"Coming out" as atheist to parents..

[MJinZ]

Having sex with Jesus?

Santa is ok since there is a story of a real life guy who was vaguely similar. What is easter all about? What does a rabbit have to do with Jesus dying??

Vaguely similar to Coca Cola's creation of the red hatted fat white dude? I don't think so.

 

[JackBurton]

When I told my Dad I was an atheist, he asked me how much it would cost for me to leave the family right then. He didn't want me to spread like a cancer. We reconciled years later. Many times I have told people of my lack of faith and the response is usually "You will change" or "You are kidding."

Your dad was right to get you to leave the family. Logic is the tool of the Devil, and it is a very powerful tool at that. Before you know it, everyone would be thinking rationally in your family if you stuck around. And THAT would be crazy!

I know what you are going to asking, how can I fight the Devil and his logic power? Well, you first start off by going to church and singing the same song to your God EVERY Sunday. God loves to hear the same song over and over and over again. He just can't get enough of those songs. We as humans get tired of a song on the radio after about a month. But not this God. He can listen to the same song for thousands of years and never get tired of it. That is why he is God. Secondly, pay attention in church. You'll find out all kinds of cool new things in this world from going to church. You'll find out there are talking snakes, donkeys, and even unicorns. Pretty magical stuff. Have you ever tried talking to a donkey? Well, give it a shot the next time you are around one. They give great advice. You also learn that Jesus can fly like Superman. However he only developed that power when he died and could only do it when no one was looking, but he can fly nonetheless. And finally, pretend to drink your God's blood every Sunday? This is the most important thing you can do. It will give you magic powers that will help you fight the Devil. Now it won't stop you from getting cancer or any serious illness. Hell it won't even keep you from getting hurt. But it is magical, and that is all you need to know.

With this knowledge, you now have the power to fight the Devil and his evil powers. Go now, and may logic never find you.

 

[lxskllr]

Your dad was right to get you to leave the family. Logic is the tool of the Devil, and it is a very powerful tool at that. Before you know it, everyone would be thinking rationally in your family if you stuck around. And THAT would be crazy!

I know what you are going to asking, how can I fight the Devil and his logic power? Well, you first start off by going to church and singing the same song to your God EVERY Sunday. God loves to hear the same song over and over and over again. He just can't get enough of those songs. We as humans get tired of a song on the radio after about a month. But not this God. He can listen to the same song for thousands of years and never get tired of it. That is why he is God. Secondly, pay attention in church. You'll find out all kinds of cool new things in this world from going to church. You'll find out there are talking snakes, donkeys, and even unicorns. Pretty magical stuff. Have you ever tried talking to a donkey? Well, give it a shot the next time you are around one. They give great advise. You also learn that Jesus can fly like Superman. However he only developed that power when he died and could only do it when no one was looking, but he can fly nonetheless. And finally, pretend to drink your God's blood even Sunday? This is the most important thing you can do. It will give you magic powers that will help you fight the Devil. Now it won't stop you from getting cancer or any serious illness. Hell it won't even keep you from getting hurt. But it is magical, and that is all you need to know.

With this knowledge, you now have the power to fight the Devil and his evil powers. Go now, and may logic never find you.

Awesome :^D

 

[caddlad]

other than bacon, I'd have no problem giving up pork... pork chops, loins, roasts, ribs, etc do nothing for me.

Speaking of heresy...

 

[adairusmc]

 

[nageov3t]

Speaking of heresy...

idgi 😕

 

[adairusmc]

Your dad was right to get you to leave the family. Logic is the tool of the Devil, and it is a very powerful tool at that. Before you know it, everyone would be thinking rationally in your family if you stuck around. And THAT would be crazy!

I know what you are going to asking, how can I fight the Devil and his logic power? Well, you first start off by going to church and singing the same song to your God EVERY Sunday. God loves to hear the same song over and over and over again. He just can't get enough of those songs. We as humans get tired of a song on the radio after about a month. But not this God. He can listen to the same song for thousands of years and never get tired of it. That is why he is God. Secondly, pay attention in church. You'll find out all kinds of cool new things in this world from going to church. You'll find out there are talking snakes, donkeys, and even unicorns. Pretty magical stuff. Have you ever tried talking to a donkey? Well, give it a shot the next time you are around one. They give great advice. You also learn that Jesus can fly like Superman. However he only developed that power when he died and could only do it when no one was looking, but he can fly nonetheless. And finally, pretend to drink your God's blood every Sunday? This is the most important thing you can do. It will give you magic powers that will help you fight the Devil. Now it won't stop you from getting cancer or any serious illness. Hell it won't even keep you from getting hurt. But it is magical, and that is all you need to know.

With this knowledge, you now have the power to fight the Devil and his evil powers. Go now, and may logic never find you.

 

[Kadarin]

Yep, that's about it right there.

 

[mmntech]

Vaguely similar to Coca Cola's creation of the red hatted fat white dude? I don't think so.

Coca Cola didn't invent that Santa. His origins actually come from Odin, the Norse god. There's your useless trivia for the day. :hmm:

I come from an irreligious family. Only my mom's sister and her family are regular church-goers. We still celebrate Christmas though, just without the Jesus.

 

[Chaotic42]

idgi 😕

He has blasphemed that which defines breakfast and infact all delicious meals: bacon.

 

[Wag]

If he had told his mom he was converting to Judaism she probably would have had a heart attack.😉

 

[DanDaManJC]

Without getting into a religion discussion here, it should be pointed out that videolulz are not a good basis for accepting or rejecting a particular belief.

You know that's a pretty hypocritical statement.

Why shouldn't a negative testimony for Christ be any more or less compelling or applicable than a positive one?

The whole reason I bring this up is because Christians are regularly taught that the best way to spread the word is to basically share their positive testimonies... often times complete with personal info and whatnot. Negative or positive -- both times you have 1on1 personal experience and revelation. I realize that to be saved it always ends up being about a direct relationship with Jesus // go through the catholic church (or w.e your denomination suggests is the route to heaven). But the testimony is probably the best way to sell your faith and is regularly exploited.

So again, what disqualifies a negative testimony? Is the Christian just supposed to nod their head in agreement // ignore the truth when they see these hypocrisies?