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Dec 27, 2001
11,272
1
0
Originally posted by: JS80
i would be suspect of her if she DIDN'T HELP HER OWN FAMILY BECAUSE HER SISTER IS AN IRRESPONSIBLE DOUCHE. at least she's not like her sister, who goes on a cruise by herself with an injured husband at home and has her sister take care of her family.

which means when you're sick and dying she will be tending to your needs. you're a selfish jerk. you don't deserve her.

Nope, it just means she's a pushover for her family which is worse.
 

sixone

Lifer
May 3, 2004
25,030
5
61
Originally posted by: LivinLaVivaPollo
Word. I was going to save up for the next few years so we could buy a house together. But screw that, I'm going to buy an Escalade. It's all about me now.

Now? When wasn't it? :confused:
 

NaOH

Diamond Member
Mar 2, 2006
5,015
0
0
I think you have other things to worry about....

Brother in Law 8===> GF
 

mattpegher

Platinum Member
Jun 18, 2006
2,203
0
71
What do you know about any history between the husband and your GF?

I guess the hubby was going to take care of the kids while the wife went on this cruise. Did she go with anyone else?

If you can be sure that there is nothing going on between the husband and your GF then let it slide she may just be one of those "responsible" people. But don't let a pattern of treating you as low priority go unnoticed.

Also sounds like you are repressing your desires and needs for this relationship, don't do this it is a trap that will ruin your relationship over time compromise has to be even or else you will feel cheated and hate her for it in a few years.
Buy the Escalade!!
 

desertdweller

Senior member
Jan 6, 2001
588
0
0


Its probably better for her that you leave now. That way she wont have to worry about you leaving her when life throws up a real problem.


 

eakers

Lifer
Aug 14, 2000
12,169
2
0
Anyway, she has been off for the past three weeks, so she was supposed to move stuff from our old apartment (Santa Cruz) to our new one (Manteca). The first two weeks, she didn't do crap. The last week, her brother in law got injured in a motorcycle accident - a lot of scrapes, can't move around. Her sister had a cruise planned for herself, but she wasn't going to give that up, even though her husband got injured. So she went on the cruise anyway, leaving her injured husband and kids at home.

wtf? her sister is a horrible woman.

at least you can see that your gf is a really good, caring person.
 

Baked

Lifer
Dec 28, 2004
36,052
17
81
You know your GF is banging the husband dude right? Pleaes tell me you figured that part before you made the post.
 

mwmorph

Diamond Member
Dec 27, 2004
8,877
1
81
Wait, stop this right now.

Everyone in the story here is being very immature.

OP. Your gf does something she thinks is right and which is forced on her by her sister so you twist this whole thing into a pity story for you? Your fiancee/gf did a noble thing and now you are going to "call her and yell at her some more," with the attitude "I was going to save up for the next few years so we could buy a house together. But screw that, I'm going to buy an Escalade. It's all about me now."

Your gf may have some problems but that is no reason to be immature and selfish and angry. Relationships are not built on a foundation of resentment, anger and selfishness. Your gf had to do it. Her sister is a douche and the family probably could care less about this sister who got knocked up early. Furthermore your gf being a procrastinator and then being hurt by an unforeseen event that screws with her moving schedule does not give you an excuse to be angry. She is need of help more than ever. Her sister ditching the brother in law, her hectic moving and teaching schedules and your immature and poorly thought through actions and words are not what she needs right now. In a relationship you 2 should support each other and thus you should be supporting and helping, not compounding the problem. In the op, it seems like you are being somewhat selfish of the situation. Your gf is doing what she thinks is right.


Your gf's sister on the other had could use some therapy as well as marriage counseling. Now with 2 kids, she has waived her "have fun attitude" and should be taking care of the kids so they don?t screw up like her and have kids at 12-18. Screwed up people bring up screwed up children. The negligence and what sounds like teen pregnancy is not a healthy behavior and points toward chaos in her earlier years and this should be checked out by a professional. People from chaotic backgrounds tend to breed chaos in their own families and that is very unhealthy for young children. Negligence and a rocky relationship with the father figure is a good example of chaos which will affect how the children look at relationships later in life.

How old are you 2, are you sure a marriage is the best thing for you 2 right now? It seems that even with a moderate problem like this the relationship falls apart.
 

warbean

Member
Jun 28, 2006
141
0
0
WHy does everyone think the GF is such a great caring person? She assumes responsibilities that aren't hers while neglecting her own responsibilities to her relationship, career, landlord, kids at her school, etc.

Is religion involved in this in any way? Is GF religious? That might explain a few things if GF+husband theory is not valid.
 

wheresmybacon

Diamond Member
Sep 10, 2004
3,899
1
76
Originally posted by: Baked
You know your GF is banging the husband dude right? Pleaes tell me you figured that part before you made the post.
OP what's your take on this?

 

nutxo

Diamond Member
May 20, 2001
6,824
503
126
Originally posted by: Baked
You know your GF is banging the husband dude right? Pleaes tell me you figured that part before you made the post.


I rarely agree with anything baked has to say but I was thinking this before I saw his post.
 

LivinLaVivaPollo

Senior member
Dec 29, 2000
954
0
0
Originally posted by: hungfarover
Originally posted by: Baked
You know your GF is banging the husband dude right? Pleaes tell me you figured that part before you made the post.
OP what's your take on this?

Nah, that's not happening. He's in his forties, GF's sister is in her thirties, and my GF is in her twenties.

 

warbean

Member
Jun 28, 2006
141
0
0
Not sure about your logic here...you're saying men in their forties never sleep with women in their twenties?


Originally posted by: LivinLaVivaPollo
Originally posted by: hungfarover
Originally posted by: Baked
You know your GF is banging the husband dude right? Pleaes tell me you figured that part before you made the post.
OP what's your take on this?

Nah, that's not happening. He's in his forties, GF's sister is in her thirties, and my GF is in her twenties.

 

Injury

Lifer
Jul 19, 2004
13,066
2
81
Originally posted by: LivinLaVivaPollo
Originally posted by: hungfarover
Originally posted by: Baked
You know your GF is banging the husband dude right? Pleaes tell me you figured that part before you made the post.
OP what's your take on this?

Nah, that's not happening. He's in his forties, GF's sister is in her thirties, and my GF is in her twenties.

Okay.... and?
 

waggy

No Lifer
Dec 14, 2000
68,143
10
81
Originally posted by: warbean
WHy does everyone think the GF is such a great caring person? She assumes responsibilities that aren't hers while neglecting her own responsibilities to her relationship, career, landlord, kids at her school, etc.

Is religion involved in this in any way? Is GF religious? That might explain a few things if GF+husband theory is not valid.

no fuvcking ******. i tried to say that but err I'm a retard tonight hehe damn pain pills .


she can no prioritize her resbonsalites. #1 is NOT her brother-in-law. hell he ain't even in the top 5. also saying that the OP is not #! either but damn close.

she is going ot make a great teacher. not doing any planning for her students. great fvckign teacher. glad she is not in my school zone. not to mention what kind of person leaves another to do all the work in a move? fvck thats rude and irresponsible.

but yeah some of the remarks the OP made are childish. honestly neither one of them are ready for marriage.
 

Aquaman

Lifer
Dec 17, 1999
25,054
13
0
Originally posted by: LivinLaVivaPollo
Originally posted by: hungfarover
Originally posted by: Baked
You know your GF is banging the husband dude right? Pleaes tell me you figured that part before you made the post.
OP what's your take on this?

Nah, that's not happening. He's in his forties, GF's sister is in her thirties, and my GF is in her twenties.

Denile.......... not just a river ;)

Cheers,
Aquaman
 

LivinLaVivaPollo

Senior member
Dec 29, 2000
954
0
0
Originally posted by: mwmorph
Wait, stop this right now.

Everyone in the story here is being very immature.

OP. Your gf does something she thinks is right and which is forced on her by her sister so you twist this whole thing into a pity story for you? Your fiancee/gf did a noble thing and now you are going to "call her and yell at her some more," with the attitude "I was going to save up for the next few years so we could buy a house together. But screw that, I'm going to buy an Escalade. It's all about me now."

Your gf may have some problems but that is no reason to be immature and selfish and angry. Relationships are not built on a foundation of resentment, anger and selfishness. Your gf had to do it. Her sister is a douche and the family probably could care less about this sister who got knocked up early. Furthermore your gf being a procrastinator and then being hurt by an unforeseen event that screws with her moving schedule does not give you an excuse to be angry. She is need of help more than ever. Her sister ditching the brother in law, her hectic moving and teaching schedules and your immature and poorly thought through actions and words are not what she needs right now. In a relationship you 2 should support each other and thus you should be supporting and helping, not compounding the problem. In the op, it seems like you are being somewhat selfish of the situation. Your gf is doing what she thinks is right.


Your gf's sister on the other had could use some therapy as well as marriage counseling. Now with 2 kids, she has waived her "have fun attitude" and should be taking care of the kids so they don?t screw up like her and have kids at 12-18. Screwed up people bring up screwed up children. The negligence and what sounds like teen pregnancy is not a healthy behavior and points toward chaos in her earlier years and this should be checked out by a professional. People from chaotic backgrounds tend to breed chaos in their own families and that is very unhealthy for young children. Negligence and a rocky relationship with the father figure is a good example of chaos which will affect how the children look at relationships later in life.

How old are you 2, are you sure a marriage is the best thing for you 2 right now? It seems that even with a moderate problem like this the relationship falls apart.

You're 100% correct. I've thought this out and we are not meant to be with one another. That's something I'm sure of. It was my mistake though for thinking it could work out. I'm not going to marry her. The engagement is so far out of my mind now anyway.

However, this argument wasn't necessarily directed towards her more so than her sister. Don't get me wrong, I'm angry at her sister more than I'm angry at her. But, this is a good time for my GF to take a stand and at least make a compromise. The brother in law HAS many many relatives that were tending to him initially, but they all stopped seeing that my GF was doing such a good job. She didn't have to be in the position she was in, it was her choice, and she has to accept the reprecussions.

My comments about the escalade was just an attempt to be facetious.
 

LivinLaVivaPollo

Senior member
Dec 29, 2000
954
0
0
Originally posted by: warbean
Not sure about your logic here...you're saying men in their forties never sleep with women in their twenties?


Originally posted by: LivinLaVivaPollo
Originally posted by: hungfarover
Originally posted by: Baked
You know your GF is banging the husband dude right? Pleaes tell me you figured that part before you made the post.
OP what's your take on this?

Nah, that's not happening. He's in his forties, GF's sister is in her thirties, and my GF is in her twenties.

Well no, I'm so positive that it's not happening that I struggled to come up with a reason as to why it's not happening.
 

kt

Diamond Member
Apr 1, 2000
6,032
1,348
136
Something is going on with your GF.. I just can't put my finger on it. You two seriously need to sit down and have a long calm talk.
 

mwmorph

Diamond Member
Dec 27, 2004
8,877
1
81
Originally posted by: LivinLaVivaPollo
Originally posted by: mwmorph
Wait, stop this right now.

Everyone in the story here is being very immature.

OP. Your gf does something she thinks is right and which is forced on her by her sister so you twist this whole thing into a pity story for you? Your fiancee/gf did a noble thing and now you are going to "call her and yell at her some more," with the attitude "I was going to save up for the next few years so we could buy a house together. But screw that, I'm going to buy an Escalade. It's all about me now."

Your gf may have some problems but that is no reason to be immature and selfish and angry. Relationships are not built on a foundation of resentment, anger and selfishness. Your gf had to do it. Her sister is a douche and the family probably could care less about this sister who got knocked up early. Furthermore your gf being a procrastinator and then being hurt by an unforeseen event that screws with her moving schedule does not give you an excuse to be angry. She is need of help more than ever. Her sister ditching the brother in law, her hectic moving and teaching schedules and your immature and poorly thought through actions and words are not what she needs right now. In a relationship you 2 should support each other and thus you should be supporting and helping, not compounding the problem. In the op, it seems like you are being somewhat selfish of the situation. Your gf is doing what she thinks is right.


Your gf's sister on the other had could use some therapy as well as marriage counseling. Now with 2 kids, she has waived her "have fun attitude" and should be taking care of the kids so they don?t screw up like her and have kids at 12-18. Screwed up people bring up screwed up children. The negligence and what sounds like teen pregnancy is not a healthy behavior and points toward chaos in her earlier years and this should be checked out by a professional. People from chaotic backgrounds tend to breed chaos in their own families and that is very unhealthy for young children. Negligence and a rocky relationship with the father figure is a good example of chaos which will affect how the children look at relationships later in life.

How old are you 2, are you sure a marriage is the best thing for you 2 right now? It seems that even with a moderate problem like this the relationship falls apart.

You're 100% correct. I've thought this out and we are not meant to be with one another. That's something I'm sure of. It was my mistake though for thinking it could work out. I'm not going to marry her. The engagement is so far out of my mind now anyway.

However, this argument wasn't necessarily directed towards her more so than her sister. Don't get me wrong, I'm angry at her sister more than I'm angry at her. But, this is a good time for my GF to take a stand and at least make a compromise. The brother in law HAS many many relatives that were tending to him initially, but they all stopped seeing that my GF was doing such a good job. She didn't have to be in the position she was in, it was her choice, and she has to accept the reprecussions.

My comments about the escalade was just an attempt to be facetious.

I see now. I though the other family members shunned this sister and refused to take care of the husband. Still her family is pretty messed up as it is. Relegating all responsibility toward her while the wife takes oof to be away from the mess is not a healthy way to handle matters.

Either your gf felt guilted and duty bound by the family r sister or the family has a very messed up sense of responsibilities and boundaries. Nto a good situation to marry into.
 

waggy

No Lifer
Dec 14, 2000
68,143
10
81
Originally posted by: mwmorph
Originally posted by: LivinLaVivaPollo
Originally posted by: mwmorph
Wait, stop this right now.

Everyone in the story here is being very immature.

OP. Your gf does something she thinks is right and which is forced on her by her sister so you twist this whole thing into a pity story for you? Your fiancee/gf did a noble thing and now you are going to "call her and yell at her some more," with the attitude "I was going to save up for the next few years so we could buy a house together. But screw that, I'm going to buy an Escalade. It's all about me now."

Your gf may have some problems but that is no reason to be immature and selfish and angry. Relationships are not built on a foundation of resentment, anger and selfishness. Your gf had to do it. Her sister is a douche and the family probably could care less about this sister who got knocked up early. Furthermore your gf being a procrastinator and then being hurt by an unforeseen event that screws with her moving schedule does not give you an excuse to be angry. She is need of help more than ever. Her sister ditching the brother in law, her hectic moving and teaching schedules and your immature and poorly thought through actions and words are not what she needs right now. In a relationship you 2 should support each other and thus you should be supporting and helping, not compounding the problem. In the op, it seems like you are being somewhat selfish of the situation. Your gf is doing what she thinks is right.


Your gf's sister on the other had could use some therapy as well as marriage counseling. Now with 2 kids, she has waived her "have fun attitude" and should be taking care of the kids so they don?t screw up like her and have kids at 12-18. Screwed up people bring up screwed up children. The negligence and what sounds like teen pregnancy is not a healthy behavior and points toward chaos in her earlier years and this should be checked out by a professional. People from chaotic backgrounds tend to breed chaos in their own families and that is very unhealthy for young children. Negligence and a rocky relationship with the father figure is a good example of chaos which will affect how the children look at relationships later in life.

How old are you 2, are you sure a marriage is the best thing for you 2 right now? It seems that even with a moderate problem like this the relationship falls apart.

You're 100% correct. I've thought this out and we are not meant to be with one another. That's something I'm sure of. It was my mistake though for thinking it could work out. I'm not going to marry her. The engagement is so far out of my mind now anyway.

However, this argument wasn't necessarily directed towards her more so than her sister. Don't get me wrong, I'm angry at her sister more than I'm angry at her. But, this is a good time for my GF to take a stand and at least make a compromise. The brother in law HAS many many relatives that were tending to him initially, but they all stopped seeing that my GF was doing such a good job. She didn't have to be in the position she was in, it was her choice, and she has to accept the reprecussions.

My comments about the escalade was just an attempt to be facetious.

I see now. I though the other family members shunned this sister and refused to take care of the husband. Still her family is pretty messed up as it is. Relegating all responsibility toward her while the wife takes oof to be away from the mess is not a healthy way to handle matters.

Either your gf felt guilted and duty bound by the family r sister or the family has a very messed up sense of responsibilities and boundaries. Nto a good situation to marry into.

nope. i would worry whats next? money? how much? if she feels she has to do anything for the family it is going to cause nothing but grief for you.

sounds like the GF needs to figure out what really matters. a brother in law or someone she may merry?