him about times when he was really happy. Thinking of happy memories might cheer him up. What in those memories made him happy? Then spend some time with him so he won't be lonely and do the things that he remembers that made him happy. Also, you can do other things besides those just mentioned and have fun. Basically, try to make him happy. Create joy for him and let him see just how wonderful life can be. :)
 

Soybomb

Diamond Member
Jun 30, 2000
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Hmmm a couple problems though are we attend a community college so we have no free counseling service. Also I'll try to stuff for him when I can, but honestly I don't know him all that well I don't think. I think its odd he decided to confide in me, and I would like to help him, thanks all, any one else?
 

EmperorNero

Golden Member
Jun 2, 2000
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if he's suffering from...I forgot the word :(...but it's a chemical imbalance in the brain. the only effective way to fix that are medications.
 

toph99

Diamond Member
Aug 25, 2000
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like Isla said, it sounds like SAD. do a search on ask jeeve's, it may be able to find something for you. good luck

nero: you mean Manic Depression(bi-polar)?
 

IamDavid

Diamond Member
Sep 13, 2000
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If your friend suffers from clinical depression then there is nothing you can do for him besides get him professional help. People who don't know much about depression always think that if ya do or say the right thing it will fix the person but that's not the case at all. Most people who suffer must take anti-depressants if they wish to live a normal life. And depression does increase during the winter months and especially around the holidays.
 

sweetrobin

Golden Member
Jan 20, 2000
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Not all people who have depression have to take medicine ... I spent 5 years clinically depressed ... and as a preteen was extremelly suicidal ... but thanks to the love of my parents and many councilling sessions I recovered from the experience.. I had a relapse my freshman year of college when both my grandmothers and my dad were dieing ... but I think that was reasonable ... the best thing to do for your friend is to get them to a proffesional ... at the school it should be free ... I saw one when I had my relapse and she let me talk and get out all the things on my chest and she really helped me realize what I was feeling went more than just my family was falling apart ... I had this guilt complex like it was my fault that just because I left and things started getting bad that some how it was my fault ... she helped alot ... other than right after my dad died I haven't had a serious bout with depression since ..
 

vi edit

Elite Member
Super Moderator
Oct 28, 1999
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The main treatment methods for depression:

Biological - IE prozac, and other drugs, I have mixed feelings about them. I would recommend persuring other

Behavioral - Changing your routines, making time to get out and exercise, making time to get out and hang out with friends. As a person who has been through a depression, I can tell you that this is very effective. It took me meeting a very special girl to snap out of my depression and get me back into shape.

Cognative - Not incredible effective with most people, it's basically a therapist telling you that you are thinking illogically and tries to change the way you think about yourself, and ultimately tries to get you thinking away from depression. Usually works better for phobias.

Social - Group therapy, not as effective for depression as it is for trama, axiety, eating disorders, and other "society" influenced illnesses

Psychodynamic - Fruedian method. Basically sitting for hours on a couch talking with a therapist who is trying to drudge up some deep down repressed emotions and memories. Very expensive, seldomly effective.

The cheapest, and often times most effective means of helping someone with depression is simply snapping them out of their routine that they are in. If they are sleeping all of the time, then drag them out of bed and make them get out and do something. Exercise is very helpful in helping depression as well. Get out and run, or hit the gym.

Also, many family insurance plans provide a certain amount of hours allotted for "mental health". If you friend is under an insurance plan of his own, or is still under his families insurance, have them check into it. I should cost nothing if they have this service.
 

WoundedWallet

Platinum Member
Oct 9, 1999
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If there are any Universities around you they may have programs where practicing students will see people for little or no money. the students need the hours and the Department oversees them.

If he needs anti-depressants and he has no insurance or money to pay for them, some Universities have studies where he could be in a test group for some new drug. It's not the best of the worlds but it sure beats suicide.
 

Dameon

Banned
Oct 11, 1999
2,117
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Whatever you do, get your friend help. They are reaching out for help, and you may be the ONLY one they reach out to. I went through a very dark period in my life as well, and it is very difficult. Lots of very suicidial thoughts / writings... My mother found some writings from it years later and hyperventilated thinking it was my current state of mind.

Even if it means betraying your friends' trust, GET THEM HELP.
If they are truly suicidal at ANY point, they are in danger and screw what other people think.
Save your friend. Your friend can move at worst case, but you can't bring him back to life if you wait too long.