Christmas Rant

manlymatt83

Lifer
Oct 14, 2005
10,051
44
91
I just need to rant.

I have a really hard time spending time with my family. I love them dearly, but Christmas is always hard. Especially this Christmas.

First, I don't like "things". I really hate junk. And all while I was growing up, my parents felt they always needed to buy me something new - and they would buy me junk. Clothes, clothes, clothes, and more clothes. Now, this isn't lack of appreciation. This is the fact that I only have a really small room where I live and I don't even have enough room for the clothes that I do have, and I usually go through them monthly and donate a few pieces I don't wear often to good will. I'm just that kind of person that likes owning only 10 shirts or so and sticking to those 10 shirts.

This Christmas, my mother asked me what I would like, and I politely responded "Nothing, thanks though! Just to spend time with you guys." I emphasized that I did NOT want anything at all - I don't have room for anything. But I EMPHASIZED TO HER verbally that I did not want clothes. Especially not clothes. Anything but clothes.

Today, we open presents, and all I have is boxes and boxes of clothes. I politely thanked my mother but let her know I would appreciate it if she either took the clothes back, or I would gladly donate them to goodwill. She got mad at me and explained that I didn't appreciate things.

I do. I really do. I love my parents a lot. I just hate looking forward to Christmas because I know that I'm going to get more and more boxes of clothes and it's just going to be a hassle to do anything with them.

/rant

Merry Christmas all. Other than that, its a joyous holiday. I had a really rough year. A very very rough year. Some of you know what happened, but unlike the past, I kept it to myself as best I could. Thanks to all that supported me in May with your thoughts and comments. THAT I am truly thankful for.

On to 2009!
 

xSauronx

Lifer
Jul 14, 2000
19,582
4
81
you shouldnt have mentioned anything for a couple of days. sometimes *timing* is part of being polite, as well.

otherwise *shrug* i dont care about junk...but if the clothes are decent it wouldnt bother me.
 

rudeguy

Lifer
Dec 27, 2001
47,351
14
61
I hate receiving gifts and my family knows it. I know they like to give gifts, so I don't make a stink about it.

Call your mom and tell her that you love her and will keep the clothes just because she bought them for you. She isn't going to be around forever, don't hurt her over something so petty.

 

xanis

Lifer
Sep 11, 2005
17,571
8
0
Originally posted by: xSauronx
you shouldnt have mentioned anything for a couple of days. sometimes *timing* is part of being polite, as well.

otherwise *shrug* i dont care about junk...but if the clothes are decent it wouldnt bother me.

This. You probably should have waited until next week or something. Christmas, right after you receive the gift, isn't the right time to tell someone you don't want it.
 

MagnusTheBrewer

IN MEMORIAM
Jun 19, 2004
24,122
1,594
126
Gifts are as much about the giver as the receiver. Since you didn't give your family any ideas (no gifts is not an idea), your mother gave you clothes because she's tired of seeing you in the same 10 outfits. Smarten up, wear something new when you see family and tell them what's important in your life right now.
 

her209

No Lifer
Oct 11, 2000
56,336
11
0
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: her209
Take a hint OP: Your mom wants you to start make zee babies.
Don't even start.
Trust me. When you have little ones running around, she'll be getting them clothes instead of you.
 

manlymatt83

Lifer
Oct 14, 2005
10,051
44
91
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
Gifts are as much about the giver as the receiver. Since you didn't give your family any ideas (no gifts is not an idea), your mother gave you clothes because she's tired of seeing you in the same 10 outfits. Smarten up, wear something new when you see family and tell them what's important in your life right now.

That's the thing - I DON'T WANT gifts. I'm going to stop coming for christmas if they continue to get me gifts. Its nothing but anxiety when I see something with my name on it. I don't want junk.
 

rudeguy

Lifer
Dec 27, 2001
47,351
14
61
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
Gifts are as much about the giver as the receiver. Since you didn't give your family any ideas (no gifts is not an idea), your mother gave you clothes because she's tired of seeing you in the same 10 outfits. Smarten up, wear something new when you see family and tell them what's important in your life right now.

That's the thing - I DON'T WANT gifts. I'm going to stop coming for christmas if they continue to get me gifts. Its nothing but anxiety when I see something with my name on it. I don't want junk.

The would isn't only about you. I'm not trying to be mean, just honest.
 

jagec

Lifer
Apr 30, 2004
24,442
6
81
No one will believe you if you say "nothing".

So say something. Surely there is SOMETHING you'd prefer to clothes? Electronics? Games? Dinners at a fancy restaurant? Food is always good because it is consumable, and you can give it away guilt-free after a requisite amount of time.

Whatever you do, don't tell people to their face on the day you get the gift that you don't want it.

And why did you open all of your gifts BEFORE Christmas? Are you a terrorist? Do you hate America? Why don't you just go ahead and bomb something next time instead, huh Osama?:|
 

manlymatt83

Lifer
Oct 14, 2005
10,051
44
91
Originally posted by: rudeguy
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
Gifts are as much about the giver as the receiver. Since you didn't give your family any ideas (no gifts is not an idea), your mother gave you clothes because she's tired of seeing you in the same 10 outfits. Smarten up, wear something new when you see family and tell them what's important in your life right now.

That's the thing - I DON'T WANT gifts. I'm going to stop coming for christmas if they continue to get me gifts. Its nothing but anxiety when I see something with my name on it. I don't want junk.

The would isn't only about you. I'm not trying to be mean, just honest.

Right. And by not asking for gifts, therefore saving my parents money, and saving me stress, I'm being stubborn and selfish :| :roll:
 

rudeguy

Lifer
Dec 27, 2001
47,351
14
61
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: rudeguy
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
Gifts are as much about the giver as the receiver. Since you didn't give your family any ideas (no gifts is not an idea), your mother gave you clothes because she's tired of seeing you in the same 10 outfits. Smarten up, wear something new when you see family and tell them what's important in your life right now.

That's the thing - I DON'T WANT gifts. I'm going to stop coming for christmas if they continue to get me gifts. Its nothing but anxiety when I see something with my name on it. I don't want junk.

The would isn't only about you. I'm not trying to be mean, just honest.

Right. And by not asking for gifts, therefore saving my parents money, and saving me stress, I'm being stubborn and selfish :| :roll:

Yes. You are robbing them of the joy of giving presents.
 

MagnusTheBrewer

IN MEMORIAM
Jun 19, 2004
24,122
1,594
126
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
Gifts are as much about the giver as the receiver. Since you didn't give your family any ideas (no gifts is not an idea), your mother gave you clothes because she's tired of seeing you in the same 10 outfits. Smarten up, wear something new when you see family and tell them what's important in your life right now.

That's the thing - I DON'T WANT gifts. I'm going to stop coming for christmas if they continue to get me gifts. Its nothing but anxiety when I see something with my name on it. I don't want junk.

Gifts don't have to be junk. Donations to schooling, charities, interest groups and hobbies could all be great gifts. Are you telling me there's nothing in your life that you wouldn't like to do more of, be better at or, have more impact in? It sounds more like a problem you have with sharing your life with your family than not wanting gifts.
 

manlymatt83

Lifer
Oct 14, 2005
10,051
44
91
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
Gifts are as much about the giver as the receiver. Since you didn't give your family any ideas (no gifts is not an idea), your mother gave you clothes because she's tired of seeing you in the same 10 outfits. Smarten up, wear something new when you see family and tell them what's important in your life right now.

That's the thing - I DON'T WANT gifts. I'm going to stop coming for christmas if they continue to get me gifts. Its nothing but anxiety when I see something with my name on it. I don't want junk.

Gifts don't have to be junk. Donations to schooling, charities, interest groups and hobbies could all be great gifts. Are you telling me there's nothing in your life that you wouldn't like to do more of, be better at or, have more impact in? It sounds more like a problem you have with sharing your life with your family than not wanting gifts.

I don't like physical things. I could fit everything I own in my car if I had to minus my bed. I could list everything I own in this thread from memory. I just hate stuff. I hate stuff sitting around that I don't use. If I don't use something for at least a month, I get rid of it. There's too much junk in this world.

As far as donations, I donate a lot. I always donate my left over clothes, and I make financial donations all the time to various organizations.
 

MagnusTheBrewer

IN MEMORIAM
Jun 19, 2004
24,122
1,594
126
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
Gifts are as much about the giver as the receiver. Since you didn't give your family any ideas (no gifts is not an idea), your mother gave you clothes because she's tired of seeing you in the same 10 outfits. Smarten up, wear something new when you see family and tell them what's important in your life right now.

That's the thing - I DON'T WANT gifts. I'm going to stop coming for christmas if they continue to get me gifts. Its nothing but anxiety when I see something with my name on it. I don't want junk.

Gifts don't have to be junk. Donations to schooling, charities, interest groups and hobbies could all be great gifts. Are you telling me there's nothing in your life that you wouldn't like to do more of, be better at or, have more impact in? It sounds more like a problem you have with sharing your life with your family than not wanting gifts.

I don't like physical things. I could fit everything I own in my car if I had to minus my bed. I could list everything I own in this thread from memory. I just hate stuff. I hate stuff sitting around that I don't use. If I don't use something for at least a month, I get rid of it. There's too much junk in this world.

As far as donations, I donate a lot. I always donate my left over clothes, and I make financial donations all the time to various organizations.

You're still not gettin' it. You got to read the entire post. I'm NOT talking about physical things.
 

theblackbox

Golden Member
Oct 1, 2004
1,650
11
81
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
Gifts are as much about the giver as the receiver. Since you didn't give your family any ideas (no gifts is not an idea), your mother gave you clothes because she's tired of seeing you in the same 10 outfits. Smarten up, wear something new when you see family and tell them what's important in your life right now.

That's the thing - I DON'T WANT gifts. I'm going to stop coming for christmas if they continue to get me gifts. Its nothing but anxiety when I see something with my name on it. I don't want junk.

Gifts don't have to be junk. Donations to schooling, charities, interest groups and hobbies could all be great gifts. Are you telling me there's nothing in your life that you wouldn't like to do more of, be better at or, have more impact in? It sounds more like a problem you have with sharing your life with your family than not wanting gifts.

I don't like physical things. I could fit everything I own in my car if I had to minus my bed. I could list everything I own in this thread from memory. I just hate stuff. I hate stuff sitting around that I don't use. If I don't use something for at least a month, I get rid of it. There's too much junk in this world.

As far as donations, I donate a lot. I always donate my left over clothes, and I make financial donations all the time to various organizations.

my brother in law is a lot like you. he lives in a yurt, and gave away all his pets and everything because he hates stuff.
so he sits in his little yurt and contemplates how much he hates life, and only eats fresh vegetables and fruits. but he has you beat. he doesn't have a computer to post junk like this on the internet.

Obviously, this is about you, and you are trying to make a statement.
sounds like you hate your parents too, you gots issues. let them show their love how hey know how.
 

manlymatt83

Lifer
Oct 14, 2005
10,051
44
91
Originally posted by: theblackbox
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
Gifts are as much about the giver as the receiver. Since you didn't give your family any ideas (no gifts is not an idea), your mother gave you clothes because she's tired of seeing you in the same 10 outfits. Smarten up, wear something new when you see family and tell them what's important in your life right now.

That's the thing - I DON'T WANT gifts. I'm going to stop coming for christmas if they continue to get me gifts. Its nothing but anxiety when I see something with my name on it. I don't want junk.

Gifts don't have to be junk. Donations to schooling, charities, interest groups and hobbies could all be great gifts. Are you telling me there's nothing in your life that you wouldn't like to do more of, be better at or, have more impact in? It sounds more like a problem you have with sharing your life with your family than not wanting gifts.

I don't like physical things. I could fit everything I own in my car if I had to minus my bed. I could list everything I own in this thread from memory. I just hate stuff. I hate stuff sitting around that I don't use. If I don't use something for at least a month, I get rid of it. There's too much junk in this world.

As far as donations, I donate a lot. I always donate my left over clothes, and I make financial donations all the time to various organizations.

my brother in law is a lot like you. he lives in a yurt, and gave away all his pets and everything because he hates stuff.
so he sits in his little yurt and contemplates how much he hates life, and only eats fresh vegetables and fruits. but he has you beat. he doesn't have a computer to post junk like this on the internet.

Obviously, this is about you, and you are trying to make a statement.
sounds like you hate your parents too, you gots issues. let them show their love how hey know how.

I love my parents more than I love anything else. Thanks for assuming.
 

theblackbox

Golden Member
Oct 1, 2004
1,650
11
81
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: theblackbox
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
Gifts are as much about the giver as the receiver. Since you didn't give your family any ideas (no gifts is not an idea), your mother gave you clothes because she's tired of seeing you in the same 10 outfits. Smarten up, wear something new when you see family and tell them what's important in your life right now.

That's the thing - I DON'T WANT gifts. I'm going to stop coming for christmas if they continue to get me gifts. Its nothing but anxiety when I see something with my name on it. I don't want junk.

Gifts don't have to be junk. Donations to schooling, charities, interest groups and hobbies could all be great gifts. Are you telling me there's nothing in your life that you wouldn't like to do more of, be better at or, have more impact in? It sounds more like a problem you have with sharing your life with your family than not wanting gifts.

I don't like physical things. I could fit everything I own in my car if I had to minus my bed. I could list everything I own in this thread from memory. I just hate stuff. I hate stuff sitting around that I don't use. If I don't use something for at least a month, I get rid of it. There's too much junk in this world.

As far as donations, I donate a lot. I always donate my left over clothes, and I make financial donations all the time to various organizations.

my brother in law is a lot like you. he lives in a yurt, and gave away all his pets and everything because he hates stuff.
so he sits in his little yurt and contemplates how much he hates life, and only eats fresh vegetables and fruits. but he has you beat. he doesn't have a computer to post junk like this on the internet.

Obviously, this is about you, and you are trying to make a statement.
sounds like you hate your parents too, you gots issues. let them show their love how hey know how.

I love my parents more than I love anything else. Thanks for assuming.

then why would you do something shitty to your mom then come here and post it.
someday, when you've been an adult for a while, you'll realize that sometimes your ideals should come in second to the people that love you.
i didn't assume anything, i just read it as i see it.
 

manlymatt83

Lifer
Oct 14, 2005
10,051
44
91
Originally posted by: theblackbox
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: theblackbox
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
Gifts are as much about the giver as the receiver. Since you didn't give your family any ideas (no gifts is not an idea), your mother gave you clothes because she's tired of seeing you in the same 10 outfits. Smarten up, wear something new when you see family and tell them what's important in your life right now.

That's the thing - I DON'T WANT gifts. I'm going to stop coming for christmas if they continue to get me gifts. Its nothing but anxiety when I see something with my name on it. I don't want junk.

Gifts don't have to be junk. Donations to schooling, charities, interest groups and hobbies could all be great gifts. Are you telling me there's nothing in your life that you wouldn't like to do more of, be better at or, have more impact in? It sounds more like a problem you have with sharing your life with your family than not wanting gifts.

I don't like physical things. I could fit everything I own in my car if I had to minus my bed. I could list everything I own in this thread from memory. I just hate stuff. I hate stuff sitting around that I don't use. If I don't use something for at least a month, I get rid of it. There's too much junk in this world.

As far as donations, I donate a lot. I always donate my left over clothes, and I make financial donations all the time to various organizations.

my brother in law is a lot like you. he lives in a yurt, and gave away all his pets and everything because he hates stuff.
so he sits in his little yurt and contemplates how much he hates life, and only eats fresh vegetables and fruits. but he has you beat. he doesn't have a computer to post junk like this on the internet.

Obviously, this is about you, and you are trying to make a statement.
sounds like you hate your parents too, you gots issues. let them show their love how hey know how.

I love my parents more than I love anything else. Thanks for assuming.

then why would you do something shitty to your mom then come here and post it.
someday, when you've been an adult for a while, you'll realize that sometimes your ideals should come in second to the people that love you.
i didn't assume anything, i just read it as i see it.

Something shitty to my mom? She's the one that did something shitty to me - I explicitly told her not to do something, asked nicely, and she did it anyway - WASTING money and time.

So you're saying I should take all of these clothes she just spent hundreds of dollars on and donate them to good will? I think that would be shitty.

EDIT: Donating to good will would not be shitty - but taking all of the clothes she just bought me would
 

theblackbox

Golden Member
Oct 1, 2004
1,650
11
81
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: theblackbox
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: theblackbox
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
Originally posted by: manlymatt83
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
Gifts are as much about the giver as the receiver. Since you didn't give your family any ideas (no gifts is not an idea), your mother gave you clothes because she's tired of seeing you in the same 10 outfits. Smarten up, wear something new when you see family and tell them what's important in your life right now.

That's the thing - I DON'T WANT gifts. I'm going to stop coming for christmas if they continue to get me gifts. Its nothing but anxiety when I see something with my name on it. I don't want junk.

Gifts don't have to be junk. Donations to schooling, charities, interest groups and hobbies could all be great gifts. Are you telling me there's nothing in your life that you wouldn't like to do more of, be better at or, have more impact in? It sounds more like a problem you have with sharing your life with your family than not wanting gifts.

I don't like physical things. I could fit everything I own in my car if I had to minus my bed. I could list everything I own in this thread from memory. I just hate stuff. I hate stuff sitting around that I don't use. If I don't use something for at least a month, I get rid of it. There's too much junk in this world.

As far as donations, I donate a lot. I always donate my left over clothes, and I make financial donations all the time to various organizations.

my brother in law is a lot like you. he lives in a yurt, and gave away all his pets and everything because he hates stuff.
so he sits in his little yurt and contemplates how much he hates life, and only eats fresh vegetables and fruits. but he has you beat. he doesn't have a computer to post junk like this on the internet.

Obviously, this is about you, and you are trying to make a statement.
sounds like you hate your parents too, you gots issues. let them show their love how hey know how.

I love my parents more than I love anything else. Thanks for assuming.

then why would you do something shitty to your mom then come here and post it.
someday, when you've been an adult for a while, you'll realize that sometimes your ideals should come in second to the people that love you.
i didn't assume anything, i just read it as i see it.

Something shitty to my mom? She's the one that did something shitty to me - I explicitly told her not to do something, asked nicely, and she did it anyway - WASTING money and time.

So you're saying I should take all of these clothes she just spent hundreds of dollars on and donate them to good will? I think that would be shitty.

EDIT: Donating to good will would not be shitty - but taking all of the clothes she just bought me would

no, be gracious if someone does something nice for you. why don't you take them, return them, and with the money do something nice for your mom.
to do it to her face when she gave them to you is just wrong.
some day she'll be dead, and then you'll realize that the time you spent together is precious and you'll never get that back.
grow up and man up. you come here posting about it, just return the clothes and do something nice for her.
as far as her wasting time and money, maybe she doesn't feel the same way you do and doesn't think it was a waste of time or money.
if she did, she would think the 24 or so years she put into you were a waste of time.
some people do things because they like to do things, and thats what they know.
not everyone is like you.