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[DrPizza]

Hmmm... let me see if this scenario is quite likely:

GF's sister: "omg, my hubby was in an accident. I'm supposed to be leaving on a cruise that I spent $1500 on, and the tickets are non-refundable. This is horrible, I've been saving for this getaway for years. Now I'm going to miss out "

GF: "You know, I'm not working this week. I was planning on moving my stuff to our new apartment this week; it's not a whole lot though. I'm sure my strong handsome boyfriend can handle it without being too much of a crybaby. I'd be happy to help you out, sis, so you don't miss out on your cruise. "

GF's sister: "You'd do that for me?! Thank you soooo much! All my hubby needs is some help putting on his medication. The kids are the ones that really need more care though - lunches, dinners, taking them to school. Are you sure it's not too much for you?"

GF: "Nah, I can handle it. Besides, it'll give me a chance to experience what it's like to have a family... I think my boyfriend might ask him to marry me soon."

Boyfriend: "me me me me me... why isn't everyone thinking about me me me me me?"

You're lucky that her family is close to each other... you'd be amazed at how many times as a married couple your family can come to the rescue. Then again, it seems that her family will be the ones coming to your rescue, despite your "I don't want any help from anyone and I'm not going to help anyone else out" attitude. Why do I think you have such an attitude? Because you said that YOU had to move all your stuff. Where's your family? Where are your friends? Maybe I'm pegging your personality wrong, but your OP indicates someone who isn't social or helpful at all.

 

[LivinLaVivaPollo]

Originally posted by: DrPizza
Hmmm... let me see if this scenario is quite likely:

GF's sister: "omg, my hubby was in an accident. I'm supposed to be leaving on a cruise that I spent $1500 on, and the tickets are non-refundable. This is horrible, I've been saving for this getaway for years. Now I'm going to miss out "

GF: "You know, I'm not working this week. I was planning on moving my stuff to our new apartment this week; it's not a whole lot though. I'm sure my strong handsome boyfriend can handle it without being too much of a crybaby. I'd be happy to help you out, sis, so you don't miss out on your cruise. "

GF's sister: "You'd do that for me?! Thank you soooo much! All my hubby needs is some help putting on his medication. The kids are the ones that really need more care though - lunches, dinners, taking them to school. Are you sure it's not too much for you?"

GF: "Nah, I can handle it. Besides, it'll give me a chance to experience what it's like to have a family... I think my boyfriend might ask him to marry me soon."

Boyfriend: "me me me me me... why isn't everyone thinking about me me me me me?"

You're lucky that her family is close to each other... you'd be amazed at how many times as a married couple your family can come to the rescue. Then again, it seems that her family will be the ones coming to your rescue, despite your "I don't want any help from anyone and I'm not going to help anyone else out" attitude. Why do I think you have such an attitude? Because you said that YOU had to move all your stuff. Where's your family? Where are your friends? Maybe I'm pegging your personality wrong, but your OP indicates someone who isn't social or helpful at all.

The cruise was free. She won it from a raffle from work.

I don't have a family anymore because my family is racist. I'm chinese, my GF is black. My family disowned me right after HS. I had to put myself through college so I could become an engineer and provide for myself and my GF.

 

[DrPizza]

I'm still amazed at your attitude - placing so much hatred toward your gf and her sis... Who do you think is going to come to the rescue when you have a 3 year old who starts vomiting at 5 in the morning, and the day care center refuses to allow sick kids to be dropped off? Don't you realize that perhaps someone in your wife's family who isn't working that day may reciprocate the favor and watch one of your kids? What are you going to do - "Hi boss, I know we're doing that presentation to our clients today on that multi-million dollar deal, but my kid is sick, so I won't be in today." You don't deserve a gf like the one you have. Big friggin deal if she forgets her library books or something... she sounds quite compassionate and thoughtful.

 

[DrPizza]

Originally posted by: DrPizza
Hmmm... let me see if this scenario is quite likely:

GF's sister: "omg, my hubby was in an accident. I'm supposed to be leaving on a cruise that I won, and now I can't. I was so excited that I finally won something, but now I'm going to miss out "

GF: "You know, I'm not working this week. I was planning on moving my stuff to our new apartment this week; it's not a whole lot though. I'm sure my strong handsome boyfriend can handle it without being too much of a crybaby. I'd be happy to help you out, sis, so you don't miss out on your cruise. "

GF's sister: "You'd do that for me?! Thank you soooo much! All my hubby needs is some help putting on his medication. The kids are the ones that really need more care though - lunches, dinners, taking them to school. Are you sure it's not too much for you?"

GF: "Nah, I can handle it. Besides, it'll give me a chance to experience what it's like to have a family... I think my boyfriend might ask him to marry me soon."

Boyfriend: "me me me me me... why isn't everyone thinking about me me me me me? My family disowned me and I don't have any friends who will help me move."

Fixed to accurately update the other piece of information you gave.

 

[notfred]

old apartment (Santa Cruz) to our new one (Manteca)

My condolences

I moved from Santa Cruz up here to Davis. I miss it.

 

[DrPizza]

awwww, where'd everyone taking the op's side go? I was just getting started!

 

[13Gigatons]

The job of the wife is to take of her husband when he is sick or injured. The fact that she went on a cruise for 3 weeks just shows how selfish and immature she is. Your GF is a complete push over and stupid.

Break up now and be glad that you did not marry her, she does not know her priority.

 

[LivinLaVivaPollo]

Originally posted by: DrPizza
awwww, where'd everyone taking the op's side go? I was just getting started!

There were people taking my side? I think it was a good 80% of all the posters calling me a selfish bastard.

 

[waggy]

Originally posted by: LivinLaVivaPollo

Originally posted by: DrPizza
awwww, where'd everyone taking the op's side go? I was just getting started!

There were people taking my side? I think it was a good 80% of all the posters calling me a selfish bastard.

to be honest it hink you are a immature prick. but i do agree what your GF is doing is wrong. as i said above you both need counseling and think long and hard if you want to get married. by the sounds of it neither one of you are ready. to many kids today get married when they are not really ready and end up getting a divorce.


her BIL (brohter-in-law) should not be her #1 priorty. i really do not give 2 shits about her makeing you do all the moving (though that is very rude and selfish) but the fact she is a teacher and has not done anything for her students and will be with her BIL. she could have went over for a short time and did other more important things.

 

[13Gigatons]

Originally posted by: LivinLaVivaPollo

Originally posted by: DrPizza
awwww, where'd everyone taking the op's side go? I was just getting started!

There were people taking my side? I think it was a good 80% of all the posters calling me a selfish bastard.

Your not selfish. A wife or GF is suppose to take care of her own first and then to help out extended family if she has time left over. The fact that the WIFE took a 3 week cruise after her husband was injured shows she is to shallow or she went to bonk on the ship.

The Husband is no prize either. He should have put his foot down and made his wife stay home and fulfill her duties as wife and mother.

 

[mattpegher]

Another person who doesn't think the OP is being selfish here.

It sound to me like the OP already has noticed that he is not a high priority in the GF mind, and this is just the event to make it obvious. I bet there have been other events that have shaken his faith in the relationship before. Hell the man gave up his family to be with her.

If you feel this way you are probably right and it is only going to get worse.

If others were already caring for the husband then why is she ignoring her own responsibilities.

I can talk from personal experience, if you feel like your a low priority then you are a low priority and you don't need that.

 

[Pacfanweb]

Originally posted by: LivinLaVivaPollo

The cruise was free. She won it from a raffle from work.

I don't have a family anymore because my family is racist. I'm chinese, my GF is black. My family disowned me right after HS. I had to put myself through college so I could become an engineer and provide for myself and my GF.

The picture becomes clearer.

I can see her helping out because the sister can't miss work, but not a cruise. Especially a free one.

 

[gotsmack]

Originally posted by: LivinLaVivaPollo

Originally posted by: DrPizza
Hmmm... let me see if this scenario is quite likely:

GF's sister: "omg, my hubby was in an accident. I'm supposed to be leaving on a cruise that I spent $1500 on, and the tickets are non-refundable. This is horrible, I've been saving for this getaway for years. Now I'm going to miss out "

GF: "You know, I'm not working this week. I was planning on moving my stuff to our new apartment this week; it's not a whole lot though. I'm sure my strong handsome boyfriend can handle it without being too much of a crybaby. I'd be happy to help you out, sis, so you don't miss out on your cruise. "

GF's sister: "You'd do that for me?! Thank you soooo much! All my hubby needs is some help putting on his medication. The kids are the ones that really need more care though - lunches, dinners, taking them to school. Are you sure it's not too much for you?"

GF: "Nah, I can handle it. Besides, it'll give me a chance to experience what it's like to have a family... I think my boyfriend might ask him to marry me soon."

Boyfriend: "me me me me me... why isn't everyone thinking about me me me me me?"

You're lucky that her family is close to each other... you'd be amazed at how many times as a married couple your family can come to the rescue. Then again, it seems that her family will be the ones coming to your rescue, despite your "I don't want any help from anyone and I'm not going to help anyone else out" attitude. Why do I think you have such an attitude? Because you said that YOU had to move all your stuff. Where's your family? Where are your friends? Maybe I'm pegging your personality wrong, but your OP indicates someone who isn't social or helpful at all.

The cruise was free. She won it from a raffle from work.

I don't have a family anymore because my family is racist. I'm chinese, my GF is black. My family disowned me right after HS. I had to put myself through college so I could become an engineer and provide for myself and my GF.

Break up with her and go back to your family. You'll find someone better.

She is not giving you the respect you deserve as her partner. You are just her meal ticket.

also these little problems you are having now will just get worse after you get married.