- Dec 31, 2000
- 10,735
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Bellsouth gives me a cold call trying to get me to sign up for DSL. The saga begins:
Me:yo
BS (Bellsouth, not bull....well after hearing their pitch, n/m) telemarketer: uh hello
me: yeah, what do you want?
BS: hi, i'm calling to inform you that bellsouth DSL is now available in your area
me: isnt dsl the service where the distance from the central routing station (or whatever the hell they call it) is inversely related to the service quality? (the service deterriorates as you go farther out and is better when you're close)
BS: No, absoluteley not.
me: really?
BS: yeah, that's cable you're talking about (no pun intended with the bs abbreviation)
me: is that so?
BS: uh huh
me: what are you offering
BS: yes, we're offering 50% off activation and the DSL modem
me: thats nice, but i'll only try out your service if i can get a no cost or obligation trial period
BS: oh well thats what were offering
me: ok, so how's it work
bs: well we charge you 99.95 for installation and 99.95 for the dsl modem, and we credit you 50% back if you dont like it
me: ok, so if I dont like it, and send everything back, i'm still paying the 50%
bs: thats right
me: but how is that no cost? if i try it and dont like it, i'm still paying for it
bs: uh
*slight pause*
bs: well i can guarantee you that DSL is faster than anything you've experienced
me: really?
bs: yes, what internet connections have you used?
me: (now i'm bs-ing) T1, T3, OC93, OC36,OC3 that kind of stuff
bs: you've used a T1?
me: (still bs) yep
bs: what's a T1?
*at this point i'm trying to hold in all my laughter*
me: ah, its just another internet connection
bs: oh, well DSL is much faster than that T1 stuff you speak of
*chucking like mad right about now*
me: ok, so you're telling me that if i want to try your service, without cost or obligation, it's gonna cost me $100
bs: uh yeah
me: so doesnt that defeat the "no cost" portion of our conversation?
bs: uh....yeah
me: ok, i'll let you know
bs: dont you want to have a service faster than dial up?
me: yeah, sure i do
bs: so why dont you want to get in on this new program
me: i've already got cable
Me:yo
BS (Bellsouth, not bull....well after hearing their pitch, n/m) telemarketer: uh hello
me: yeah, what do you want?
BS: hi, i'm calling to inform you that bellsouth DSL is now available in your area
me: isnt dsl the service where the distance from the central routing station (or whatever the hell they call it) is inversely related to the service quality? (the service deterriorates as you go farther out and is better when you're close)
BS: No, absoluteley not.
me: really?
BS: yeah, that's cable you're talking about (no pun intended with the bs abbreviation)
me: is that so?
BS: uh huh
me: what are you offering
BS: yes, we're offering 50% off activation and the DSL modem
me: thats nice, but i'll only try out your service if i can get a no cost or obligation trial period
BS: oh well thats what were offering
me: ok, so how's it work
bs: well we charge you 99.95 for installation and 99.95 for the dsl modem, and we credit you 50% back if you dont like it
me: ok, so if I dont like it, and send everything back, i'm still paying the 50%
bs: thats right
me: but how is that no cost? if i try it and dont like it, i'm still paying for it
bs: uh
*slight pause*
bs: well i can guarantee you that DSL is faster than anything you've experienced
me: really?
bs: yes, what internet connections have you used?
me: (now i'm bs-ing) T1, T3, OC93, OC36,OC3 that kind of stuff
bs: you've used a T1?
me: (still bs) yep
bs: what's a T1?
*at this point i'm trying to hold in all my laughter*
me: ah, its just another internet connection
bs: oh, well DSL is much faster than that T1 stuff you speak of
*chucking like mad right about now*
me: ok, so you're telling me that if i want to try your service, without cost or obligation, it's gonna cost me $100
bs: uh yeah
me: so doesnt that defeat the "no cost" portion of our conversation?
bs: uh....yeah
me: ok, i'll let you know
bs: dont you want to have a service faster than dial up?
me: yeah, sure i do
bs: so why dont you want to get in on this new program
me: i've already got cable