Change rap lyrics to proper English

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BatmanNate

Lifer
Jul 12, 2000
12,444
2
81
After some time has passed
My colleague Dre, MD. came to visit with an impressive amount of quality grain alcohol
And a large diameter marijuana cigarette, cannibis with origins that plagued me and I very nearly asphyxiated
This is not a laughing matter!
I had to take a temporary respite from this indulgence.
Ethanol and Tetrahydrocannabinol, I find myself innebriated at this time.
I am unable to cease this however, I continute to imbibe.
Dre is accompanied by a harem of sorts from the metropolis of Los Angeles
To offer services not of the ice cream variety.
After I ejactulate, I intend to vacate
Do not let this cause you strife, that is merely the way of life we lead
I make no claims of endearment, in fact I intend to make an exit!
And I will.
 

BatmanNate

Lifer
Jul 12, 2000
12,444
2
81
Traveling slowly down the road in an automobile
Inhaling combusted psychoactive compounds
and consuming potent potables
With my hoard of ill gotten currency occupying my thoughts
And vice versa.






And I'm spent!
 

preslove

Lifer
Sep 10, 2003
16,755
63
91
Dude, your lifer status is well deserved :beer:

Originally posted by: BatmanNate
With an over abundance of drama in Long Beach, California
It's rather difficult being a canine known as "Snoop"
But I, by means unknown to myself
Continue to create fecal byproduct of the anus on a daily basis
With permission, I'd like to punt a small amount for the hooligans.
And garner financial compensation as I pass through with ease
The time is 2 o'clock AM and the social gathering remains lively
Because my mother is not home.
I have females in the foyer, copulating with one another
And they do not intend to depart until 6 o'clock AM
What would you do given this opportunity? But of course.
I have prophylactics on my person, as do my comrades.
So extinguish the lights and shut the doors
But we do not feel affection for these promiscuous females.
We intend to smoke 28.3495231 grams of marijuana in honor of this occasion
Gang memebers elevate, women of ill repute decend
while you followers of Oedipus oscillate between one state and the other.

what's the original line?
 

child of wonder

Diamond Member
Aug 31, 2006
8,307
175
106
How do you want it
How do you feel
Comin' up as a ni**a in tha cash game
Livin' in tha fast lane
I'm for real

Love tha way you agrivate your hips
And push your a*s out
Gotta ni**a wantin'
It's so bad
I'm about to pa*s out
Wanna dig you
And I can't even lie about it
Baby just eleviate your cloths
Time to fly up out it
Catch you at a club
Oh s**t, you got me fiendin'
Body talken s**t to me
But I can't comprehend the meaning
Now if ya wanna roll with me
Then here's ya chance
Doin 80 on tha freeway
Wait police, catch me if they can
Forgive me i'm a ridah
Still i'm just a simple man
All I want is money
f**k tha fame
I'm a simple man


-------------------------------------------------------------

In what manner do you desire it?
What is your current mental and physical condition?
Maturing as an African American in this capitalist society
while adhering to a fast paced lifestyle
my existentialism is secure.

I enjoy the way you move your lower extremities in a circular pattern
and extend your posterior in my general direction to incite a response.
This African American male approves.
My need for intercourse with you
nearly causes me to fall into unconsciousness.
Again, I wish to pursue fornication with you
and it restricts me from proclaiming falsifiable information.
Female, remove your clothing in an expedient manner
and we shall escape this establishment.
Goodness, you have me in a state of elevated stress.
Your body is engaging me in harsh context
however, the meaning eludes me.
Yet, if you would like to remain in my company
I will present you with the opportunity
we will exceed safe and legal velocities on public roads
and harass police officers because we do not believe they can apprehend us.
Please imbue me with forgiveness if I am a ridah
Still... I lack substance and complexity.
My principle goal is liquid capital
Recognition in popular media is not my intention
I'm a simple man.
 

child of wonder

Diamond Member
Aug 31, 2006
8,307
175
106
Originally posted by: BatmanNate
After some time has passed
My colleague Dre, MD. came to visit with an impressive amount of quality grain alcohol
And a large diameter marijuana cigarette, cannibis with origins that plagued me and I very nearly asphyxiated
This is not a laughing matter!
I had to take a temporary respite from this indulgence.
Ethanol and Tetrahydrocannabinol, I find myself innebriated at this time.
I am unable to cease this however, I continute to imbibe.
Dre is accompanied by a harem of sorts from the metropolis of Los Angeles
To offer services not of the ice cream variety.
After I ejactulate, I intend to vacate
Do not let this cause you strife, that is merely the way of life we lead
I make no claims of endearment, in fact I intend to make an exit!
And I will.

If I had a Gold Medal I would give it to you!

:laugh:
 

BatmanNate

Lifer
Jul 12, 2000
12,444
2
81
Originally posted by: preslove
Dude, your lifer status is well deserved :beer:

Originally posted by: BatmanNate
With an over abundance of drama in Long Beach, California
It's rather difficult being a canine known as "Snoop"
But I, by means unknown to myself
Continue to create fecal byproduct of the anus on a daily basis
With permission, I'd like to punt a small amount for the hooligans.
And garner financial compensation as I pass through with ease
The time is 2 o'clock AM and the social gathering remains lively
Because my mother is not home.
I have females in the foyer, copulating with one another
And they do not intend to depart until 6 o'clock AM
What would you do given this opportunity? But of course.
I have prophylactics on my person, as do my comrades.
So extinguish the lights and shut the doors
But we do not feel affection for these promiscuous females.
We intend to smoke 28.3495231 grams of marijuana in honor of this occasion
Gang memebers elevate, women of ill repute decend
while you followers of Oedipus oscillate between one state and the other.

what's the original line?


'While you motherf*ckers bounce to this"

;)
 

EightySix Four

Diamond Member
Jul 17, 2004
5,121
49
91
It is 1994 and my trunk is full of contraband
In my rear view mirror a police cruiser approaches
I can either pull my car over or...
Fight with Satan and accelerate
But I don't want to get in trouble
Plus I have money, I can fight the case
So I pull over
The cop asked "Do you understand what I'm stopping you for?"
I reply, because I'm young, black, and you can't see my face?
I'm not sure officer
Are you going to give me a fine, or would you like me to keep guessing?
"You were doing 55 miles per hour in a 54"
May I see your license and registration, and please step out of the car
Are you armed in any way, I know you people like to carry weapons
I am not getting out of my car, everything in my vehicle is legitimate
Do you mind if I examine your car sir?
Sorry officer, my glove compartment is locket, and so is the trunk.
I also understand my rights, you're going to need a warrant for that.
Well don't you know the law, have you ever practiced law?
No, I failed out of Harvard law and live with daddy's money
But I know enough to know you won't illegally search my car
Well, I'm going to have to call a K9 unit
I have 99 issues, but a female is not one
 

Turin39789

Lifer
Nov 21, 2000
12,219
8
81
"Currently the court of black people with concerns and determination is in order,
Judge Dre is presiding in the case of the African American concerned citizens vs the police
The Counsel for the prosecution is Mc Ren, Ice Cube, and Easy making love to his mother E
The court will stand in order, Please call Ice Cube to the stand.

Mr Cube, Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth?
Of course
Please tell everyone here your concerns relating to the police department.

Disrespect intended to the police
This message is emanating from the hidden areas of society
As a young black man I am treated poorly by the police, simply because I am black
and not the majority white race that receives preferential treatment
This leads the police to think that they can kill me with impunity

Disrespect intended to that message. I am not one
For immature and offense police officers who have a badge, gun, and make love to their mothers
to be able to attack me without reason and then detain me in a correctional facility.
If that would occur I would be willing and prepared to fight them in a fair fight in the correctional facility.

These police officers have unfairly targeted me because I am a young adult
and I have jewelry and a communication device that alerts me when someone wants to call me.
These officers will search my car for illicit drugs,
because they believe that every African American is a drug dealer

These officers would rather oppress me and put me into a correctional facility
because they are unwilling to see my friend Lorenzo and I driving in a nice car and having wealth
I will in turn assault the police until they are unrecognizable
and then I will, as they do, cordon off the area surrounding their mangled forms with yellow police tape
to the effect of separating people from the gore
I persist in refusing to consume the meager consumables available in a correctional facility

I'm not sure if these police officers are, in fact, homosexuals, but I believe they are
because when they search black men, they grasp and fondle his testicles
But then again, the only way they can receive sexual pleasure is through the use of a firearm
I see the police as police regardless of their race, showing no sympathy for black cops
These African American police officers will over zealously attack African Americans in order to impress the Caucasian police officers"




Someone Else can Finish.
 

meltdown75

Lifer
Nov 17, 2004
37,558
7
81
With so much drama in the Long Beach California area
It is quite challenging being Snoop Doggy Dogg.
However, I somehow consistently find a way
To keep inventing lyrics and rhymes most days.
May I recite something that I have crafted recently,
for my friends and create a few choice situations
As I make my way through this carefree evening?
This gathering is still quite active because my mother is away.
I have some lady friends in the living room acting amorously
They are going to be here until 6AM.
So what would you like to do? Darn it.
I have a pocket full of contraceptives and so do my friends.
Please turn off the lights and close the exits to the home.
However, we will do our best to maintain platonic relations with these females.
We are going to smoke quite a bit of marijuana,
Favouring unlawful friends while our lady friends are acting sexy and everyone is dancing.

Driving down the street, smoking Indonesion marijuana cigarettes
Drinking a mixture of gin and fruit juice.
Quite relaxed
With my mind on my finances and my finances firmly in my thoughts.
 

child of wonder

Diamond Member
Aug 31, 2006
8,307
175
106
Originally posted by: sm8000
Funny, there is a similar thread ongoing at the Awful Forums, although not restricted to any musical genre. Here are 25 of the rap submissions - yes, not all of them are rap, and some repeat. But enjoy anyway!

(With props to their respective Goons):

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Those are awesome. :thumbsup:


Frozen water, frozen water, recently born human.
 

DivideBYZero

Lifer
May 18, 2001
24,117
2
0
Listen to what I have to say; This situation is like hallucinating on acid whilst having carnal knowledge with your mother.
The common percieved knowledge is thus.
Everone I know is bothering me with information regarding gossip.
I don't care at all about what that fellow said, my good man.
That is what is wrong with you.
Chaps, you chaps are just like women.
Prostitute-rear end chaps that talk, like Oedipus, incessantly.
Please try to improve yourself and be original.
Do you understand me?
Be independant, chap. WOMAN!