Baptists for Brownback

MemoryInAGarden

Senior member
Oct 26, 2003
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Here is a group of "Baptists" supporting the Kansas senator. This group seems awfully close in viewpoints to the Westboro Baptist Church, out of Topeka.

Those Hellbound Folks

An excerpt from the page:

People Who are Probably Going To Hell

Regardless of how reluctant we are sometimes, it is our duty as Chrisitians (Baptists) to pray for those we deem already damned to Hell. As easy as it is to dismiss these people as lost forever to eternal damnation, we must remember that in Christ, anything is possible no matter how remote the chance.

Given the enormity of sinners that we come across on a daily basis we simply cannot list them all. We whill, however, try and update this list as frequently as necessary.

WARNING: Before visiting any of the following links you are cautioned to say the following prayer.

IN JESUS NAME, I BIND UP EVERY DEMON COMING ACROSS THE COMPUTER LINES, AND I RETURN THEM AND ANY CURSES.IN JESUS NAME, I COVER MYSELF IN THE BLOOD OF JESUS. I COVER THIS COMPUTER AND THE INTERNET ROAD I TRAVEL IN THE BLOOD OF JESUS. I TAKE AUTHORITY AND DOMINION OVER ALL WEB SITES, WEB MASTERS, WEB DOMAINS, AND DEMONS OF THE INTERNET SUPER HIGHWAY SO THEY DO NOT CROSS MY PATH. I DISPATCH ANGELS AHEAD OF ME TO PROTECT ME.

IN JESUS NAME, I CUT ALL UNGODLY SILVER CORDS AND LAY LINES.

AS YOUR WAR CLUB AND WEAPONS OF WAR I BREAK DOWN, UNDAM, AND BLOW UP ALL WALLS OF PROTECTION AROUND ALL HOMOSEXUALS, WITCHES, WARLOCKS, WIZARDS, SATANISTS, ATHEISTS, LIBERALS, DEMOCRATS, SORCERERS, AND THE LIKE, AND I BREAK THE POWER OF ALL CURSES, HEXES, VEXES, SPELLS, CHARMS, FETISHES, PSYCHIC PRAYERS, PSYCHIC THOUGHTS, ALL WITCHCRAFT, SORCERY, SATIRE, PARODY, MAGIC, VOODOO, ALL MIND CONTROL, JINXES, POTIONS, BEWITCHMENTS, DEATH, DESTRUCTION, SICKNESS, PAIN, TORMENT, PSYCHIC POWER, PSYCHIC WARFARE, PRAYER CHAINS, INCENSE AND CANDLE BURNING, INCANTATIONS, CHANTING, UNGODLY BLESSINGS AND HOODOO, CRYSTALS, AND EVERYTHING ELSE BEING SENT MY WAY, OR MY FAMILY MEMBER?S WAY, OR ANY CHRISTIAN MINISTRIES WAY, AND I RETURN IT, AND THE DEMONS TO THE SENDER, TEN FOLD.

AMEN.

At the time of our encounter with these infidels there was no links to pornography, Satan Worship, or extreme foul language. Given the nature of the sinner and their willingness to sin we cannot gurantee that things will not be added at a later time. That is why it is crucial that you say the above prayer before visiting any of the listed web sites. If you have come across someone who is need of deliverance from their sickness you may email Lynette Bryant, Board Editor or Mrs. T.D. Gaines-Crockett, Site Editor, and they will review the site for submission to this page.
 

sandorski

No Lifer
Oct 10, 1999
70,672
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I like how it ends, Returning the imagined horror back on the perp by being the perp except 10x better!

These guys sure got it good! Maybe they could right a Lotto number selector Prayer. You just got to word it strongly enough that the wrong numbers wouldn't dare be chosen by the one saying the prayer!! :eek:
 

kage69

Lifer
Jul 17, 2003
30,567
45,447
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LOL, ahhhhh Baptists....



I'm sure Brownback struck a gracious tone when he heard this, but as soon as he was alone behind closed doors was all "M-O-T-H-E-R-F-V-C-K-E-R!!!" and just started throwing things for a few minutes.


Wonder how much this story will be run in the weeks to come... ;)


 

jrenz

Banned
Jan 11, 2006
1,788
0
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And some of you idiots believe anything you see on the internet.

By visiting this entertaining Godly site OR by sending an e-mail submission to Mrs. T.D. Gaines-Crockett©, Lynelle Bryant© OR posting to this site, YOU ARE CERTIFYING THAT YOU ARE 18 YEARS OR OLDER AND you are granting Baptists For Brownback 2008© a worldwide, royalty-free, perpetual, irrevocable, non-exclusive and fully sublicensable right and license to use, reproduce, modify, adapt, publish, translate, create derivative works from, distribute, perform and display your submission (in whole or part) and/or to incorporate it in other works in any form, media, or technology now known or later developed. The original posts, prayers, all materials and even the pasquinading by our mockers and antagonists found on this site and all materials within are Copyright© protected through 2007 by myself and/or the contributors. Many antogonists on the political Left would like to call it political satire so perhaps everything posted here should be understood in that context. Whatever it takes to keep their tiny brains from overloading. Please keep in mind that Posting of personal phone numbers or information that may lead to personal injury or harassment is deemed illegal on this forum under congressional legislation, state law and various personal protection acts. Please refrain from divulging information of this kind in such a public forum for obvious security purposes. God Bless America.
 

kage69

Lifer
Jul 17, 2003
30,567
45,447
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And some of you idiots believe anything you see on the internet.


I don't think that lame disclaimer is the thunderbolt you wish it was jrenz. The tone of the bolded indicates it is not satire, but it's fine if those damn tiny-minded leftists want to think of it as such. But then that doesn't make sense; if anyone were to look there and want to pass it all off as satire, it would be like-minded conservatives trying to show that this is no big deal. The commie pinko leftists that give your kind heartburn would no doubt gleefully present this as an etched-in-stone example of how nutty the religious right is, or more accurately - Baptists. So what gives?

Is this another attempt by righties to burn nominees that they don't agree with, or is it a religious fundie group trying to play the Colbert Report game?


Do tell, us idiots are keen to know...

 

jrenz

Banned
Jan 11, 2006
1,788
0
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Originally posted by: kage69
And some of you idiots believe anything you see on the internet.


I don't think that lame disclaimer is the thunderbolt you wish it was jrenz. The tone of the bolded indicates it is not satire, but it's fine if those damn tiny-minded leftists want to think of it as such. But then that doesn't make sense; if anyone were to look there and want to pass it all off as satire, it would be like-minded conservatives trying to show that this is no big deal. The commie pinko leftists that give your kind heartburn would no doubt gleefully present this as an etched-in-stone example of how nutty the religious right is, or more accurately - Baptists. So what gives?

Is this another attempt by righties to burn nominees that don't agree with, or is it a religious fundie group trying to play the Colbert Report game?


Do tell, us idiots are keen to know...

The fact that the first line says it's an entertaining site doesn't say something to you? What about the fact that the names of the two people are copyrighted?

I can't believe we're actually having this conversation...
 

kage69

Lifer
Jul 17, 2003
30,567
45,447
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The fact that the first line says it's an entertaining site doesn't say something to you? What about the fact that the names of the two people are copyrighted?

Seeing as how most right-wing pundits and orgs do need to make their messages entertaining to hold their audiences, I guess I didn't feel the admittance was any big deal. Maybe it's from all the Baptists I lived around in Florida, or the far too much time I put into reading about the Westboro "church," but that content didn't immediately stand right out and scream satire. That "entertaining" is in the first sentence is about as relevant as "Godly" being in the first sentence IMO.

No, I'm aware the names are copyrighted, I was referring mainly to your bolded portions - I assumed (I know I know....) that because you weren't drawing attention to it we were speaking of the actual content creator(s) instead, which kinda prompted my questions. Pardon me for putting direct emphasis on something you chose to put direct emphasis on.




Edit: The Reply section there is hilarious. ;)


 

manowar821

Diamond Member
Mar 1, 2007
6,063
0
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WOW! Look at all of the unoriginal insult rehashes.

And these people are going to vote in 2008.

America-haters... Well if these people are who represent the USA, then yes, I'm an america-hater.