Blonde joke

[Twofootputt]

A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no
lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and
the horse immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady
and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle.
In terror, she grabs for the horse's mane, but cannot seem to get a
firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but she
slides down the side of the horse anyway. The horse gallops along,
seemingly ignorant of its slipping rider. Finally, giving up her frail grip,
the blonde attempts to leap away from the horse and throw herself to
safety. Unfortunately, her foot becomes entangled in the stirrup, and
she is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head is
struck against the ground, over and over.
As her head is battered against the ground, she is mere moments
away from unconsciousness when to her great fortune, Bobby, the
Wal-Mart greeter, sees her and unplugs the horse

 

[DainBramaged]

uhhh.....okay

 

[Scrooge2]

 

[xcript]

I'll give that a "heh..".

 

[Nikamichi]

:thumbsdown:

 

[Quixfire]

This one is better...

A plane is on its way to Houston when a blonde in Economy Class gets up and moves to the First Class section and sits down.

The flight attendant watches her do this and asks to see her ticket. She then tells the blonde that she paid for Economy and that she will have to sit in the back.

The blonde replies "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Houston and I'm going to stay right here!" The flight attendant goes into the cockpit and tells the co-pilot that there is a blond bimbo sitting in First Class that belongs in Economy and won't move back to her seat.

The co-pilot goes back to the blonde and tries to explain that because she only paid for Economy she will have to leave and return to her seat.

The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Houston and I'm staying right here!"

The co-pilot tells the pilot that he probably should have the police waiting when they land to arrest the dumb blonde woman who won't listen to reason.

The pilot says "You say she is blonde? I'll handle this, I'm married to a blonde. I speak blonde." He goes back to the blonde, whispers in her ear, and she says "Oh, I'm sorry," gets up and moves back to her seat in the Economy Section.

The flight attendant and co-pilot are amazed and asked him what he said to make her move without any fuss.

"I told her First Class wasn't going to Houston."

 

[maziwanka]

booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

editted: in response to the OP

 

[Ninjja]

Originally posted by: maziwanka
booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

editted: in response to the OP

lol I was gonna say, that was pretty good.

EDIT: it's edited, not editted.

 

[maziwanka]

Originally posted by: Ninjja

Originally posted by: maziwanka
booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

editted: in response to the OP

lol I was gonna say, that was pretty good.

EDIT: it's edited, not editted.

WOW. you will never correct me in public like this again

 

[boomdart]

Hahahaha, it was a delayed laugh, but it's pretty funny if you actually imagine it.

 

[boomdart]

Originally posted by: Quixfire
This one is better...

A plane is on its way to Houston when a blonde in Economy Class gets up and moves to the First Class section and sits down.

The flight attendant watches her do this and asks to see her ticket. She then tells the blonde that she paid for Economy and that she will have to sit in the back.

The blonde replies "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Houston and I'm going to stay right here!" The flight attendant goes into the cockpit and tells the co-pilot that there is a blond bimbo sitting in First Class that belongs in Economy and won't move back to her seat.

The co-pilot goes back to the blonde and tries to explain that because she only paid for Economy she will have to leave and return to her seat.

The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Houston and I'm staying right here!"

The co-pilot tells the pilot that he probably should have the police waiting when they land to arrest the dumb blonde woman who won't listen to reason.

The pilot says "You say she is blonde? I'll handle this, I'm married to a blonde. I speak blonde." He goes back to the blonde, whispers in her ear, and she says "Oh, I'm sorry," gets up and moves back to her seat in the Economy Section.

The flight attendant and co-pilot are amazed and asked him what he said to make her move without any fuss.

"I told her First Class wasn't going to Houston."

No, yours is far too long ; )

 

[Ninjja]

Originally posted by: maziwanka

Originally posted by: Ninjja

Originally posted by: maziwanka
booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

editted: in response to the OP

lol I was gonna say, that was pretty good.

EDIT: it's edited, not editted.

WOW. you will never correct me in public like this again

lol.

 

[UnoSigmaPi]

HAHAHA!!!

 

[dquan97]

I like the 2nd joke better

 

[jdiddy]

Originally posted by: dquan97
I like the 2nd joke better

 

[AFB]

Originally posted by: jdiddy

Originally posted by: dquan97
I like the 2nd joke better

 

[z0mb13]

the jigsaw puzzle one is the best

 

[Entity]

Originally posted by: amdfanboy

Originally posted by: jdiddy

Originally posted by: dquan97
I like the 2nd joke better

 

[PanzerIV]

I liked it.

 

[brunswickite]

Originally posted by: Entity

Originally posted by: amdfanboy

Originally posted by: jdiddy

Originally posted by: dquan97
I like the 2nd joke better

 

[ScottMac]

There's a blond Flight Attendent going on her first overnight line. They get to the hotel at the destinations city and the captain tells the crew " Everyone be down here in the lobby at 7:00am sharp, we have to prep the aircraft."

Well, 7:00am the next morning, everyone but the new blond flight attendent is present. The captain gives her another five minutes, then calls her room.

She answers the phone immediately, and the captain asks why she's not downstairs, as ordered. She responds that che can't get out of her room, she's trapped. When he asks what the problem is, she explains: " Well, there's three doors .... one's the bathroom, one's the closet, and the other has a `Do Not Disturb' sign hanging on the door knob ......."

FWIW

Scott

 

[Brutuskend]

Originally posted by: ScottMac
There's a blond Flight Attendent going on her first overnight line. They get to the hotel at the destinations city and the captain tells the crew " Everyone be down here in the lobby at 7:00am sharp, we have to prep the aircraft."

Well, 7:00am the next morning, everyone but the new blond flight attendent is present. The captain gives her another five minutes, then calls her room.

She answers the phone immediately, and the captain asks why she's not downstairs, as ordered. She responds that che can't get out of her room, she's trapped. When he asks what the problem is, she explains: " Well, there's three doors .... one's the bathroom, one's the closet, and the other has a `Do Not Disturb' sign hanging on the door knob ......."

FWIW

Scott

OK, well THAT'S one I hadn't heard.

 

[her209]

Have you heard the one where the blonde secretary tried to copy a CD with the Xerox machine?

 

[cain]

heh is all you getting pal