braindead morons

[guyver01]

user: i have a question about my username

me: ok... what is the question?

user: my name is john smith... why is my username johnr.smith?

me: isnt your middle initial r?

user: yes

me: well.. we have multiple john smith's with the company

user: so.. why is my username johnr.smith?

me: so we know who you are

user: well.. can't i be john.smith?

me: no. that already exists for someone else

user: who

me: john smith

user: oh. ok

 

[Sea Moose]

seriously?

 

[guyver01]

Originally posted by: Sea Moose
seriously?

yup

<cry>

 

[Sea Moose]

I love story time with uncle guyver!

 

[Sea Moose]

could we have another ? I know you got heaps of real IT related stupidity stories

 

[geno]

Originally posted by: Sea Moose
could we have another ?

 

[guyver01]

user: i cant log into my pc

me: ok.. what happens when you try?

user: it gives me an error

me: ok.. what error do you get?

user: it says it dont work

me: that's not a windows login error... what's the full error message you get

user: i dont know.. it dont work

me: (checks Active Directory.. not locked out... checks "lockoutstatus" .. no bad passwords) Well.. in order for me to help you, i need to know exactly what error you get

user: well, i havent logged into the pc for about a week, so i dont remember what error i got

me: well.. can you TRY logging in now, so we can find out what error you get?

user: ok.. i'll call back when i'm at work.

:clock:

 

[Sea Moose]

is this real?

 

[guyver01]

Originally posted by: Sea Moose
is this real?

call that i took less than 10 minutes ago.


i hate the people employed at my company sometimes

 

[Sea Moose]

how many people are employed at your work?

 

[Wheezer]

Originally posted by: guyver01

Originally posted by: Sea Moose
is this real?

call that i took less than 10 minutes ago.


i hate the people employed at my company sometimes

I hear ya...I do tech support for a college and hear the same type of stupid shit.

Look on the bright side...at least you're not guy making a living scraping dead animals off the road in the summer.

 

[guyver01]

call that i just got off of:

user: i cant remember my password.. can you reset it?

me: sure.. which application or program are you trying to access?

user: well i havent been to work in a few days, and i didnt write them down when i last changed them.. so can you change all of them?

me: sure, but i need to know which applications you're trying to go into, as we have over 1,000 different userid's and passwords you could potentially have

user: all of the ones i have

me: i understand that.. but i need specifics. you're not going to have access to 1,000 different servers and applications, so i need to know what you're trying to get into

user: i dont know.

me: well.. then i wont be able to assist you.

user: well.. how should i do my job today?

me: i would suggest speaking to your supervisor, so they can tell you what systems you are trying to access.

user: why would i ask them?

me: well if you dont know what systems you need to get into, they can tell you which ones you need to do your job

user: well they're going to think im stupid.. they just told me that on friday

me: if you didnt write them down, you have no other choice.

user: shit

 

[Sea Moose]

Guyver do you do IT for a nut house?

Lol yous should post this shit on a notice board at work so people can see how dumb they are!

 

[guyver01]

Originally posted by: Sea Moose
how many people are employed at your work?

i think the last bit of info i read was over 17,000 employees in the company

 

[geno]

Originally posted by: guyver01
user: well they're going to think im stupid.. they just told me that on friday

Correction, they're going to find out you're stupid.

 

[guyver01]

Originally posted by: Wheezer
I hear ya...I do tech support for a college and hear the same type of stupid shit.

Look on the bright side...at least you're not guy making a living scraping dead animals off the road in the summer.

Monday's is always fun day... noone remembers their passwords from the weekend

 

[guyver01]

Originally posted by: geno

Originally posted by: guyver01
user: well they're going to think im stupid.. they just told me that on friday

Correction, they're going to find out you're stupid.

LOL that's exactly what i said in my head

 

[Sea Moose]

Guyver do passwords change daily? do you work in a high security space mining world domination inc firm?

 

[guyver01]

Originally posted by: Sea Moose
Guyver do you do IT for a nut house?

Lol yous should post this shit on a notice board at work so people can see how dumb they are!

LOL..

nope.. i work for a major national telecom provider.

whenever i read public comments about customers thinking our employees are morons.. i tell myself "they dont know the half of it"

 

[guyver01]

Originally posted by: Sea Moose
Guyver do passwords change daily? do you work in a high security space mining world domination inc firm?

nope... passwords expire every 90 days.

 

[Sea Moose]

lol

people at your work sure are stupid uncle guyver.

Ok, heres one from people at my work

There was a fat guy, and he had to get on top of a commercial building. So he set up his extension ladder, as you do, and he climbed up. Except the dumbarse forgot to tie the top of the ladder off with a piece of rope or ockey strap. So when he stepped off the ladder and onto the roof, the ladder slipped sideways and .......

....


xx
>
O


Went through the windscreen of a brand new bmw!!!!!!

The person that owned the bmw refused to put the ladder back up so fatty could get down (which was really bad cause fatty was roasting in the sun and had diabetes)

eventually the cops came and let fatty down, he lost his job shortly after ..... ( it was the last straw he was a constant stuff up)

 

[boomerang]

Here's what it looks like from the other side.

Me: How come this dedicated printer I have to deal with is spontaneously printing on it's own?

IT: What do you mean, on it's own?

Me: Like I said, I'll just be sitting here doing whatever, without the app it's dedicated to even running and the printer will just take off and start printing all on it's own. It prints out page after page of gobbledygook and I have to turn it off to get it to stop.

IT: That's impossible. You're the only one that can print to that printer.

(This goes on for nearly two months)

Me: Hey, about that printer issue.

IT: (heavy sigh) What? (mouthpiece is covered, and I can hear "It's him again .....".

Me: I got looking of some of the gobbledygook and I see what appears to be a user ID. Can you confirm this is actually a user ID? I'm thinking this might help with your diagnosis. (I know there is actually no diagnosis going on)

IT: Well, I'm not sure if I can do that, what do you think is the problem? (mouthpiece covered and snickering is going on)

Me: Well, I think you've got the same IP assigned to two different printers.

IT: THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!!!!!

Me: Could you humor me and just check?

IT: Well I guess I could but I'm telling you right now that .......... oh my god!

Me: What?

IT: How in the hell did this happen?

Me: So there is another printer with the same IP?

IT: Um, yes.

The IP they assigned to this printer had already been assigned to an enormous plotter upstairs in the engineering dept. It was trying to print plots. All told, before the problem was resolved, nearly 11 weeks passed.

 

[Sea Moose]

great story boomerang! Haha

 

[TecHNooB]

Originally posted by: boomerang
Here's what it looks like from the other side.

Me: How come this dedicated printer I have to deal with is spontaneously printing on it's own?

IT: What do you mean, on it's own?

Me: Like I said, I'll just be sitting here doing whatever, without the app it's dedicated to even running and the printer will just take off and start printing all on it's own. It prints out page after page of gobbledygook and I have to turn it off to get it to stop.

IT: That's impossible. You're the only one that can print to that printer.

(This goes on for nearly two months)

Me: Hey, about that printer issue.

IT: (heavy sigh) What? (mouthpiece is covered, and I can hear "It's him again .....".

Me: I got looking of some of the gobbledygook and I see what appears to be a user ID. Can you confirm this is actually a user ID? I'm thinking this might help with your diagnosis. (I know there is actually no diagnosis going on)

IT: Well, I'm not sure if I can do that, what do you think is the problem? (mouthpiece covered and snickering is going on)

Me: Well, I think you've got the same IP assigned to two different printers.

IT: THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!!!!!

Me: Could you humor me and just check?

IT: Well I guess I could but I'm telling you right now that .......... oh my god!

Me: What?

IT: How in the hell did this happen?

Me: So there is another printer with the same IP?

IT: Um, yes.

The IP they assigned to this printer had already been assigned to an enormous plotter upstairs in the engineering dept. It was trying to print plots. All told, before the problem was resolved, nearly 11 weeks passed.

Money.

 

[nerp]

Originally posted by: boomerang
Here's what it looks like from the other side.

Me: How come this dedicated printer I have to deal with is spontaneously printing on it's own?

IT: What do you mean, on it's own?

Me: Like I said, I'll just be sitting here doing whatever, without the app it's dedicated to even running and the printer will just take off and start printing all on it's own. It prints out page after page of gobbledygook and I have to turn it off to get it to stop.

IT: That's impossible. You're the only one that can print to that printer.

(This goes on for nearly two months)

Me: Hey, about that printer issue.

IT: (heavy sigh) What? (mouthpiece is covered, and I can hear "It's him again .....".

Me: I got looking of some of the gobbledygook and I see what appears to be a user ID. Can you confirm this is actually a user ID? I'm thinking this might help with your diagnosis. (I know there is actually no diagnosis going on)

IT: Well, I'm not sure if I can do that, what do you think is the problem? (mouthpiece covered and snickering is going on)

Me: Well, I think you've got the same IP assigned to two different printers.

IT: THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!!!!!

Me: Could you humor me and just check?

IT: Well I guess I could but I'm telling you right now that .......... oh my god!

Me: What?

IT: How in the hell did this happen?

Me: So there is another printer with the same IP?

IT: Um, yes.

The IP they assigned to this printer had already been assigned to an enormous plotter upstairs in the engineering dept. It was trying to print plots. All told, before the problem was resolved, nearly 11 weeks passed.

I love when smug idiots are proven wrong. Nice work.